welcometothedarksyde

Troubador, thanks for responding. I really love how you brought up the question of what I'd do if a daughter of mine came to me with this dilemma. I wouldn't want her getting HPV because a guy told her he was a virgin, or some worse STD. It can be hard being objective about my relationships when I'm infatuated and in a flurry of emotion, so I'm really grateful that a resource like the FDR community exists to give people like me a sage, 3rd party perspective.

Thanks for the advice. I'm still hurting and need time to digest what happened, so I'm going to take some months to heal and gain more self-knowledge before I put myself out there again. I really believe I dodged a bullet too. Today I finally had a chance to talk to him over the phone, and before I had the chance to break up with him, he told me he was going back to his ex-girlfriend he'd broken up with back in June. This reveals another lie he told me two days ago. When I asked him if he'd ever take his ex back, he said only if she got a job and went back to college, AND I broke up with him. And here we are... he broke up with me. I'm super thankful this bad experience happened with an online relationship as I would have felt so much worse if I'd gotten physical with him. He kept telling me how sorry he was and how he wanted to make it up to me for essentially cheating on me. I told him that before he goes back to his ex, he needs to tell her that A.) he is still in love with me (which he admitted) and B.) that he lied to me about her and being a virgin. If I were his ex, I wouldn't take him back based on that, and I told him this. That if he really feels sorry for being dishonest, that he should be willing to tell his ex about what happened between us and how he lied to me, despite the fact she very well might break up with him for that. We talked for an hour and it gave me a lot of closure knowing why I got myself in to this situation and how it all ends. I also told him to read Real Time Relationships, since he kept asking me what he could do to make it up to me. I sincerely hope his ex asks him about what happened, since he might not even tell her about our relationship and what he did to me. After all, he didn't tell me about her. She's walking in to the lion's den if she doesn't ask him anything.

I'm very close with my parents, they're still together thankfully. I spoke to them yesterday about all that has happened, and they gave me some fine advice. My dad told me to ask for an apology to see how he responds. If he focuses on my feelings and owns up to how the situation hurt me, that's where his priorities are. If he tries to backtrack and defend his lies, he's more focused on himself than the relationship. My brother and dad are FDR listeners, so I'm very thankful for that. My brother and I homeschooled ourselves in our teens, since we were unsatisfied with the curriculum offered my actual schools, even the online distance courses. I don't want my future children being taught about how all men are rapists and about the wage gap. There are so many more important things to learn for those 12 years that would leave them more employable and self-sufficient instead. As for why I want 5 kids, it's because I think it's important that intelligent, skilled, and well-off people have kids since IQ and temperament are very heritable. I find it's a shame intelligent, well-off people aren't having kids because they believe there are too many kids in the world, despite the fact these population booms are happening in lower IQ populations. I do well for myself in a career that takes a lot of work and almost in-born skill that is notoriously difficult to break in to, so whatever heritable factor led me to being successful, I want to pass on to future generations.

Generally speaking. I'd like to have at least 5 children and be a stay at home mom so I don't have to send them to daycare and so I can homeschool them. It's hard to find men who aren't 15 years older than me and want over 3 kids.

Thanks for all your advice, everyone. I especially appreciate algernon's insight in to how it was more than one lie. He told me yesterday he still sometimes thinks of his ex that he broke up with 2 months ago, and I'm at the point where I'm suspecting I'm a rebound. This is my first relationship, and I've made mistakes in trusting him and being as vulnerable as I was so soon. I'm glad since this was an LDR I didn't get physical with him, and that I found this out early. I should have asked more questions up front about his previous relationships, but since he told me he had never met any of his online girlfriends before, and that he was still a kissless virgin like myself, that they didn't count as sexual partners. He's young, about to turn 20, but that is no excuse for lying and not being honest. I'm 20, and I try my hardest to maintain honesty, forthrightness, and what I'm looking for in a man up front and throughout a relationship. I deserve a man who has the virtue of honesty and is mature enough to talk about exes, even though those might be painful memories.

I'm not Liam. I'm his sister. He let me borrow his account so I could make a post here.

Hi FDR. I'm a 20 year old woman from Canada currently dating a 20 year old man from the US. We both met online, and we're pretty early in our relationship. I met him about a month ago, and we've been together for about 3 weeks now. He's my first boyfriend, and since we're thousands of miles away, it takes quite a bit of effort to maintain, as well as a lot of trust. The reason I decided to date this guy was because we're both in to the alt-right movement, and are anti-feminist, anti-globalist, and we're both interested in getting married in our mid-20s and having at least 5 kids. He supports my goal of eventually leaving my current full-time career once I have children to become a stay at home mom, and he also supports my desire to not have PIV sex before marriage. He also supports my desire to homeschool any kids we have. Even though we've only been talking for a month, we've both fallen head over heels for each other, despite the fact we've never talked over Skype and only through text chat and swapping selfies of each other. We've spent up to 10 hours chatting with each other over Discord. He's currently in university and lives with 8 other people, so he hasn't had the opportunity to have a facetime with me since he's always being interrupted by drunk roommates. We've both told each other "I love you" and since we have so many compatibilities, both in our love of romantic gestures, and in our long-term goals and politics, it was hard not to fall in love with him. Before we started dating, I asked him the usual Stefan tells FDR listeners to ask suitors. Long-term goals, about children, how they want to raise children, their views on circumcision, discipline, schooling, as well as what his family is like, his childhood was like, and about his sexual history. He told me he had dated a few girls online, but had never met them in real life, so he was still a 100% virgin. Never even kissed anyone. I'm the same way, I've never dated anyone, so I'm still a virgin. When we were having a chat today, he let it slip that he had met one of his exes in real life back when they were dating. This then prompted the question of how it was possible that he'd met her and hadn't kissed her. He then admitted he had kissed her, and upon my asking if anything else beyond that happened, he shut down and said he was uncomfortable talking about it. This was a major red flag for me. It really broke my heart, not that he had an ex he'd slept with, but the fact he lied about being a virgin. I was contemplating breaking up with him right then and there. He told me the reason he lied was because he had only broken up with his ex of a year 2 months ago and that he felt it was "TMI". He said he wouldn't want to know about my sexual history either, and that he feels the past is in the past. He told me it wasn't personal, that he wouldn't have told any girl he's dating about his sexual past. My problem wasn't that he "didn't bring up" his sexual history, but that he lied about it. He explained that he wanted to make me feel that we'd share the experience of first kissing better if I thought I was his first too. I'm really confused as to what to do now. I consulted my brother (he's also an FDR listener) and he told me to simply take some time to think and let my feelings settle, and realize there are other good men out there I don't have to be in an online relationship with who also want to have a large, traditional family, who also want to homeschool their kids and want a homemaker wife. He told me it's good I discovered this red flag only a month in to the relationship since some people find it out 5 years after marrying someone. My boyfriend told me this is the only thing he lied about, and mainly because he doesn't like talking about past relationships. I don't know if I can trust anything he says now since this is such a big lie. But at the same time, besides this lie, we were so compatible. - Want to homeschool kids to avoid them from being indocrinated - Anti-spanking since it's cruel and ineffective - Anti-circumcusion - Pro-Trump - Want to get married in mid-20s and have at least 5 kids - Non-religious - Health-conscious and exercise regularly - Alt-right - He's going to a good university with a degree that will give him a great job - Parents are still together - We both don't smoke or do drugs like weed - Willing to wait until marriage for PIV sex (to avoid pregnancy and ensure a greater likelihood any marriage will work) He's also incredibly romantic, amiable, and just generally makes me feel like a million bucks when I speak to him. I just don't know whether he lied because he made a mistake and didn't want to hurt my feelings, or because it's a red flag he's immature and will lie again AKA I should break up with him. Before this happened, I legitimately thought this was a man I could marry. FDR, please tell this lady your thoughts. I'm really confused right now.

Carpe Dium man. I'm still a teenager and I live in this crazy world. I might not even reach 20 before the world tears itself apart. It sucks, but I've found an inbetween. Somewhere between going on with my life, and preparing for the worst. I mean you never know, We know that these economic fallacies can't go on forever, but that doesn't mean they won't go on for a little while longer. The one thing I would recommend is get to know some people, have some social capital. That'll probably go a long way in an emergency

That's a valid difference to bring up, that there is a less direct enemy. The Regressive Left is also doing much to obfuscate this further, like claiming that Islam is a race. The reasons for western inaction also go much further I think, not only is a clear target tough to find, but the mindset towards dissimilar peoples is so much different now. It's 'racist' to bring up that peoples with wildly different beliefs, allegiances, cultures, etc. aren't going to get along (in the absence of philosophy). I truly, truly hope that the western inaction ceases. If this isn't ended soon it will be ended later, however swiftly and brutally

Hey, not really a current event. However it does circle back to a current event One of my favorite Youtubers Jabzy posted this video discussing the reasons for Japanese Internment. He did not resort to "Thas Racis". I've never heard some of these fears from the time such as a "fifth pillar" formed by the civilian Japanese-American population. Tell me what you think, but there are some startling similarities with the Muslims in Europe. 'Truth about the Japanese Internment' anyone?

I love MBTI and find it hugely useful for understanding people and my life. I personally advocate visual typing where our facial and body language is indicative of the underlying cognitive processes. Self testing is pretty tough and inaccurate IMO. I don't care to share my type because it's one people type thenselves as alot, but I was visual typed that way. I was pretty surprised I was that type though, I thought I was something more like your type before I was visual typed.

Have you heard of Khan Academy? They have a website and produce Youtube videos, but not inherently for homeschooling. I'm a teenager and homeschooled myself as a bit of background.

I just watched this movie yesterday, it was amazing IMO. Something that struck me was Edward Norton's acting. His switch between a character difficult to relate to (primarily due to having emotional walls up), and one that is extremely relateable is astounding. I'm primarily talking about the difference between him before and after prison, from an exculsionary person incapable of true intimacy, to a sort of father character. I haven't had much time to sit on the meaning of the film, but it was an intense emotional film that I thoroughly enjoyed watching. However what I think I do have a grasp on is that the story is of a character's journey towards humanity. In fact the scene in which the family is at the table eating with Beverly d'Angelo's character's boyfriend, was quite relateable. Not that I related to Derrick, but I related to talking to people like that. People who seemingly can't truly be spoken to. As a sidenote, Edward Norton's build in that movie was awesome. I'm working towards something like that. Just without a shaved head and swastika

I watched the movie but haven't read the book. The most interesting part was how it was repeatedly shown that the two leads knew nothing about eachother. The simply drifted along on a neurochemical high, and it turned out that the female lead was a murderous sociopath, and the male lead just apathetic. Maybe they go into their dating more in the book, but all that the movie showed was them having sex and other such fun. They never had a conversation in that movie. Or at least not until they had been married. I think the takeaway of this movie is that without self-knowledge and understanding what appeals to us at a base level, we could be at the whims of our biology or our past. Not only was Ben Affleck's character not actively seeking to know his prospective wife, he also didn't see the writing on the walls. She was screaming endless red-flags, but he wasn't paying attention. What I learned from the movie is that evil people are constantly telling you that they're evil, you just have to listen to them.