I complied a little list of FDR terms, mostly for fun, but also for the newbies out there. Please add more!
Aesthetics - A branch of philosophy which examines beauty and good taste. When applying aesthetics to behavior, it is outside the realm of morality. For example, it is aesthetically preferable to be prompt, but it is not immoral to be late. Aesthetics helps evaluate certain behaviors which are better than others, but not necessarily right or wrong. Being late isn’t evil, but it is preferable to be on time.
Armadillo Rollover Defense - Play dead! A defense tactic used to avoid criticism and, in more extreme cases, reality itself. It is a form of denial where the party in question plays dumb. Example: "Mom, I feel upset about certain things that happened in my childhood." Mom sticks fingers in her ears and starts singing, "Lalalalala."
Asshole Proximity Disorder - A state of dissociation or depression that manifests only when you are around certain people, namely assholes. This negative emotional response is not dysfunctional, it is an appropriate reaction to being around corrupt people.
Blarp - To vent or unload a lot of negative emotions on another person, which temporarily transfers the emotional pain to the other person (see Poison Container). The blarp is distinctive for how unproductive it is. There will be relief in the moment, a catharsis of sorts, but none of the underlying problems have been resolved.
Blut - A Beauty Slut. Someone who seeks beauty in a romantic relationship in order to increase status. Someone who values beauty over virtues.
BNAP - Bullshit Non-Apology. An "apology" that doesn't imply any personal guilt or responsibility. Example: “I’m sorry I yelled, but you upset me.” Translation: “My bad behavior is your fault.” Often there will be a covert insult embedded in the BNAP.
Fog - A form of dishonesty that occurs when there is a disconnection with the self. It is a defense mechanism in which your mind has protected itself from painful memories or feelings, so when those things come up your mind goes blank. It is often marked by confusion, evasion, and non-direct answers like “I don’t know.” More info here.
Poison Container - Abusive behavior which repeatedly uses someone as a dumping ground for unprocessed psychological pain. Psychological pain is transferrable; it can be lessened, temporarily, by unloading on another person. The most vile form of this is from a parent to a child. A child does not have developed internal boundaries yet, so this kind of violation affects children more than it would adults. Further, a child is trapped, he or she is involuntarily in the situation and cannot get away. It is seriously sick.
UPB - Universally Preferable Behavior. To UPB someone is to point out double standard or
hypocrisy that they are employing. As in, "Oh, your mom wants to tell you that you are being inconsiderate by not coming to Sunday dinner? UPB her ass! She is being inconsiderate by not caring about the fact that you don't want to come to Sunday dinner." Read the book!
RTR - Real-Time Relationship. A relationship in which there is freedom to be completely honest in the moment about one’s thoughts and feelings. See the brilliant, life changing book here.
Virtue - A quality considered morally good or desirable in a person. Examples: honesty, integrity, courage, strength, empathy, etc.
Zinger - A remark which is abrasive or stinging, but not intentionally so. While comment wasn’t meant to hurt the person it was directed to, it was still painful and needs to be corrected. This typically occurs because of collateral damage from an unprocessed childhood. Once one has awareness of this though, it is preventable with introspection, processing, and personal responsibility.