Had my first really vivid dream in years and I'm interested in the input of you guys

[Honest]

The dream

 

I should start by saying that the first half of this dream is gone. I only remember there was a first part because as soon as I woke up I had it extremely clear in my mind but the second part really stuck with me.

 

Whatever was happening in the first part was going on, and I suddenly "appeared" (in that very jumpy dream fashion) outside the house where I spent almost the entirety of my teenage years. I begin casually walking away from my house along the sidewalk and I notice a chunk of the sidewalk was now a very thin layer of almost solid concrete, in between two larger pools or strips of fresh concrete. I was now walking on the thin layer of solidish concrete and when I was almost out of it, I noticed a number of individuals (3 to 5) sort of murmuring and looking like they had the intention of walking towards me, which they eventually did do. These people were wearing black hooded robes covering them completely except for the face, which they had covered with really eerie white masks, almost like hockey masks but without the little holes. For some reason in my dream I know these individuals are blind, female, and taller than me (I'm 6') I see them and I get anxious so I decide to walk back to my house along the strip of solid concrete, but almost before I finish walking along this fresh/solid/fresh path, I make the decision to step into the wet concrete, somehow to test it. I sink down until it's almost covering my chest but I manage to get back into the more solid bit of concrete, feeling my foot sink a little in the more solid bit but I can still walk. I'm about to finally get out of this patch when I look up (I was staring at my feet after getting out) and to my horror, more of these people walking at me. This time they are much closer, and I don't think to walk back, I brave it without really thinking about it, and as I get off this patch of sidewalk I bump shoulders with one of them, I say sorry and the person says "it's okay." I keep walking towards my house and I wonder if they are going to have any trouble crossing the patch considering they are blind, but I don't think of helping them because in my dream I know they are evil. At this point I wake up a little scared and with my heart pounding.

 

Things to consider

 

What is going on in my life at the moment.

I recently got back in contact with my much older step brother. He is forty something and I'm twenty, he is the product of my Father's (who is now deceased) first marriage. As soon as I moved out on my own he was trying to contact me but I ignored him because I know my mother speaks to him and my mother being the way she is, I find it hard to justify contact with him considering he could be a shill for my mother, never mind the fact that we never had any real connection or friendship. Recently I decided to pick up one of his calls and he told me he had a son, so I decided to email him explaining why I don't speak to him, and sprinkle some "spanking lowers iq, breastfeeding actually increases it, free play in nature and involvement of the father is correlated with empathy" salt and pepper for the kid, and so he doesn't get to say "I didn't know better" if he ends up fucking his kid up.

 

We exchanged emails for some time after he reassured me he shares my feelings about my mother. It culminated in me telling him I could see him this Friday, however I had a change of heart and realized I wasn't feeling comfortable enough to see him, so I told him this through an email right before I went to the couch in which I ended up having an impromptu nap.

 

Other stimuli

I feel asleep on the couch and had my cozy slippers on, which may or may not be a factor in the whole concrete sinking thing.

 

I finished the chapter in The God of Atheists in which Alder is talking a walk and pondering about the conversation he had with the kids in which his son realizes adults proclaim a binary set of ethics and impose that on the children, all the while having a relativist code of ethics (by their own admission) in their daily lives and use mental gymnastics to exclude themselves. (it's a brilliant read by the way, go buy it)

 

After finishing the chapter I put on my iPod and I listened to the "recently added" playlist because first on there was the latest FDR show. That had finished, and the song after it was this. I remember that song playing while I had the second part of the dream.

 

 

What I think

 

In general terms it was about the anxiety of forcing myself to see my brother, the anxiety and awkwardness of having to send that email, and the resolution of finally being able to be true to my thoughts and feelings and not seeing him, but this dream is still intriguing me, I feel like there is something bigger to it, and I'd love your input.

[Greg1]

Maybe the blind women are how you see more other people: statists, abusers, etc.  You got stuck in the recently poured concrete because had shut yourself off too much from the rest of the world and gave up your footing on solid ground.  You let your brother talk to you (climbing out of the mushy concrete of isolation) and bumped into him and he forgave you by saying "it's ok".  Maybe the bumping into him was the realization that he also viewed your mother the same way and he was not just another evil, blind, hooded woman (statist abuser). 

[cynicist]

Interesting dream, I wish you could remember the first part.

 

In the beginning, it sounds like you are leaving home and your family to enter the world. Noticing the differences in the concrete is like noticing the differences in society, and the path you take in life. There is the less commonly traveled path (thin layer) based on reality and philosophical principles (solid, grounded) or the two larger pools of wet concrete on either side of you (relativism, culture, irrational bigotry, going with the flow). The black robed, mask wearing people are clearly conformists (the masks representing the false personas people put on), but also vaguely menacing. You describe them as blind (lacking in self-knowledge) and taller than you (likely meaning they are adults, older). The female aspect is interesting because that could have to do with your mother or females in general, but you didn't mention any other women as relevant so it's more likely the former.

 

To me stepping into the wet concrete and sinking symbolizes testing the path of conformity to the majority of society. You try to sink into the muck (merging with the herd) but change your mind and get out relatively unscathed, except you feel the solid bit of path sink somewhat. I think this is brilliant because it shows how when you move towards irrationality the path to philosophy can start to fade away and no longer remain an option. I think this part has more to do with your relationship to society in a general sense than any specific people, meaning how you present yourself to others.

 

Then you have contact with one of the threatening conformists and apologize. This could be your brother, as he is by your description blind to truth, older, possibly a stooge of your mother, and you likely apologized in email for not meeting him after establishing contact. Finally you wonder if these people will have trouble taking the path of truth since their masks blind them to it (so they will likely sink and blend into the rest of society) but you choose not to help them since you know they are corrupt. 

 

That is my interpretation of it, though one part that doesn't make sense to me is why there are 3-5 individuals. Are there any other members of your mother's circle moving towards you besides your brother? Maybe other family members?

 

I finished the chapter in The God of Atheists in which Alder is talking a walk and pondering about the conversation he had with the kids in which his son realizes adults proclaim a binary set of ethics and impose that on the children, all the while having a relativist code of ethics (by their own admission) in their daily lives and use mental gymnastics to exclude themselves. (it's a brilliant read by the way, go buy it)

 

That makes sense to me. This dream seems like it is all about the corruption of adults and the relativism of society, and the decision that every child eventually has to make on whether to join the herd or become an individual. I still haven't read this book even though everyone says it is fantastic, I will have to start it today.