Alphas and Betas

[Josh F]

I was considering the moral implications of the designation of Alphas and Betas in our society, and I came to a conclusion that Alpha is a metaphor for sadist, and beta is a metaphor for masochist.  And that ultimately the alpha and beta model is this symbiotic relationship directly in opposition to integrity. 

 

I was thinking about the two groups of people in my life who have most vehemently opposed me.  On one hand, there are these sadistic people, who use charm and humor to mask direct abuse and humiliate me: my dad, a few friends I've had, etc.  On the other hand there are these betas.  Throughout my life meek, shy, nerdy, or square people have tended to also seek to abuse me, often with more passive aggressive tactics.  This is my mom in many respects (though she had her own Sadistic tendencies as well).  This is a couple of old acquaintances I always suspected of rooting for my failure, or talking behind my back, etc.

 

Let me know if this inspires any ideas or anything....

[Lians]

Those are some very good observations, TT. I have some thoughts about the more general issue.

 

I've always found the alpha-omega categorization misleading and unnecessary. We have better and more accurate words to describe it - master and slave. Abstract Greek letters certainly help people avoid the reality of the world around them.

 

The master-slave dynamic is at the root of all violent hierarchies; a horrific outgrowth of anti-philosophical societies. It's accompanied by enforcers (police, military), enablers (priests, intellectuals) and a variety of other auxiliary classes. Typically, this dynamic is only attributed to men, which absolves women of the capacity to do evil.

 

Aggression is the master's tool for control. Passive aggression is the slave's tool for vengeance. I don't know about you, but I've always found passive aggression much more sinister and toxic, particularly in its capacity to become addictive for those who use it. Aggression isn't all that difficult to identify. However, in the absence of self-knowledge, passive aggression can slither behind our defences and slowly eat away at our core.

[zippert]

It is confusing how you use the word alpha. Alpha describes the rank in a social eniviroment of a person. This naturally goes hand in hand with sadism. But there are sadists who are not alphas and alphas who are not sadists, because it is not the exact same thing. It is just a correlation. If you want to describe sadism you can use the word 'sadist'.

[Josh F]

The master-slave dynamic is at the root of all violent hierarchies; a horrific outgrowth of anti-philosophical societies. It's accompanied by enforcers (police, military), enablers (priests, intellectuals) and a variety of other auxiliary classes. Typically, this dynamic is only attributed to men, which absolves women of the capacity to do evil.

 

Aggression is the master's tool for control. Passive aggression is the slave's tool for vengeance. I don't know about you, but I've always found passive aggression much more sinister and toxic, particularly in its capacity to become addictive for those who use it. Aggression isn't all that difficult to identify. However, in the absence of self-knowledge, passive aggression can slither behind our defences and slowly eat away at our core.

I think passive and normal aggression are both tools for control.  The alpha sadist is the obvious aggressor.  The beta masochist is a little more tricky to spot, I've found.  I think the martyr like approach of passive aggressive behavior is designed to seem victimizing.  For example, a woman who is always playing the damsel in distress, but constantly chooses abusive partners. Thats almost a cliche, the girl who bats her eyes and plays victim while some foolish aggressive alpha defends her.  It is natural to describe them as slaves or victims, because if we think of a woman with an abusive man in her life as a victim, but in the aggregate and in reality she is likely seeking out abusive people intentionally. 

It is confusing how you use the word alpha. Alpha describes the rank in a social eniviroment of a person. This naturally goes hand in hand with sadism. But there are sadists who are not alphas and alphas who are not sadists, because it is not the exact same thing. It is just a correlation. If you want to describe sadism you can use the word 'sadist'.

 

My point wasn't to change the word sadist the word alpha, only to point out that the alpha beta paradigm mirrors the sadist masochist paradigm. 

[MysterionMuffles]

WOW! That is a great observation. I always did find it very unsettling to even have to use these categorizations. Betas do tend to invoke sympathy from women to get their need fulfilled, while Alphas are a bit more obvious in their manipulations.

 

This kind of reminded me of How I Met Your Mother. Take the example of Ted in the first season, he's really creepy. Even though you should be rooting for him to find true love, and Barney is an obvious sociopath depending on charm and deceit to score a multiplicity of women, Ted is manipulative in his own subtle way. There's one episode where he goes to the apartment of a girl he dated from years ago that he broke up with...over the phone, only to resume the relationship from where it left off JUST to break up with her in person AGAIN on her birthday LOL. 

 

Sorry, the comedic aspect just kicked in and it is still pretty funny how that one played out. Hell, even worse, he just does a lot of creepy things to meet women that are less obvious than the Alpha Barney. There was even a girl called the Slutty Pumpkin that caught his eye one Halloween party and he never even talked to her, yet he goes to the costume shop to track her contact info down.

 

Anyways enough of those examples, but that's what this topic sparks for me. Alphas are more obvious while Betas have a more subtle approach, but are still just as slimy even though they try to make themselves look like the victim to be nursed into loving.

 

Another thing that comes to mind was a show I used to watch called Keys to the VIP where a 4 man panel judge the pick up skills of two competing men who get secret cameras to track their interactions with women at a club. These 4 men like...who the hell are they to have any authority as to what makes a good pick up? Not sure if it was purely satire now that I think about it, but they really liked critiquing the approaches of these men, and basically it always consisted of Alphas and Betas as you define them.

 

Either they were really douchey to get a woman to feel insecure into wanting to talk to them and give them their numbers, or they were really attracting some sympathy to get the woman's number. Not sure if I ever recall a genuine-ish guy being on the show, nor even the hopeless romantic judge on the panel, but what would I expect from dudes who use bars as their hot spots for scoping women right?

In conclusion I just think these categorizations are inhibiting even minus your definitions of them as sadists or masochists, because they're basically designed to invoke insecurity in the Betas, and false pride in the Alphas.

[Josh F]

I think Betas in that context should be held morally accountable to... like a woman who keeps dating abusive men.

[MysterionMuffles]

Yeah definitely. They love to bitch and moan about how they get rejected or end up with abusive women without ever taking a look at themselves. NOT in that self defeatist way that they usually do, but with clear conscious honesty and a willingness to improve their ways. Thankfully Ted Mosby has...EVER SO SLOWLY!

[kcq]

I often see them NOT used as classifications, but as traits. the same person could exhibit some alpha traits and beta traits. it's just a way to categorize behavior.

[Livemike]

I was considering the moral implications of the designation of Alphas and Betas in our society, and I came to a conclusion that Alpha is a metaphor for sadist, and beta is a metaphor for masochist.  And that ultimately the alpha and beta model is this symbiotic relationship directly in opposition to integrity. 

 

I was thinking about the two groups of people in my life who have most vehemently opposed me.  On one hand, there are these sadistic people, who use charm and humor to mask direct abuse and humiliate me: my dad, a few friends I've had, etc.  On the other hand there are these betas.  Throughout my life meek, shy, nerdy, or square people have tended to also seek to abuse me, often with more passive aggressive tactics.  This is my mom in many respects (though she had her own Sadistic tendencies as well).  This is a couple of old acquaintances I always suspected of rooting for my failure, or talking behind my back, etc.

 

Let me know if this inspires any ideas or anything....

I think it's more a matter of opportunity.  Those who think they can get away with it go open aggressive, those who don't go deniable passive aggressive.

 

But remember you wouldn't call me passive-aggressive if you knew how much it hurt me.

 

(not an original, don't know how said it first)

[Josh F]

haha I've never heard that, very funny.