Paranoid from the state and laws

[Amelius]

Background: I have been clinically diagnosed with OCD and depression; previously, my OCD had more to do with compulsions like checking the lights and similar stuff, but since some three years ago, I've had obsessive, paranoid thoughts concerning the state, and in particular, laws.Recently, a friend of mine died(we're not sure if it's suicide or an accident) and when I was being questioned by authorities, I confessed to have tried weed once with my late friend. The authorities didn't seem to care and reassured me that this wouldn't affect me negatively, but I keep obsessing about it.More generally, I have had similar paranoid thoughts about doing something illegal(watching a copyrighted Youtube video, buying photocopied books for college) and ending up being prosecuted for it.I would say I am a generally moral person and strive to be virtuous, but the insanity of laws keeps me down and in constant stress. This has affected my grades, health, smoking habits,...What is your take on dealing with the ever, perpetual "opinion with a gun"? 

[Wesley]

I think the first thing to figure out with a fear is to what extent is it justified and to what extent is it not justified.

 

To the extent it is justified, then you should thank the fear as something that will protect you from a dangerous situation.

 

To the extent it is not justified, you shoul figure out what you are actually afraid of, mostly as learned behavior from your past. The fear/paranoia was useful when an actual potential danger was present, but now it may be on overdrive. It still is useful in identifying scary situations, but it should be one of the voices you listen to, not something that overtakes you with paranoia.

 

I would maybe look back at some of the mecosystem podcasts. I am sure some people with experience in the area or who are currently listening in that range could help pick out some good ones.

 

I hope this was useful for you. I do not think I am the best one to answer your question, but I see that you weren't getting responses so I wanted to help you out with my understanding and maybe spur some more responses.