DasCarly

I was wondering this same thing a few weeks ago when I watched my friend's one and a half year old son walk up to his mother and pucker up his lips. She happily pecked him back, and then he leaned in again...and again! Three kisses on the lips? I thought nothing out of the ordinary for the first one, but the second and third struck me as odd. She said that he has attempted to kiss little girls at the park. I don't know why, but I find it weird. I remember reaching an age where I no longer wanted to kiss my parents on the lips. It felt uncomfortable. It was never anything more than the occasional peck, but I knew I didn't want that anymore. Maybe that has something more to do with a lack of connection overall. If I felt safer and more comfortable with my parents, then I might have been more willing to kiss on the lips? It seems inconsequential in the long run, though. A few harmless pecks to show affection to your children, a caring smooch from time to time could be a great way to communicate love in relationships. However, if it's becoming uncomfortable or even beginning to feel incestual, then I'd cut it out.

Joel, I followed your link from Facebook. An incredible read, thank you for sharing. I find it fascinating that these forms of abuse are so quiet! They become delicately intertwined into everyday lives and even appear "good" on the surface. The way you compared your family photos to those of totalitarian North Korea is almost sickening... And you're right, not at all in line with the realities (or fantasies) that the individuals are experiencing daily. I bought my first journal a week ago, and have been proactively writing in it as well as making notes and recordings in my phone. Throughout my childhood and teenage years, I would destroy my journals and diaries. Reading them would feel embarrassing, and I think now that I had some sort of manager/protector trying to censor that hurt inner child. It was difficult for my inner, younger Carly to relive the painful experiences of growing up with an alcoholic father, an enabling and unfaithful mother, hearing my parents fight in the middle of the night, and never receiving the honest truth from traumatic experiences like those (just to name a few). I am working with those parts of me to achieve strength and inner peace. I am happy and proud for you, me, and everyone who is discarding the junk from our lives. How liberating it is to speak the mind!