NigelW Posted April 15, 2013 Share Posted April 15, 2013 I am somewhat confused by this feeling. If anyone has any thoughts to share, it would quite useful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysterionMuffles Posted April 15, 2013 Share Posted April 15, 2013 What is it about yearning that confuses you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NigelW Posted April 15, 2013 Author Share Posted April 15, 2013 I have a yearning feeling whenever I think about my parents. They were incredibly cold. I guess that I'm wondering what purpose it serves when I don't see any possibility of a relationship with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darknova Posted April 16, 2013 Share Posted April 16, 2013 When you say they were 'cold', what do you mean specifically? I'm guessing emotionally distant/unavailable? I think that this yearning is a pretty natural result of a lack of emotional closeness and connection as a child. Connection is extremely important in our early lives. It seems from what you wrote that you received none/little of this connection, and I think that could easily lead to a yearning for it cause it's a deep void that was never filled. Let me know if anything I've said is off base. If you really did never get that connection as a child, you have my deepest sympathies. That's a pretty terrible thing to withold from a child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NigelW Posted April 16, 2013 Author Share Posted April 16, 2013 I think you were very accurate because I felt sad when I read your post. This has given me a lot to journal about. Thank you for your sympathy and insight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darknova Posted April 16, 2013 Share Posted April 16, 2013 Have you listened to podcast 2322 where Stef interviews Dr Faye Snyder about Reactive Attachment Disorder? There's great discussion in there about the role of emotional and physical attachment in early childhood that may help provide you with some answers and (likely) more questions to mull over. Either way, it's some great through provoking material, and helped me view some things differently in my own past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NigelW Posted April 16, 2013 Author Share Posted April 16, 2013 I may have missed that one. I will give it a listen. Thanks again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysterionMuffles Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 Let us know if it provides you with immense insight or if you need more guidance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NigelW Posted April 17, 2013 Author Share Posted April 17, 2013 It's given me an enormous insight into my childhood, which seems to have been perfectly described in the podcast. I feel somewhat lost, though. It's a disorientating feeling, like I'm not worth anything. That somehow therapy will not be able to change anything and I'll be stuck in an eternal pit of despair and stagnation. I know that I can climb out, but I'm having trouble finding the rope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysterionMuffles Posted April 18, 2013 Share Posted April 18, 2013 Ah yes I could understand that there may be a part of you that will want to resist therapy. That's just your inner critic wanting to keep you small. I'll provide you with another podcast that I found pretty helpful when it comes to understanding that resistance. 1149 Inner Critic Roleplay is a very helpful conversation I listened to in understanding the dichotomy of our self esteem. It's definitely worth the listen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darknova Posted April 18, 2013 Share Posted April 18, 2013 Morse Code Stutters: thanks for mentioning that podcast. I had missed it, and self esteem and self criticism are things I've been struggling to bring under control for a while now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NigelW Posted April 18, 2013 Author Share Posted April 18, 2013 This was so helpful. I find I have a resistence to success which usually leads to self-sabotage. But I can see the similarities. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts