ShutterLake

My thoughts on MGTOW: For me, MGTOW is the right-wing equivalent of a man's safe space. Quit being a baby and try to become a quality mate (blanket statement not directed at any one person here)... And don't say you already are, because I really doubt it as there is ALWAYS room for improvement. Also running from your problems is a trait of low-quality mates... It's beta. So by definition, being an MGTOW guy, you are a low-quality mate who doesn't deal with their issues. Maybe that is why you only attract low-quality women to the point you want to eject from the game altogether. The quality women could detect you are MGTOW before you even went your own way. Finding quality is hard... and it should be, that's what makes quality... So is it sustainable? No, I don't think so. Again, none of these statements are being directed to any individual.

Thanks for the warm welcome and thanks for the cudos! My wife and I can't find anyone around is physically who thinks like us, so it's nice to be able to at least connect with others through here. Glad to be here! Stef's work has literally changed my life. It was like the ultimate light bulb moment where I was able to stitch together all of my experiences to really understand myself, but more importantly, the world around me. Yes, I have and I hate to say, but I agree with you that people rarely change. If you look at my reply in this post I touch on it a bit. Unfortunately, life was rough to me in the beginning and I have learned that the only person who can change is me, and the only one likely to change is also me.

Mother: "Son please don't tell anyone I was molested" Son: *Tells entire internet his mom was molested* Not saying this is a laughing matter, it was low hanging fruit, and making jokes has always been my way to lighten the conversation when talking about really heavy shit (I know Stef hates it so I have tried stopping for the most part, like I said, low hanging fruit). My mother was also molested as a child, and she never talked to me about it or admitted it until after I told her about how I was sexually abused starting in the 1st grade. My sister was also sexually abused in middle school (she has yet to confront my parents about this). When I was dealing with all of this in therapy, I really draw a lot of parallels between my behavior, and the behavior of those around me, including the people who sexually abused me. One of the guys who did it was very violent and would go into crazy rages when things didn't go his way. This rubbed off on me in the way that I wouldn't be violent towards other people, but I would be violent towards my self once I was alone(Hit my self in the head, other weird stupid shit) and I would be in a rage, I just always made sure I was alone. Your mom, like mine, is avoiding all responsibility as a parent. My mom was molested for 10 years in her home, and she doesn't think her parents are responsible in any way... totally fucking mind-blowing. I was sexually abused around 1st grade and it went on for a year and a half, and she and my dad think they have no responsibility (wish I could say I was shocked, but I am not as their genes were trying to reproduce the same way they were created) and in fact, they have said it was actually my fault because I didn't tell them until I was an adult. Nevermind the fact they obviously created an environment where I was too scared to tell them for fear of what they might do. Anyways, I guess what I am trying to say is, it's really hard to get adults to take responsibility for their actions, especially if they were really bad, and they have been able to pretend nothing happened for a really long time. Chances are you are fighting a battle that you will not win. All you can do is say your piece, establish your boundaries/rules of engagement going forward in the relationship and go from there.

So my wife and I have a 1-year-old, and we practice peaceful parenting. And one of the biggest things that stuck with us from all these different things we have heard is the idea that you should never sacrifice the integrity, security, comfort, etc. of a child for the comfort of adults. And my god does this pisses our families off! They always say we are so rigid that we won't keep him up later because THEY want to go to dinner at an unreasonable time. We always say, change the time to better fit our son's schedule and we will be there, but we are not going to make him cranky by keeping him up 2 hours past his bedtime so you can have the luxury of seeing him. If you want to see him, fit into HIS schedule, we will not make him fit into YOUR schedule. Or they say that we are unreasonable that we don't want to drive 45 minutes in traffic to see his aunt for an hour just to turn around and drive all the way home, especially when he hates being in the car for long periods of time. Or they will say we are lame because we don't want to load him up and go sit as some bar so they can drink all day and be around him (not sure why they even think this makes sense, but nevertheless, this is how they react). The list of weird shit they get pissed about goes on and on... So why do you guys think adults get so pissed off when you start putting the integrity, comfort, and security of your child before their own comfort?