017 Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Hello! I was wondering if anyone had any recommendaions on books/blogs/any particular methods on delaying gratification? This is one of the biggest issues I've had and would like to resolve but I'm not sure where to start. Any advice/suggestions are welcome. Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pepin Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Is there a particular goal? Like being well of financially? Learning a new skill? Loosing weight? Changing yourself in positive ways? What specifically are you having issue delaying gratification with? Is the challenge technical in that you don't know what to do, or is it a psychological problem? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
017 Posted December 10, 2013 Author Share Posted December 10, 2013 Hi Pepin, thanks for the reply! This is an overall psychological problem for me. Not being able to defer graificaion affects me in all areas of my life, which includes romantic relationships, dietary/lifestyle choices, work life...etc. For example, I'm very passionate about nutrition and spend a ton of time researching about it. I have the knowledge to make positive lifestyle changes that would benefit me very much in the long run. But whenever I feel emotionally stressed or overwhelmed, I can't help but reach for foods that I know are not good for me. I'd eat those foods to feel good for maybe 5 minutes that I'm eating it, and then physically feel ill an hour later. Another example-I recently broke up with my boyfriend but we still see each other for sex. I know logically that this is not good for me, but I just want to fulfill the need of the moment. I noticed that I have very addictive personality and have had issues with alcohol and cigarettes in the past as well. But all of these separate issues seem to stem from my inability to defer instant gratification. I am wondering if this is a learned skill that I just never acquired? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Beal Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I think that commitment is just about the only thing that will work. It's so tempting to come up with justifications for having another drink or another bag of chips. Commitment helps fight against procrastination, lack of motivation and instant gratification. Stef has an awesome bit about this in a recent call in show: http://youtu.be/z3RbCxnOOMc?t=47m20s Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Exceptionalist Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 My advice is, don't call it instant gratification, it is called a long time preference, an economical term. You need a reason for having a short time preference. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meeri Posted December 12, 2013 Share Posted December 12, 2013 I find a good way is to try to understand that overwhelming emotion that precedes reaching for those foods. Therapy is very helpful for that. You may then find the impulses easier to control. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
017 Posted January 28, 2014 Author Share Posted January 28, 2014 Thanks everyone for the reply! It's a little late, but I've been looking more into my past and exploring my childhood, etc. Instead of repeating these unhealthy habits to alleviate anxiety, I've been trying to sit with them and jot down the potential sources of my anxiety and such. I've also stopped punishing myself psychologically whenever I eat "junk" foods from time to time...interestingly, when I stopped punishing myself, I feel less need to act on these habits! I've also started reading "The Psychology of Self-Esteem" by Nathaniel Branden..wonderful book! But again, I appreciate everyone's comments-thanks for taking your time to respond. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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