saveyourself1 Posted January 14, 2013 Posted January 14, 2013 http://www.wellbeingalignment.com/emotional-pain.html my compassion, love and attention right now?
saveyourself1 Posted January 14, 2013 Author Posted January 14, 2013 I felt nervous posting this asking for phone numbers. I think I felt nervous because I was scared if somebody was going to get mad at me for asking for phone numbers, or call me names, or tell me i need to just post my answers here, etc. I felt the need to defend myself and possibly not even make this post at all - because I didn't want to be "attacked", because I would experience great discomfort with the possible disapproval. I feel guilty for creating something that someone else might not approve of or like that would then not be my friend and consider me a loser or something I think the part of me most that needs my lovin' is my little inner child asking to taken care of and protected from bullies. I have denied what I feel because it was convenient, I'd forget, some times I wouldn't but I'd think there's no other way, thinking or feeling these things is strictly prohibited, because then these same people your scared of know why your scared of them and can exploit you further. I haven't been willing to see that I am valuable, and that others opinion and wants, needs, preferences aren't my priority. There is a convening of sorts on the forums here, but I'm apart of this community, and yea I'm not a current donator unfortunately, but I put my time in here and I think I owe it to myself to make this thread if I so choose. If somebody else doesn't like it or doesn't want it, then they can tell me, perhaps offer me criticisms or suggestions, or move on, or make their own thread and show me an example of a better way to do this. There are pleanty of options, and if virtually nobody wants this post up, they can just have it removed, or a moderator can warn me about this, or I can get a low rating on my post so not many will bother wasting their time. This is voluntarism, not family, dysfunction, abuse, wretched emotional empovershment - this is a site, and category of this site, for personal development; or, self-knowledge. Reflection..It felt robotic going through that, those things are true, but it's like I'm still not getting to them. This is why I think counseling is so much more important then simply writing and playing this self-knowledge thing solo, at least for my case, as I've been pretty significantly emotionally abused. I would really like to discuss these questions and go through stuff like this with others in this community. If anyone has a way of getting the message out there to any others interested in the same topics, please forward them this thread. If they have not signed up for FDR (get them to sign up!), then if you could personally message me and I'll give you my number to give to them. I really look forward to talking to ya'll, and aw heck, here's my # 1-386-847-2930.. What's the worst that could happen? name's Anthony.
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