Awood90

Thank you for replying. Your perspective in my opinion is well beyond your years and I really enjoyed reading your points. I agree I need to define friendship for myself as I feel like I do not have a good definition of it, hence my google searching landing me on this Psychology Today article. When I posted my question I was in a really depressed place with a specific "friend" of mine in mind, and funny you mention the pregnancy aspect because I am pregnant and while at first she was excited she claimed, now she is completely ignoring me. I believe I have come to the realization that she is not a "true" friend. But I still find myself wondering if people have "true" friends. My post was more a desperate cry for some pointers on what other FDR listeners are employing in the world of friends. I have plenty of acquaintances as I am a kind and outgoing person but I have a hard time nailing down what they add to my life. I wonder if I ostracize everyone who doesn't meet my standards if I will forever have no real friends. Sometimes I wonder about the people Stef calls his friends, and whether or not they are perfect matches or what he lets slide.... He sort of did a call in show about this recently which I also found very informative. I think core values are the most important aspect in friends as they are in my marriage with my wonderful husband. It appears I will just have to endure this loneliness one more year until we can set down roots. Luckily he has been offered a position in the home office which means we will no longer be moving every 8-12 months. It is a good time as I said we are expecting our first born in August. I will continue to wonder though about the coworkers and spouses who continue to move around as that is simply the way the pipeline industry is. I had this idea that a true friendship would not be hindered by distance but perhaps that is yet just another myth I think has been promoted by nonjudgmental society. After all I know my marriage would not survive long distance for a long or frequent period of time, but lots of people sure give it a try. In response to the other replies: In retrospect I realize my question was pretty "basic" but I can assure you I am no pro in philosophy or logic. I am an emotional woman, who is currently a homemaker and soon to be a stay at home mom. I realize once I have my first child things will change a bit in the friend aspect of my life as I wont have near as much time to think about being lonely. But I also know I am the kind of person who needs friends. I assume my requirements for friendships will change when I become a mother but I still don't want to settle for just chatting with other moms I have no core values in common with. It makes sense that no one has superb advice for how a gypsy can make good friends since our lifestyle is rather rare. Many of the wives of my husband's coworkers stay back in their hometowns with the kids while the husband goes to another state for months at a time to build pipelines. They have their kids in public school so they don't travel with their husbands very often and they have their family and "support system" because they have roots. Seeing my husband for the weekend maybe once a month at the most and usually less did not sound appealing to myself or my husband so for 3 years I have traveled from state to state with him and our doggies. As I have grown I have purged all the friends I had my hometown and my younger life which I feel is the large reason for the feeling of having "no friends". In reading y'alls comments I feel I should count myself lucky having made one good friend over the course of these 3 years the only catch is that she circumcised her son and doesn't share our views on peaceful parenting. Anywho... thanks for your replies. Sorry for the basic inquiry.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fighting-fear/201401/what-expect-friend Can I get some FDR listener perspective on this article? I mean... I am desperately searching for answers here. I have none of these so called "true friends".. Do they exist? Are my standards too high? I have whittled down my group of friends to a sharp point since becoming an FDR listener and I still feel like none of them embody what I expect out of a "true friend". On top of nixing old friends, we move constantly for my husband's job so making new friends has been at the very least a challenge. Do you have friends for different occasions? Do you keep people in your life who are good to shop with but not good at the dinner table? Is this article complete nonsense? I am at a loss here..... What is reasonable to expect from an adult friendship? How do I find a community when every 6-12 months I move to a new state? FACKKK!!!