Guest Upthedownescalator Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 Hi guys What do you all think of this therapy approach? I ask because I have booked a few sessions to help with my anxiety, depression, negativity, ambivalence, procrastination, father issues and the fact that I am twenty three without having ever kissed a girl. This will be my first therapy session, will it be appropriate? Is it important which type of therapy I do? Thanks for any input and advice you can give. Charlie
cherapple Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 Did you just look this up and book these sessions today? You were the one asking about therapy methods during the Sunday show, and I suggested this? This is the type of therapist I am working with, in conjunction with doing the parts work of Internal Family Systems therapy. My therapist is certified in sensorimotor therapy, but not IFS, although she knows enough about it to talk about parts with me. My first session with her was incredibly powerful, but I'm still resistant to doing the body work, and I want to stay in my head talking about my system in an intellectual way. Personally, the fact that I am working with an in-person therapist who *sees* me — and by that I mean sees me in physical form and draws attention to things I'm doing with my body and what it might mean — is a huge step for me. Up until this point, I had only worked with therapists over Skype (since FDR, prior to which I had refused to see a therapist for ten years because I didn't know how to find a good one) because just existing in voice was so anxiety producing. I broke down in the very first session and cried in front of my therapist, which was huge. I arrived to my first session late, so the first session was only a half hour. But I felt seen in a way that I've never felt seen before. One of the first things she said to me was, "You don't have to tell me your whole history because I can see it in your body." I want to cry with relief now just remembering the experience. It's not that I don't want to talk about my childhood history because I do, and we do. But having someone see my history as my body remembers it and expresses it took the enormous weight off my shoulders of having to explain myself and retell my whole story yet again. (She is my fourth therapist since FDR.) I highly recommend it for the healing integration of the whole system—emotional, intellectual, and physical. Cheryl
cherapple Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 To be more specific, it wasn't the enormous weight of having to explain myself that was lifted, but the enormous weight of a lifetime of feeling invisible. The enormous frustration of being erased, of not being allowed to exist, of being made invisible by my parents and everyone around me when I was a child ... was gone in that one sentence where my therapist said, "I see you."
cherapple Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 I am twenty three without having ever kissed a girl. When you are able to exist for yourself, you will be able to exist physically for a woman.
Lowe D Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 I'm not sure about making more than one appointment, before you've seen the therapist. Establishing trust was difficult for me to do in therapy, and I don't think I would have been comfortable in committing to any length of time, early on. Something I want to add is that you aren't broken. There isn't anything wrong with you. You made it this far in life, which is farther than a lot of people make it, and clearly you were going uphill all the way. I think, probably you don't have father issues, but just a crap dad. I think, probably you aren't negative and depressed, just more self aware than average.
Guest Upthedownescalator Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 Hi Cheryl Yes someone on the chat room suggested IFS I guess it was you, sorry forgot who I have not quite booked it yet, she will get back to me. So is sensorimotor therapy a part of IFS? I'm glad you were able to find such relief with the therapy, what exactly were your issues if you don't mind me asking? I worry that I have developed fake body language to hide any cues along with a false-self that has been fading since but I still catch myself with narcisistic thoughts. Any advice on body language should I just relax, be comfortable or put on my normal social image? What if I am no longer seeable? I also worry that my 'problems' are not worthy of therapy but I guess Stef recommends it to everyone. As for the girl problems, I'd just like to clarify that, while I can't deny I Have a burning biological desire for a relationship, it is more the expectations of the people around me that gives me anxiety. If they could see a big floating "V" above my head then they would surely think I was strange. Anyway thanks for making me look forward to this a little bit, really thanks
Guest Upthedownescalator Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 Hi Lowe D Thanks for the comforting words. I've not yet booked them, waiting to hear from her when she can sort them, so I'll bear your advice in mind
Recommended Posts