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Hi everyone. A short introduction so we understand the context of my situation. I have a Cousin who I have a relatively close relationship to. I don't speak to him that often, but when we do talk, we talk about relatively deep subjects regarding philosophy, our upbringing and how it affects our development and similar topics. He studying for his masters degree in Social work, so he's come across various studies on child abuse and spanking, so he has some knowledge of the subject. He will become a father this coming august, and has expressed to me that he believes , despite the evidence he has come across, that spanking his son as a disciplinary action will be appropriate. He attempts to justify it in two ways. that he will not use an object to assist in spanking, as studies have shown that increases the risk of trauma to the child. His second point is that he believes that "you cannot have respect without fear." I know there are plenty of arguments against spanking that Stefan makes, backed up with research papers and the like. I was interested in hearing thoughts on the Idea of fear and respect, since that is a less discussed topics on his shows. his recent video " how to accept criticism" mentions towards the end that fear an respects are opposites. I want to explore positions on this concept so that I can help influence my cousin's opinion on the matter and dissuade him from spanking his child. I'm aware that he is ultimately the only one who can change his mind, but I figured that its worth a shot. any help on the matter would be greatly appreciated.

I am having trouble dealing with a friend I am currently displeased with. So me him and a couple others agreed months ago that we would meet up every other week on sunday to hang out. One of my other friends organizes it so I will call him person A. The person I am displeased with is person B. So the day rolls around and person A reminds person B that we are meeting up a day in advance, person B responds that he made plans (going to a show) over the plans. Person A says ok in a not so happy way but lets it go. I ask person B why he has no respect for person A's time or the rest of the group, he made a verbal agreement with us and did not keep to it so isn't his words now just useless? For the record there was no family emergency, no one was dying this was a "I said I'd go but by that I REALLY meant I would go if another better offer does not come along". From how I see it all I am doing is calling him on his B.S. and his lack of empathy for person A's time. I wanted him to not be dishonest with his agreements and standards. He of course gets mad and thinks its no problem at all but I was pretty adament that this is all based on principles, this is far past our group of friends. This is him showing NO respect for his own agreements or his friends. What do you guys think? Do I just have a stick in my butt or is it fair to want my friends to have some standards and hold to their agreements they made? -Jeremy