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  1. I just watched the "How Feminism Destroyed Europe." I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I can't stop thinking about it and I'm wondering why something like a peaceful conversation could make me feel so anxious and upset. I came from a very conservative religious household. My ACE score was 4 and I absolutely hated my parents. I remember wishing, at 12years old, for my father to die in a car crash because I was tired of being hit with a belt, berated, and screamed at. My mother was pretty much the same as him only not nearly as frightening to me. As an adult, she is just as much at fault for being a horrible person to bring me into this world to be a trash bin for their insecurities and frustrations to be dumped into. Needless to say, I have problems with self confidence and being certain of anything. These days, I start to seethe with anger, contempt, and frustration when I hear someone extol the virtues of their unproven faiths. I can't stand listening to someone talk about the virtues of faith and how secularism leads to death and destruction. I am not the kind of atheist who enjoys making fun of religious groups nor do I feel like I scream at other people who are religious. But, this visceral anger rages inside of me. I'm sure it comes from my childhood and the people that abused me as a child and made me feel like crap. At the same time, I know that not all of Christianity and other peaceful religions aren't inherently evil. But these are the people that said "god is good, god is love, Catholics are the beacon of truth and light in the world," and all the while making me feel like I was worthless and evil. What must I do to overcome this? I get that video is about waking Europe up and trying to turn back the tidal wave of blood that will expunge all that western civilization has fought and died for. How can I subdue this anger or help it find its real target?
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