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I’m currently working on overcoming a powerful emotional response I have when it comes to asserting my own preferences. My problem is I don’t. When I attempt to I hit a wall of fear that leads me to staying quite or not participating. I’m currently in therapy and I've figured out where it comes from. I’m just not sure the best way to work through it. The problem comes from early childhood where I learned not to put fourth my own preferences as this would result in abusive behavior from my mother. One of three things happened when I put forth a preference. One, my mother would get angry and yell at me. Two, she would attack what I put forth as a desire. Three, if it was with other people she would make me feel insecure about going to the point that I would say I don’t want to go. What I've found that has helped in the past is re-imaging scenarios placing myself in there as an adult and defending myself from her. I've grown comfortable doing this. What I’m having difficulties doing is imagining myself asserting my preferences. I think the fear I experiences is abandonment and rejection. My mom threatened us a few times with taking us to an orphanage and leaving us there. With me and my younger siblings she acted like she was calling the orphanage. With my older siblings my parents drove downtown at night and told them to get out of the car. They said they were going to drive off and leave them if they didn't behave. I’m wondering if anyone has any suggestions on way that might help me work through this.