shipod

If you appeared to be a very honest person and we had a good history together and there was no way I'd ever suspect that you'd be so mischievous then, no I wouldn't feel responsible. But if my friends said they had been screwed over by you in the past, and you really seemed creepy leading up to the baking process then I'd take responsibility for putting myself in that situation and of course I'd take responsibility for the crappy cake because I put myself in that position and I was aware of the risks.

-Terrible. The last thing I want to do is control her. So people are responsible for the choices they make but not for the outcome of those actions? I'm not using responsibility as a negative thing, and perhaps I'm using the wrong word here. I think the man at Tiananmen Square who faced down a tank would be responsible for his death if that tank were to run him over. There was a chance it wouldn't and he did a brave thing taking a stand. But does the "right" choice absolve responsibility from an immoral action? I'm really trying to get at the philosophy of it here, beyond prejudice.

Thanks for the replies. They were really helpful. So to stretch this a little further I'd like to know: 1. Can responsibility be partial or does it have to be total? 2. Can you ever be responsible for the actions of another person (partially or totally)? I told her that she can wear anything she wants but she should know how that makes me feel (worried that she may be harmed/harassed or worse). Her response was that it was the same thing as telling her she can't. (on a side note: she is a little Asian girl and we are currently living in Istanbul, Turkey together which is prominently Muslim).

Scenario: A woman wearing slutty clothes, goes into the dirtiest bar and flirts with the sleaziest looking man. She gets drunk with him, goes back to his house, flirts with him a little and things go too far. He begins to try to have sex with her, she says no, but he doesn't listen and she is raped. Background: Recently my girlfriend and I have been debating this idea of the nature of responsibility in the situations leading up to a rape occurring. It began with her stating that she should be able to wear whatever she wanted when walking down the street. I told her that I didn't want her wearing sexual things without me because that may lead to "bad things" happening to her. I said that she is free to do it, but she has to understand that there are consequences for her actions (even if that can lead to rape at the most sever level). I tried to compare it to a person walking into a bear infested forest with meat wrapped around them and being eaten by a bear, or a guy walking down a dark ally with $100 hanging out of his pockets and getting robbed. At this point she told me that I am comparing apples and oranges and that a woman who is raped "never has any responsibility" for putting herself in that situation. Question: 1. Does the woman have any responsibility for the rape occurring? 2. If she does have a responsibility, can her actions here, or in any other scenario ever take away responsibility from the offender? 3. Does this mean I am telling her that she/women in general cannot wear whatever they want? Thoughts?