ttarre

Hi all! This is a VERY sensitive question and I was quite attacked by raising it today with a friend. Today I was walking on the streets of Stockholm and I saw a homeless, a bit older, female beggar showing a sign that she has three young children in Romania to feed and is currently pregnant. Of course not knowing her story, I did explore the idea of the immorality of having children when one does not have the means to be able to give them a safe and sound upbringing. My friend said claimed that maybe she didn't have a choice, maybe she had been raped, maybe her husband forced her to have children, maybe she was a victim of her culture, maybe she didn't even write the sign or even has children etc etc. I was being characterized as very unsensitive and non-sympathetic towards her and her situation. Nonetheless, could one argue that, despite what the reasons are, it is immoral to have children when you are in this situation? Add to that, that it seemed as if she was using the fact that she was pregnant and had children as a mean to get additional charity. Again, I am totally aware of that this is a very sensitive question to approach, but I would like to get the communities take on this. I am aware of the tough situation she probably is in, but would like to isolate this situation and see it from a philosophical point of view. Thanks!

Hi David, I can relate to what you are feeling. I might not have any good answers, but I would like to share with you some of the perspectives that I have. It sounds that you are in the same process as I am in - starting everything anew, re-defining oneself, excited but terrified of what will come. For me, even if I do have my (sometimes quite severe) downs, the knowledge of being in the process (and not being stagnant) helps me deal with the feeling and fear of not having found a partner in life. Re-defining oneself with respect to values and also understanding what passions we host, in theory, will attract people that are suited for us. So, with that in the back of the mind, patience is required, but also being diligent in the self-work. I am keeping my hopes up, but I do feel as you describe at times. Keep up the good work and be out there, shine like a bright star, and the chances of attracting someone you find attractive (in a genuine way) will head towards 1.