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I am the proud and loving auntie of a 9-month-old niece and more than anything, I do not want harm to come to her...especially not at the hands of her own parents. Unfortunately, her mother (my husband's sister) has decided to have the baby's ears pierced tomorrow afternoon. I've accepted that it's going to happen no matter how much I know it violates the NAP. I used to work at a store that pierces ears and I, sadly, pierced many a baby girl's ears while I worked there, so I've seen firsthand that babies cry very hard when it happens to them and it is quite obviously painful and confusing for them. It's appalling that this happens just to appease some self-centered desire for aesthetics on the part of the parents. My sister-in-law does not know that I believe piercing the baby's ears is totally unethical and she wouldn't understand why if I told her (she's a fundamentalist evangelical Christian, so reason is not very popular with their family). She really wants me to come out with her, my niece, my other sister-in-law, and my mother-in-law as a big "girls' afternoon out" to get my niece's ears pierced tomorrow. I do not know what to tell her. She knows I don't have plans and that I'm available, but the prospect of telling her flat out "I don't support your violence against your daughter and I don't feel like going out to celebrate it" just doesn't seem realistic. But I also can't see myself ooh-ing and ah-ing over my screaming, crying niece's newly pierced/red/swollen earlobes along with everyone else; I feel like I would stick out like a sore thumb since I wouldn't be able to bring myself to agree with everyone how "cute" she looks with earrings. I've tried deterring her from it by describing my many experiences with red-faced, screaming, tearful infants who've just had holes punched in their bodies, but that has not changed her mind. My brother-in-law (my niece's father) won't even accompany everyone because he doesn't want to see his daughter cry like that (what a coward). What should I do? Should I tell my sister-in-law I'm not going with them on principle? Or should I just suck it up and go along to be with my niece since I know it's going to happen whether I agree with it or not?