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This is an incredibly long story but here it goes in a nutshell. I met my girlfriend over five years ago on a penpal website to practice Spanish. She contacted me first and we have been friends and subsequently lovers later. Even though I wanted just to practice, I couldn't help falling in love her-someone who was 3,000 miles away on a different continent. . . Even though I love her, our culture has such a stigma associated with the internet and meeting people. For some people it's seen as dangerous and there's a 99% chance that the other person is just there to take advantage of you or whatever. I'm sure that's true for some cases but people's irrationality in this sphere amounts to huge social pressures. In addition, I've heard comments such as "mail order" and other thoughtless remarks. Again this is just a classic case of two friends becoming something more since all we had were our words (at first). In addition, I always have felt like a prisoner in my society and culture. I had very few good friends I could confide with and my interests and hobbies were not shared by many. Also I felt like I could never really be who I wanted to be and felt repressed from so many directions. With her I was able to open up and not feel judged or shamed or anything. It was a freeing experience and was transcendental for me. I knew after just a few months that this was the right person for me even though we had never actually met. To continue, after a year I finally manned up and went to see her and her family. To my friends/classmates I just simply told them that I was going on an exchange program while my family more or less knew the general truth (not all the details). When my mom noticed that things were getting serious, she began using a lot of fear/police tactics (as was not uncommon in my high school days) such as intercepting our letters and reading them which mortified me to know that my privacy had been so abused. On numerous occasions she tried to bar me from going using things like pregnancy risk or that they were going to "kidnap" me or whatever. This just added to my anxiety and general unhappiness. This and other social pressures relating to internet dating still create great fear and anxiety in me. I have a good friend or two that know the truth and accept it (I trust them 100% because I know they won't judge me) but others I dread telling them anything. When asked I literally go into flight or fight mode since I feel so embarrssed over how we met. I hate going to social events where I know someone might ask. To finish, she is coming over for Christmas (her second time ever coming). When she came in the summer it was literally just us and a few friends in town. With Christmas there are so many people in town and old classmates especially that I'm now honestly dreading to confront many people since I feel embarassed. Are my fears irrational? I've tried reasoning them out and what not and know we've done nothing wrong. However, people's irrationality, etc I feel drives a lot of social pressure: "I'm not sure there's a god but going to church is expected and I don't want to appear as bad." "Meeting people on the internet is just plain weird. I've seen that tv show were pedophiles get baited to molest a minor, etc". I know she and we deserve better. I think she's just wonderful and it pained me so much to tell her I was embarrassed about how we met. I think that upset her too since she thinks I'm wonderful and the greatest thing that has happened to her. I want to give her a 100% here and not be upset or scared because I fear these encounters. I know there are no positive rights to anything. So am I justified in saying that even though these social stigmas are driven by irrationality, I just want to enjoy the three weeks that she's here and just be/see people I feel comfortable with and gain pleasure from seeing? Or am I just being childish by not wanting to have to face the same (embarassing) question time and time again which honeslty cause me some shame, etc. If I'm being irrational/childish is the truth deserving? Or is a plain "we met while on vacation" or something sufficient? Thanks for taking the time to read this and respond. I'll be more than happy to follow up if you have any follouw up questions or are in need of clarification.