LucasV Posted April 20, 2013 Posted April 20, 2013 Hi everyone. I had a pretty intense dream 2 nights ago night and I wanted to share it here and ask for your feedback, insights and thoughts and anything else about it. The version I pasted below is mostly an unedited text version of the dream that I typed out at around 4 o'clock pm the day after I had the dream. I also typed up a more in depth version a bit after that, but I think that longer version might have more interpretation in it as well so I chose this version for purity. After the text of the dream, I wrote some context from my life to give a better idea where the dream might be coming from and feel free to read it first if you like although it also pretty interpretive. I also have some interpretations for the dream but I don't want to taint people's perception of the dream too so I tried to leave that out while trying to still provide relevant details. The dream is pretty long but I think it is fairly exciting and interesting. Also this is like the 480 or 720p version, so if anyone has any questions or would like more details please ask and I will do my best to accurately recall and elaborate on anything that I can. Also I can post the more detailed and possibly tainted version that I typed up after this one if anyone is interested. The dream- The dream sort of started with me and Stef sleeping in my bed and then me waking up and going to the counter and there being a weird contraption that Looked like a flip video camera but it had all sorts of long, thin plastic pieces coming off of it, making it look sort of like one of those stick bugs but plastic and modern looking, but quite large, maybe each plastic arm was about 1 ft. long. So I am trying to figure out what it is and what it's purpose is when Stef wakes up behind me and explains that it is basically like his inhaler. I then sort of imagine an regular looking asthma inhaler and ask Stef if that is what he means. I don't think I say it out loud but Stef understands what I mean. During this time I am sort of thinking of Stef as my little brother or something, I feel a sort of love and admiration for him but at the same time I am very afraid that I will cause him harm by saying or doing something wrong. We talk a little bit more and my anxiety about the situation grows, that I might do something to Stef so I decide to leave the house to prevent that and the next thing I know I am in a city, a dream interpretation of Chicago, and I end up am going into a big fancy looking building. Once inside the building there is a group of people sort of hanging out in a big open well lit fancy marble type room. It seems like it is some kind of foyer and occasionally other people pass through and they are commonly very beautiful and attractive and fancily dressed women and if I look at them they smile. In the dream I think to myself that they are smiling just because I am good looking. So my attention goes back to the other people in the room who seem I guess a bit socially awkward and slightly listless. After sitting there for a bit wondering what to do exactly this big beefy guy with what looks like beard stubble for a haircut gets angry about something and kicks a smaller weaker person in the nuts. At that point I think that I am pretty tall and can be intimidating if I try to be and I might be able to stop this guy with that combined with the power of my character or personality or something as well. I tell him to stop somewhat loudly, and he looks at me and says something like 'trying to be a hero?' or some other snide aggressive remark. I don't acknowledge what he says but I realize he is much stronger and heavier than me so I keep my distance. Then he comes towards me and his accomplice or someone else, it's not exactly clear who or what it is, but they climb on my back and hold my arms down and wrap their arms and legs around me so I am kind of immobile. I cant run or walk really but I am still standing up. The big stubbly cruel guy is in front of me. Then I am briefly completely distracted by the thought that all the pretty well dressed ladies could help me and stop this, but somehow I know they won't. Then I am told by the meathead to go up a set of stairs onto a deck that is over the foyer we were in before. This meathead is getting ready to punch me in the face and I start saying I was just standing up for non aggression, for non violence and for not hurting people in a somewhat pleading but also calm way. He laughs at me and says I look and sound like a stupid hipster and then he brings up some movie he watched and was comparing this situation to the movie, wanting me to laugh at the connection. In a cold and degrading or disdainful way I say 'no, I have never heard of that movie' and won't go along with his story. He then leaves and the person/thing on my back doesn't let go right away but starts to greasily slide down my back and excretes some kind of oily yellow urine/puss substance. As this is happening, I think in my head someone is asking why I haven't left yet and I say because of this. Then I go back downstairs with a sense that I need to run, but also a fear of running due to the meathead possibly catching me or something. I notice a little ways past the atrium there is an indoor restaurant full of fancily dressed pretty looking ladies and they sort of look at me and smile at me. I am flattered and intrigued and tempted but part of me knows it isn't real and isn't going to be satisfying. There is also a sense that the meathead will be back soon. I then flee the building and start running away. I get to a place where I have to cross several fast and large roads and I make sure to wait for the walk sign and as I am crossing the walk sign abruptly runs out and I am forced to run and I am almost hit. Then the post spits out a ticket that lands in the street and somehow someone tells me that I have to go get it and pay it for not crossing fast enough. I feel ambiguous about the legitimacy and effectiveness of this system. After being rushed across the street I ended up on a grassy median in the middle of two busy roads. A white van rolls up and people tell me to get in quickly, but they sound friendly and helpful so I get in. It is full of a few 18-20year old girls and then are really friendly and happy and stuff. I think maybe this is where I should be going now but I don't know what is going on really. I ask a few questions and I find out I am on a shuttle for Northwestern University. I decide to lie and play along and say I am a student there and stuff because I don't want to be dropped off somewhere random. The conversation turns to school ID cards and I almost get caught in the lie because i say they look cool, but I save myself by saying compared to like small community colleges or something, and i feel like a douche because I don't want to be perceived as elitist or something like that and i also don't want to get caught. I then see that the ID cards have buttons like a remote control along the top that a girl seems to indicate control the van. We then arrive at the school and I guess it looks nice enough but its industrial looking, sort of like what the back entrances and support buildings of a hospital or a big business might look like. At this point I press the buttons on an ID card and a black computer window pops up covering the side of the van and it says "location unknown" or with a question mark in a circle like an error message or something. I then go to a nearby office that seems like admissions or reception or something and then decide to tell the people the truth about my situation. I am expecting annoyance or anger from the lady, but after she hears my story, that I don't really go to school here and that I go to school somewhere else, she just laughs and acts like its no problem just a small mistake. Then a girl from the bus comes in and starts talking about languages like French or something. I feel like I should entertain whatever it is she is talking about and I try to speak a little French to her. She then tries to speak but is very slow so I make some sort of remark trying to calling her out on her ability and she gets really hurt and I feel like I have done something terrible, and that I won't be able to fit in here because something about me is going to show through and I cant stop it and it will cause a lot of damage here and hurt people and be unacceptable. I self attack strongly at this point and then I feel stuck here, somehow I know the van wont be taking me back out and the reception lady won't help either. Then I woke up. The context is that I fell asleep after listening to about half of FDR podcast 1038 - Grandiosity_Listener. Also the city in the dream, Chicago, is where I am going in about 5 days where I will be taking a coding course. Before the program I am stopping at my parents (and siblings) house for 2 days to pick some things up and see the FOO (not looking forward to my parents, my siblings somewhat) and I will also be stopping at my Uncle's house outside of Boston for another 2 days before I fly to Chicago. (at the time of the dream I didn't know much about what was happening in Boston, except for seeing some headlines that I ignored). Finally, I am enrolled at a traditional university where I was studying economics(the school is probably as pro-gov and keynsian as you find) and I left for a year but I am keeping the option open to return in the fall, perhaps to just take some computer science classes. Also my mother is somewhat strongly suggesting that I should go back and get a degree in economics. Also, for the programming course, it is possible to get a job afterwards as a junior developer, but maybe only 5-15% of the class will get jobs, and I haven't been doing the pre-work and I am still looking to finalize a good priced/located apartment with good roommates. Also I have been doing IFS therapy 1-2 times a week for about 8 weeks now. My basic interpretation of the dream the next day after I wrote it down and analysed it a bit. I think that it was a warning about where my life could be going, and I decided that I really needed to make sure to not let my life turn out in a bad way and that I should share the dream and see what people think to help me figure out what to do and how to avoid a bad outcome like being stuck in that situation at the end of the dream. I also experienced a lot of anxiety and worry about the scene with Stef because I feel like it seemed to be that it shows me and my relationship to Stef and or philosophy as problematic in some way. Any insights or thoughts, feedback, insights, advice, or questions about the dream and/or my situation are much appreciated I wrote and re-wrote and previewed and edited this post for probably around 2 hours or more not including the dream, both out of neuroticism and out of trying to be as accurate as reasonably possible
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