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Showing results for tags 'dysfunctional families'.
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I have been taking care of my sisters kids for about 9 months while she has been in Rehab.. I am living at my mothers house during this time. My mother is a savage beast and an alcoholic. She takes no responsibility whatsoever for my sister being in Rehab. If I stay here much longer I am going to lose my mind. I want to help these poor kids who have been born into chaos. I have made the case over and over with my mother about the practicality of using time outs and yelling and the fact that it just makes things worse in the long run. I have sent her multiple links to articles and books explaining this. If I talk to her in person she just laughs at me saying something like "they need to learn they can't always have their way" She accuses me of "just letting them do whatever they want". The reality is she wants the kids to be broken so she can force them to do whatever she wants. She literally just a few moments ago put the little girl in time out because she wanted to wear her recital dress. My mother tricked her into giving her the dress by saying she was helping her take off the dress so she could go to the bathroom. But afterwards my Mother wouldn't give it back. So of course the little girl started crying and asking for it back. Because this behavior bothers my mother she picks up the little girl while she is still screaming and puts her in her room and locks the door. The little girl sobs and cries pressed up the door begging to be let out.. I am living in a nightmare. Not only am I stuck with this fucking beast of a person but I am powerless to protect the children from her. If I try to intervene she will go psychotic screaming and yelling at me threaten me insult me, she is capable of anything. I want them to have a chance in life and I am worried that I am just sealing their fate by being a part of all this. I am 100% committed to virtue and of course peaceful parenting, my mother is the exact opposite she just wants to get her way at any cost(so long as she can't get in trouble for it) I have recently come to accept the definition of the word sociopath to describe her, I could write a whole book on the horrors she has forced me to endure in childhood. The children have a strong bond with her and I worried that I am just making it stronger by tending to their wounds so she can rip them open again.. I want these kids to be able to identify monsters like this and avoid them not "love" them. I plan on moving out with the next 6 months but what then? I don't see any way of getting her out of my life so long as I am in the kids life. And when my mother is in my life I don't exist I am a just a chew toy for her insatiably sadistic appetite. Right now I am easily startled by noises, if I see my mom moving fast out of the corner of my eye I tense up and prepare for an attack. I am stressed to the point where its effecting my health. I am exhausted all the time. Anytime I am around her I feel nauseous. Its extremely difficult for me to be vulnerable and connected with the children around my mother, I can't be myself with them when she is lurking over my shoulder. Am I doing more harm then good by giving them this model even tho I am relatively able to give them the model I want when she is away Mon-Fri 6am-5pm?
- 6 replies
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- child abuse
- drug abuse
- (and 3 more)