Gaurav251

I remember being like this, and its a very vivid feeling, because it felt like nothing in my life was enjoyable and the only thing that actually woke me up, or gave my nerves a good 'impulse' was the sight of violence or death. Granted I was not the type to 'endorse' violence. But I always felt that these people that watch and comment on things like this don't really care about who is beating up who, they just need a justification to make the violence not seem awful and thus worthy of being initiated. Like if you see a white man beating up a brown man, you wouldn't really 'enjoy' or 'endorse' or 'support' the persons decision on committing violence on some one else unless you were really into human hatred and psychopathic tendencies. But if there is a justification given to you such as the brown man being a grocery shoplifter, or a confirmed rapist, or something else, you will have a reason for liking that violence because you think "that's what they deserve". So I am guessing the reason that violence was endorsed is because people had the reason that "since that guy is a asshole he deserves to get beat up", and its very easy to find reasons to use violence on others. I mean I see this all the time if I ever go check up on reddit combat footage videos, day in day out real people dead bodies being blown up to dust with mostly every one looking and saying "he deserved it for being a idiot" or some other reason.

These are the important things I find in your sentences: "Our drummer is AMAZING. Top notch, absolute pro. He's hilarious to as well. He's also completely insane and a royal pain in the ass." "Recently my bass player and I finally have realized that if are to carry on at all we need a new drummer and probably a new guitarist. We've known this for years but these guys are old friends. It's really hard. We can't bring ourselves to have the conversation with them. With our drummer it will ruin the friendship." " It is almost as if I have a mental block that prevents me from being able to release the album. " Since I didn't have time today to read all of your post today, I will make assumptions of what I hear, it seems like you don't really have that much of a connection with your band because if you did you shouldn't have problems discussing important things with your drummer and I wonder if this mental block that 'stunts' or 'paralyzes' you has something to do with the trust between your band members, again only assumptions since I haven't read the whole thing and I am very tired today, I will read the rest tomorrow.

Well its all about the cost/benefit relationship right?If these people are beneficial to my life and give me comfort and happiness, sure! Why not keep them around? How ever if they are destructive and potentially crazy (thus following little to no ethics or principles) I will turn 180 degrees and separate my self from them in the easiest and shortest ways possible (how ever I would rarely even start to have a relationship with them if I see these things oozing out of their personalities). Sure that doesn't leave me a lot of friends to hang out with, but when I do find the 'right' person it is a far more enjoyable relationship for me to be in and I absolutely would not trade it for having 'more' people in my life as 'friends'.

One thing I learned about irrational people is that their arguments dont follow a pattern at all, they can switch their 'moral compass' as fast as they can do a 180 degree body turn. My greatest example is my father who says that religion gives people peace because people are naturally violent and then when I bring up Islam (because he naturally hates sunni religion because hes a hinduist) he says "that makes people violent unless they follow *insert another religion*". I think Stef said that these kinds of people are those that "even when they are check mated in a game they will not admit defeat and continue on as if the king can be lost and the game can continue with what ever pieces that person has left" in other words even if the argument is completely irrational or illogical to the point that were entering complete fantasy land stuff (dragons, mermaids, planet X that will destroy the earth one day, etc.) there is little you can do if that person is not willing to even say that he has a 1% chance of being wrong or maybe just misled. You are just going to be arguing pointlessly because you 'cant win' regardless of what you do because the game was 'rigged' from the start to make it so the only winning condition is that you lose.

"If you have a problem with the government then call your congressmen or women and tell them your feelings!" "If that doesn't work! Vote them out of office! That will teach em a lesson they will never forget!"

Sorry if I offended you, its just I haven't met a person who's hated his birthday and takes it as an insult if wished happy birthday, so in that case I was ignorant. However I will say that you must have had a depressing childhood, and I am truly sorry that you have reasons to hate the day you were born. There's a part of me saying right now that by saying what I just said is just another insult being thrown at you, and once again, I apologize if it is. But it feels like to me you didn't just make a thread about your birthday and posted a depressing poem (what it looks like to me) for 'no reason', and rather it feels like a cry for help. Again could be bull crap coming from my mouth but its just from my personal experience. I will ask this though, was there a time that you didn't hate your birthdays? Or rather when did you start hating your birthdays? You don't have to answer it but I am just curious as how it came to end up in this way.

Hmm, is there a specific reason why you hate your birthday? There are times where I just found my birthday unimportant and felt it was like any other day but I don't remember in my own life hating my birthday. Plus as to why I wish you happy birthday, wishing happy birthday's to people is pretty normal to me. I wish happy birthdays to people who say it is there birthdays at such and such date (after all its only once a year your birthday comes), it is just a kind gesture I developed while growing up, and I find it pretty normal to do so. I guess I wish people happy birthday because I expect people to do the same for me when my birthday comes.

Man I am getting so many mixed feelings from that poem, sadness, regret, despair, anger, hope, I can just go on and on. I will be very honest here, I dont know what to say to make you feel happy, and I dont even know if your feeling down. But I can at least say that you are an amazing person and a great happy birthday to you!

Yah I started doing udacity because I just like python better then java and udacity does the learning reaaallllyy slowly but thats how I like it, basically programming is something I do in the spare time instead of playing video games, and its made my days a lot more 'happier' and fun (and frustrating too!) by the way your right, I dont hate math, but man the teachers I had were people who were teaching french, english, and social studies in their other curriculums and couldn't give two cents about teaching math as they just made it look like "just another course".

This sounds way to morbidly true and resonating with whats been done to me, I might as well add:-Tell your kids its bad to swear and then scream curse words in the house everday. -Beating up your wife (my mother) in front of your son has no negative consequences and is perfectly okay if you have reasons like 'shes a whore' to tell your 10 year old kid too.

I would really like to rent a place but my mother feels 'very' strongly about buying a place as she thinks "the money is not wasted". Plus all the places here have huge rent costs with hydro and parking fees. by the way these buildings are more then 40+ years old, so even I am scared about the maintenance costs and my fears are telling me this is not good but unfortunately its not my money and there is little I can do but heed advice to my mom. Me and my mom like the place don mills because we have been living here our entire lives hence it feels comfortable here and when I ask my mother what about all these other places she says its "bad neighborhoods" and thus I am restricted to this location really. My mother also says it will be of no hindrance to me in the future and that she will be able to pay back the loan/mortgage by her self and I can keep the property after wards. It wont really be a loss for me as I am not the one who bought and paid for the place and my family already owns property in India which I can settle into at any time I want. The reason my mother wants to buy property here in Canada is so she can have a 'easy' time switch from here to India again any time she wants (gives same reason for me too). I might settle down here if the economy and job market looks good but if not I will just simply fly back to my home country and find some work there. I kind of think its a good decision but I still have a few worries about it but these are worries that wont effect me until years ahead of my life. I feel a bit of powerlessness in this decision making but I just wanted to ask the question out of the good of my conscience really, and to see if I could say anything to my mom about changing her mind.

First therapist, has 15+ years of experience being one, says he knows how to handle video game addictions, family problems, and all sorts of things fit to my category, go first session, tell him about all my problems, feelings and thoughts, listens in and after I am done says: "You need more discipline-" Instant turn off, everything after that I couldn't take seriously (and for good reason too, he was recommending I heal the relationships with my abusive father). That was the first and last session with that therapist, sucks I lost $100. After that I bought the self therapy books recommended on this forum and I can say they have a much more meaningful impact in my life.

I noticed that time has huge impacts and little value after a few years have been gone into making a relationship. In the beginning its nice to talk about interests, history, childhood, hobbies, and stuff but the thing thats stays is "Do I like this person?" or "Is this person healthy in my life?" or "Can I trust him to be there?" kind of stuff. I mean I have made friends by simply asking people for a pencil and then the ball just gets rolling from there. I have also lost them by simply starting a delicate conversation. Easy come, easy go I guess.

Hmm all good points, so me and my mom are now deciding to get something cheaper and still comfortable with around the same maintenance cost, http://www.remax-premier.ca/listings/1262302-5-parkway-forest-dr-toronto-ontario-c2725528 http://www.remax-premier.ca/listings/1242534-20-forest-manor-rd-toronto-ontario-c2698372 Been to these two places, they are ok and with a little polish will do fine.

I still have this motive that if I dont get that premium optical cable, that headset case, the astro scout backpack, and the audio warranty for a a50 headset then there will be no point purchasing it with out these things. Of course I just use my old sennheiser headset and when ever it breaks I just use tape to fix the wirings inside and it works perfectly ok, saves money and time.