dirmilj Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Hi there!I have been listening to FDR since 2009 and been into selfknowledge and therapy since 2010. In september 2013, I deFOO'ed. Now I am almost completely lonely, certainly if you count deep and comitted realtionships.I have recently run into a major snag on my journey and I don't really have anyone to talk about it with. I used to see a therapist, but I've since left my home country and am living on very litmited means in my continnued effort to self-actualise.I figure this must be a pretty common situation for FDR members who leave all their bad relationships, but don't immediately find good new ones. Is there any kind of FDR support group for us, I haven't been hanging around the board much so I don't know what the usual procedures look like.Kind Regards,Victor
tjx Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Hi there!I have been listening to FDR since 2009 and been into selfknowledge and therapy since 2010. In september 2013, I deFOO'ed. Now I am almost completely lonely, certainly if you count deep and comitted realtionships.I have recently run into a major snag on my journey and I don't really have anyone to talk about it with. I used to see a therapist, but I've since left my home country and am living on very litmited means in my continnued effort to self-actualise.I figure this must be a pretty common situation for FDR members who leave all their bad relationships, but don't immediately find good new ones. Is there any kind of FDR support group for us, I haven't been hanging around the board much so I don't know what the usual procedures look like.Kind Regards,Victor i don't know how old you are, but you sound relatively young. don't take this the wrong way, but you are too concerned with yourself. socrates famously said "the unexamined life isn't worth living". but i think he was wrong. j. krishnamurti said "self examination always leads to depression". it's been my experience that he was right. i went through something similar (i think) to what you're going through. here's another thing from krishnamurti. someone asked him if he was happy. he told them that he doesn't think about it. he ask if you've ever noticed that when you're happy, that as you notice it, it immediately goes away. what you're going through is very hard. some people don't make it through it. concerned you're self with your work. get your mind off yourself. i once talked with a guy that was hospitalized for clinical depression. when he got out, he said he wasn't helped. he thought of suicide just as often. then one day, he said in order to keep from bringing everyone down at work, he was going to pretend he was happy, just for them. everyday at work he pretended he was happy. when he got off work, he reverted to depression. but he kept doing it everyday, so he didn't depress fellow workers. then one day, it began to change. he noticed that he was starting to actually be happier little by little when he was pretending to be happy. just something to think about. learn not to be so concerned with or about yourself.
dirmilj Posted January 25, 2014 Author Posted January 25, 2014 i don't know how old you are, but you sound relatively young. don't take this the wrong way, but you are too concerned with yourself. socrates famously said "the unexamined life isn't worth living". but i think he was wrong. j. krishnamurti said "self examination always leads to depression". it's been my experience that he was right. i went through something similar (i think) to what you're going through. here's another thing from krishnamurti. someone asked him if he was happy. he told them that he doesn't think about it. he ask if you've ever noticed that when you're happy, that as you notice it, it immediately goes away. what you're going through is very hard. some people don't make it through it. concerned you're self with your work. get your mind off yourself. i once talked with a guy that was hospitalized for clinical depression. when he got out, he said he wasn't helped. he thought of suicide just as often. then one day, he said in order to keep from bringing everyone down at work, he was going to pretend he was happy, just for them. everyday at work he pretended he was happy. when he got off work, he reverted to depression. but he kept doing it everyday, so he didn't depress fellow workers. then one day, it began to change. he noticed that he was starting to actually be happier little by little when he was pretending to be happy. just something to think about. learn not to be so concerned with or about yourself. Well, I would certainly argue that self-knowledge and therpy has helped for me. At my core, I am much happier, driven and confident than before. I've meade a lot of big, positive changes lately, and opened up for so many more possibilties in life. The situation I am currently facing would have devestated me in earlier times.Your approach sounds much more like emotional repression to me, and I did that for 20 odd years - was part of the ailment rather than the cure, for me in any case.If you were honestly trying to help me here, I appricate you for your effort, but if indifferent, wishful and positive thinking is your methodology, I would like no further help from you.
JamesP Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Victor, I sympathize with your experience... it can be pretty lonely in the desert if you don't know where to turn. There are FDR meetup groups out there, so you can check them out to see if people are in your area: http://www.meetup.com/Freedomain-Radio/ You can also reach out to people online, people on the boards or through the Facebook feeds that make good or interesting posts, and connect with them directly. Was this helpful?
dirmilj Posted January 25, 2014 Author Posted January 25, 2014 Victor, I sympathize with your experience... it can be pretty lonely in the desert if you don't know where to turn. There are FDR meetup groups out there, so you can check them out to see if people are in your area: http://www.meetup.com/Freedomain-Radio/ You can also reach out to people online, people on the boards or through the Facebook feeds that make good or interesting posts, and connect with them directly. Was this helpful? Hello James!Thank you for your answer.Unfortunately, I am the only member in my local meetup group, which I have started myself... Am living on a mediterraninan island you see. :)However, the approach of looking through posts for wise members who might be able to help sounds like a good one. I have actually alreday been contacted by another member wishing to have a discussion.Your post was helpful as it proves that there is a community present on these boards, even for lurkers without established credibility such as myself. I very much appreciate it.
Chris Harris Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Hey Victor, let me commend you on the progress you have made so far, congratulations! I participate in a Skype call every Saturday with some really good people (https://plus.google.com/u/0/communities/105784012586757265988) that you are more then welcome to join. Along with that if you would like to ever talk to someone through Skype, I would be more than willing to chat with you sometime (my Skype handle is ChaosOrdered). If neither of those options appeal to you, I wish you the best of luck on your journey and hope you can find some people locally!
dirmilj Posted January 25, 2014 Author Posted January 25, 2014 Hey Victor, let me commend you on the progress you have made so far, congratulations! I participate in a Skype call every Saturday with some really good people (https://plus.google.com/u/0/communities/105784012586757265988) that you are more then welcome to join. Along with that if you would like to ever talk to someone through Skype, I would be more than willing to chat with you sometime (my Skype handle is ChaosOrdered). If neither of those options appeal to you, I wish you the best of luck on your journey and hope you can find some people locally! Hey Chris!Thank you, it's an exciting race to run once you get passed the first hurdle, break free and start running. Then there are all the obstacles along the course that you will have to learn how to deal with when they arrive. Also valuable, but right now I think I've just ran face first into a tree, still need to work on my skills obviously - in order to have as smooth of a race as possible. :)I appreciate the offer and will be in contact if I feel I could use it. Of course feel free to shoot me a PM if you have something on your mind sometime as well.Regards,VIctor
giancoli Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 I'm also looking for other people to socialize with. I have absolutely nobody to talk to. When you are alone for long periods of time, it's almost addictive, I feel uneasy around people and have no patience listening to peoples conversations. I'm afraid I have reached a point of no return, where I'm doomed to live my life in complete isolation both in terms of friendship and romance.
Cornellius Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 i don't know how old you are, but you sound relatively young. don't take this the wrong way, but you are too concerned with yourself. socrates famously said "the unexamined life isn't worth living". but i think he was wrong. j. krishnamurti said "self examination always leads to depression". it's been my experience that he was right. i went through something similar (i think) to what you're going through. here's another thing from krishnamurti. someone asked him if he was happy. he told them that he doesn't think about it. he ask if you've ever noticed that when you're happy, that as you notice it, it immediately goes away. what you're going through is very hard. some people don't make it through it. concerned you're self with your work. get your mind off yourself. i once talked with a guy that was hospitalized for clinical depression. when he got out, he said he wasn't helped. he thought of suicide just as often. then one day, he said in order to keep from bringing everyone down at work, he was going to pretend he was happy, just for them. everyday at work he pretended he was happy. when he got off work, he reverted to depression. but he kept doing it everyday, so he didn't depress fellow workers. then one day, it began to change. he noticed that he was starting to actually be happier little by little when he was pretending to be happy. just something to think about. learn not to be so concerned with or about yourself. You sound like someone whose life is stable and content. But I know it doesn't have jack shit to do with your communistic jovial baloney.
In the belly of the beast Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 I'm also looking for other people to socialize with. I have absolutely nobody to talk to. When you are alone for long periods of time, it's almost addictive, I feel uneasy around people and have no patience listening to peoples conversations. I'm afraid I have reached a point of no return, where I'm doomed to live my life in complete isolation both in terms of friendship and romance. I sympathize and am in a similar situation. I've also felt the same despair, unease, and impatience around most other people for the past several years. Are you in a position to encounter potential quality people, in terms of employment or schooling, location, and pursuit of interests? Keep working on yourself, develop your interests and intellect, and keep looking for the right people. Acknowledge, but don't give in to despair. Nothing is permanent, except for death. I wish that I could offer you more detailed advice based on experience, but I'm still working on this problem as well.
giancoli Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Is there any possibility to search for FDR members based on where they live? I found the meetup thing and created my own meetup, but I doubt anyone will join. I played with the idea of moving to Canada to join a fdr community. On old podcasts Stefan talks about barbecues and I would love to join. Does he still arrange these? Also Canada has the best therapist and I could work on myself and socialize with other likeminded people- I realize it might be a bad idea to move to Canada, with the coming economic collapse. Not sure Norway is any better, we got our oil though.
Cornellius Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 giancoli You're making me realize I need to move to Montreal not only possibility of meeting up with FDR guys, but also PLENTIFUL JOBS! Ah, at least before next winter.
Nala Posted February 11, 2014 Posted February 11, 2014 Where do most of the members live? I want to get out of Virginia. It's a black hole of statists and mystics.
Wesley Posted February 11, 2014 Posted February 11, 2014 Where do most of the members live? I want to get out of Virginia. It's a black hole of statists and mystics. If you click the meetups link at the bottom, you can find which cities have the most/ most active population at least by their meetup attendance. You might be able to narrow it down to at least a top 10 of areas with decent FDR communities where you might which to live. (link in case you couldn't find: http://www.meetup.com/Freedomain-Radio/) You may also wish to look into the Free State Project and I think there are other such areas where libertarians, minarchists, anarchists and agorists tend to live together. I think there is one in Texas too, but I can't find what it is called. There may be others. Finally, with the same link as the others, you can find FDR people in your area and start interacting with them. Even if no one is in your area yet, if you go on and start a group, you may start getting people to respond. Hope this is helpful.
crops Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 Im at this point also. A 'failure to thrive' lost in No mans land with no sense of direction and only a quarter life crisis cattle prod pushing things forward. Ive got myself as company which is more than i had before ha.
Aaron727 Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 If your lonely and wanted to talk with someone my skype is nyax321.
David Twyman Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 <--- Skype name leaneatingmachine Looking for empathic conversation. 20yo from Sydney AUS
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