Jump to content

Leaderboard

Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation on 07/11/2017 in all areas

  1. I'd caution against Steven Franssen.
    2 points
  2. I complied a little list of FDR terms, mostly for fun, but also for the newbies out there. Please add more! Aesthetics - A branch of philosophy which examines beauty and good taste. When applying aesthetics to behavior, it is outside the realm of morality. For example, it is aesthetically preferable to be prompt, but it is not immoral to be late. Aesthetics helps evaluate certain behaviors which are better than others, but not necessarily right or wrong. Being late isn’t evil, but it is preferable to be on time. Armadillo Rollover Defense - Play dead! A defense tactic used to avoid criticism and, in more extreme cases, reality itself. It is a form of denial where the party in question plays dumb. Example: "Mom, I feel upset about certain things that happened in my childhood." Mom sticks fingers in her ears and starts singing, "Lalalalala." Asshole Proximity Disorder - A state of dissociation or depression that manifests only when you are around certain people, namely assholes. This negative emotional response is not dysfunctional, it is an appropriate reaction to being around corrupt people. Blarp - To vent or unload a lot of negative emotions on another person, which temporarily transfers the emotional pain to the other person (see Poison Container). The blarp is distinctive for how unproductive it is. There will be relief in the moment, a catharsis of sorts, but none of the underlying problems have been resolved. Blut - A Beauty Slut. Someone who seeks beauty in a romantic relationship in order to increase status. Someone who values beauty over virtues. BNAP - Bullshit Non-Apology. An "apology" that doesn't imply any personal guilt or responsibility. Example: “I’m sorry I yelled, but you upset me.” Translation: “My bad behavior is your fault.” Often there will be a covert insult embedded in the BNAP. Fog - A form of dishonesty that occurs when there is a disconnection with the self. It is a defense mechanism in which your mind has protected itself from painful memories or feelings, so when those things come up your mind goes blank. It is often marked by confusion, evasion, and non-direct answers like “I don’t know.” More info here. Poison Container - Abusive behavior which repeatedly uses someone as a dumping ground for unprocessed psychological pain. Psychological pain is transferrable; it can be lessened, temporarily, by unloading on another person. The most vile form of this is from a parent to a child. A child does not have developed internal boundaries yet, so this kind of violation affects children more than it would adults. Further, a child is trapped, he or she is involuntarily in the situation and cannot get away. It is seriously sick. UPB - Universally Preferable Behavior. To UPB someone is to point out double standard or hypocrisy that they are employing. As in, "Oh, your mom wants to tell you that you are being inconsiderate by not coming to Sunday dinner? UPB her ass! She is being inconsiderate by not caring about the fact that you don't want to come to Sunday dinner." Read the book! RTR - Real-Time Relationship. A relationship in which there is freedom to be completely honest in the moment about one’s thoughts and feelings. See the brilliant, life changing book here. Virtue - A quality considered morally good or desirable in a person. Examples: honesty, integrity, courage, strength, empathy, etc. Zinger - A remark which is abrasive or stinging, but not intentionally so. While comment wasn’t meant to hurt the person it was directed to, it was still painful and needs to be corrected. This typically occurs because of collateral damage from an unprocessed childhood. Once one has awareness of this though, it is preventable with introspection, processing, and personal responsibility.
    1 point
  3. They don't...and I never said otherwise. Also, I do not see how is this relevant to what I said. Presumably, you are an atheist because through reason and evidence you came to the conclusion that believing in God is irrational and unsubstantiated. The fact that you are an atheist is a true and honest fact about yourself (even if I grant for the moment the fact that God actually exists) and if you would rather hide truths about yourself due to the fact that there are prejudiced people who would immediately jump to unfounded conclusions about you, then you are either surrendering your reason or at least your honesty to other's prejudices, irrationality and lack of curiosity. Either way, it serves their interests while being detrimental to you. I can't imagine how you can think this is a good idea.
    1 point
  4. I would recommend me. I work with me just about every day, and I kind of like the guy.
    1 point
  5. YAD Principle - Short for "You're A Dick", the YAD principle is a method of cutting through grey areas in ethics. Is it immoral to buy up all the land around a village, build a moat and charge the villagers to cross? (It is his property, after all). We don't need to go into all of the many considerations that could be made because the YAD principle makes short work of this ethical conundrum: the moat guy is a dick.
    1 point
  6. This video really helped me gain clarity in a similar situation. Keep in mind that doing this might be opening the door to more hurt from them. I think there is always a little part of us that hopes they will read the letter, feel horrible, break down, realize what they've done. The reality of that is much different. I'm so sorry for what you went through and glad that you are getting help. No matter what you choose to do Confronting Parents—Its Risk & Valuehttps://youtu.be/ua47SXnthxA
    1 point
  7. Child support being the only remaining issue to deal with. Well don't get common law married either. It isn't magic like it just happens. I live in a common law state, there needs to be proof you are married still. You aren't going to get a room mate and you are married the next day. Why would you want joint ownership of assets? That's the point, to not have joint ownership. Hospital visitation can be assigned with power of attorney documents. Presumably if you are in a relationship the custody of the children is not an issue. You mean he tried to have a contract instead of being married OR he tried to have a contract to nullify the legal ramifications of being married?
    -1 points
  8. Say you have a net worth of $2 million, the woman thinks she is worth a $1,000,000 purchase price? Lmfao
    -1 points
  9. I always say the woman worth marrying is the one who refuses to get married due to the involvement of the government in marriage.
    -1 points
  10. Nobody is saying go monk. lol. Just not get married. My parents always say this to me... I say, I don't think I am going to get married. They say, so you don't want a girlfriend? Um yeah a girlfriend, not a piece of paper.
    -1 points
  11. If marriage comes with all sorts of legal issues, why not just not get married? I don't mean not have a relationship or even kids. If you don't get married: 1. No alimony 2. No dividing assets 3. No divorce Once your assets are protected, your girlfriend is less likely to leave you when she is the one who will have to live on her friends couch or stay at a cheap motel instead of your nice house. What is so special about marriage? It is just a commitment. How is the filing of government papers important?
    -1 points
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.