Omega 3 snake oil Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 Hey all,Stefan said something a while back, can't recall which podcast, that really stuck with me. I'm pretty sure I've heard the idea elsewhere, maybe in a book, etc. but Stefan's rendition is the one I carry.He said, when a sociopath senses empathy in another, he or she will typically use that against the person. Use the fact that they experience compassion as a basis for manipulation. Not surprisingly, the top three professions for sociopaths are (apparently) lawyer, CEO, and politician. These positions have a lot of room for a dishonest person to gain advantage over honest people. I think this much goes without saying.Here's what made me start this thread. The other day I had a meeting with a lawyer (I work in insurance). Without getting into details, this fellow was clearly dishonest, perhaps pathologically so, and seemed a bit grandiose (possible Napoleon complex to boot). A real weasel, in my opinion, and I'm told I'm a good judge of character.Funny thing, the reason I think I'm a good judge of character is I'm a somewhat empathetic person. I read certain traits in others. As such I'm hyperaware of the presence of sociopaths. I spot them more efficiently than they can read/spot me. I don't think they can read empathy in others, rather they pick it up from social cues, social evidence, etc. Anyway, back to the lawyer I was dealing with. I could tell he had no read on me whatsoever and that seemed to make him uncomfortable. He kept his cards close to the vest, so to speak, and in the end our little exchange was a complete waste of time and money (I think his aim was pure posturing), but I really felt I had a much clearer read on him than him, me.So, my question: Is empathy necessarily a hindrance when dealing with sociopaths/people with sociopathic tendencies? Again, not saying this fellow is a sociopath, so you can take my story as a hypothetical if that helps.
Josh F Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 Well, but in the moment you weren't feeling empathetic towards this guy, you were feeling sketched out right? Maybe if you were thinking "oh poor sociopath, he just needs someone to give him love" you'd be paying his bills in no time.Here's the bad news, good luck finding a lawyer who isn't sleezy!
PatrickC Posted February 3, 2014 Posted February 3, 2014 The thing about empathy, is that it's not the same as sympathy. An empathic person is more likely to spot a sociopath than the other way round. Somebody that is easily sympathetic to anyone and everyone is certainly potential prey for a sociopath.
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