Pulling the Fire alarm at the FDR Forum and the Compassion test.

[mshidden]

Pulling the Fire alarm at the FDR Forum and the Compassion test.

 

I have come to realize that I am first and foremost compassionate, not just to those with, but for those without, not just for those that always do good, but for those who sometimes do bad.  I do not need a universal ethic to tell me “first do no harm…” but I am glad somebody else wrote it so I can put it in quotes.

 

No one on FDR was willing to apply UPB to find a compassionate resolution to the Marry Problem. Yes, all the closed minded talk was about the Mary problem, it was all about the lack of compassion for Mary and the lack of compassion for me. Yes some of you had compassion for me, and thank you, but what I really wanted to find was compassion for Mary. I am not even sure there's enough compassion for Mary On FDR to knock her out before they put her in the Wood chipper, how very Fargo of you. I am not sure that really works, but I could not let the visuals of that slip by.

 

Stephan, is not mean, but he does lack a good understanding of compassion, I say this because of his controlling style of conversation. Going so far as telling people they should not laugh about their problems.

 

Sometimes laughing is all you can do, it is a coping mechanisms in this case, but it releases hormones in the brain that can help in problem solving.  The funny thing about a joke is, you have to think about it.  laughing  is a sign of understanding and should be encouraged, not reprimanded.

 

Seriousness is not a useful mindset, and we should not confused seriousness with focused.  A comedian is focused and is in flow, when they are on stage hitting their mark, their clearly not being serious.  So I hope that is proof enough for that idea.

 

Stephan, you can not be held accountable for this behavior because you are not a licensed therapist, but please stop telling people how they should feel, it’s counter productive, and it can do real harm, and I will tell people to stop hitting their kids.

 

Peanut gallery:  “There he is going on about harm again.  I just don’t get it, how can a wishy washy idea like harm have any meaning out of context.”

 

In my mind there are 3 types of solutions in the world. Their are the perfect solutions, there are the good solutions, and then their are the solutions that work.

 

Compassion, ranks high in my values matrix, it ranks way to low on FDR and it’s management, to support FDR, which is too bad.  

 

I will put my time money and energies in the mens right movement and the voice for men.  Thank you for all you taught me in such a short period of time, it was worth every penny. Ok, maybe not, but it was valuable never the less.  

 

Oh I do have one parting Gift.  Spelling? “Really” talk about a lack of Compassion, the truth is I try really hard, I have a learning disability that makes it extremely difficult to write what I have just written.  “To do it, I use a voice synthesizer and I listen to what I wrote, and I catch most errors, but those fucking homophone’s piss me off. “  So let me ask you something would you tell a blind man to quit tapping his cane, because of all the noise? I don’t think so,  so I suggest you get some help with your OCD, about spelling.

Guilt sucks, but when people bring up spelling in a conversation about reason, I feel obligated to shame them and name them. AustinJames

 

an acceptable Mary problem solution.

 

[LovePrevails]

sir I don't mind your bringing your criticisms to the community but you could at least take the time to know enough such as how to spell

Stefan by his actual name

 

it shows a great degree of carelessness that you wouldn't even extend to get clear on something like that before posting here and expecting to be taken seriously

 

people don't care what ya know till they know that ya care

how can you care about the community

[Jagsfan82]

Dude, you can't even spell things consistently and you expect me to listen to you?

[AustinJames]

I know I said I wouldn't respond to any more of these posts, but I feel compelled to express the pride and honor I feel in being specifically acknowledged.  It tells me I'm doing something right.

 

I wouldn't, of course, tell a blind man to stop tapping his cane.  However, if he was counting out five-dollar bills as though they were twenty's, I would politely correct him.  The latter analogy is more appropriate for our situation.  

 

If you don't even spell Stefan's name right on his own forum,  I can't believe that the problem has anything to do with your disability.  As spelling and grammar variations change the meaning of what you say, it is especially important in a conversation about reason to correct what you say.  Criticisms of grammar and spelling are, after all, based on reason.

 

Toodles!  It will probably be good for everyone for you to have some time away from the forum.  I hope you reevaluate your position and join again someday.  Until then, I appreciate you stepping away from the discussion.

[JamesP]

Your protestations of compassion ring somewhat hollow, at least for me.

[RyanT]

 

 I try really hard, I have a learning disability that makes it extremely difficult to write what I have just written.  “To do it, I use a voice synthesizer and I listen to what I wrote, and I catch most errors, but those fucking homophone’s piss me off. “ 

 

 

All the more reason to stop coming on FDR and continually posting these long rambling post,

that you know by now, most on here don't find particularly engaging?

 

You’re criticizing the community here for a supposed lack of compassion,

but could your demeanor be provoking this response in people?

 

That’s what I was alluding to last night when I said you were here to incite your own ostracism,

 

Certainly after reading through your posts, which I found incredibly pompous and condescending,

I felt little compassion towards you and instead felt a strong motivation to respond with ridicule.

 

So instead of 'firing off' I decided to remove myself from the conversation and process it,

realizing that’s exactly the reaction you crave....

 

(...This is why Stefan calls people on giggling while sharing often horrendous childhood trauma, 

and asks them to refrain from it if they want to continue the conversation.

 

Superficially they're saying, 'Please give me compassion and empathy'

while encouraging him to sadistically laugh at their pain and thus minimize it...)

[mshidden]

I know I said I wouldn't respond to any more of these posts, but I feel compelled to express the pride and honor I feel in being specifically acknowledged.  It tells me I'm doing something right.

 

I wouldn't, of course, tell a blind man to stop tapping his cane.  However, if he was counting out five-dollar bills as though they were twenty's, I would politely correct him.  The latter analogy is more appropriate for our situation.  

 

If you don't even spell Stefan's name right on his own forum,  I can't believe that the problem has anything to do with your disability.  As spelling and grammar variations change the meaning of what you say, it is especially important in a conversation about reason to correct what you say.  Criticisms of grammar and spelling are, after all, based on reason.

 

Toodles!  It will probably be good for everyone for you to have some time away from the forum.  I hope you reevaluate your position and join again someday.  Until then, I appreciate you stepping away from the discussion.

You lack of understanding is exemplary to a whole host of biases,  concerning learning and communication.  I will not hold you accountable, but I do feel it is right that I let you know that your assumption are in error.  As for the blind man turnabout is fair play, thanks for reading my post inspite of yourself, and keep an eye on that OCD of yours, because it bound to drive a few people crazy, and it maybe someone you want to like you.

All the more reason to stop coming on FDR and continually posting these long rambling post,

that you know by now, most on here don't find particularly engaging?

 

You’re criticizing the community here for a supposed lack of compassion,

but could your demeanor be provoking this response in people?

 

That’s what I was alluding to last night when I said you were here to incite your own ostracism,

 

Certainly after reading through your posts, which I found incredibly pompous and condescending,

I felt little compassion towards you and instead felt a strong motivation to respond with ridicule.

 

So instead of 'firing off' I decided to remove myself from the conversation and process it,

realizing that’s exactly the reaction you crave....

 

(This is why Stefan calls people on giggling while sharing often horrendous childhood trauma, 

and asks them to refrain from it if they want to continue the conversation.

 

Superficially they're saying, 'Please give me compassion and empathy'

while encouraging him to sadistically laugh at their pain and thus minimize it...)

You have just convinced me, Stefan is dangerous.

[BlackHeron]

I am starting to think that maybe entire threads should be covered by the rating system and could be hidden from view,  like individual posts are within a thread, while browsing from the Topics pages if the originator's reputation falls below the reputation threshold.  

 

Instead, somebody with a very low reputation can forge on gaming the system by continuing to post visible original threads in the forums and sustain the focus on themselves even though their lower-level replies within threads are hidden.

[mshidden]

Your protestations of compassion ring somewhat hollow, at least for me.

Thanks for reading it, we are who we are, the best we can do is be honest and try.

I am starting to think that maybe entire threads should be covered by the rating system and could be hidden from view,  like individual posts are within a thread, while browsing from the Topics pages if the originator's reputation falls below the reputation threshold.  

 

Instead, somebody with a very low reputation can forge on gaming the system by continuing to post visible original threads in the forums and sustain the focus on themselves even though their lower-level replies within threads are hidden.

The reputation system is broken... it's a bad idea how it is implemented and the way it is used is a form of black mail, to silences decent from the norm. What ever that is on this board.  Sorry touchy subject.

[fractional slacker]

I am starting to think that maybe entire threads should be covered by the rating system and could be hidden from view,  like individual posts are within a thread, while browsing from the Topics pages if the originator's reputation falls below the reputation threshold.  

 

Instead, somebody with a very low reputation can forge on gaming the system by continuing to post visible original threads in the forums and sustain the focus on themselves even though their lower-level replies within threads are hidden.

I second this but would go further. Every -10 gets your posting privileges suspended: -10 one month; -20 one year; -30  gets you the Donald Sterling ban for life.

[mshidden]

Awesome Idea, would you like to see the simulation of what would happen, it looks something like this  Rimmer experience.

 

I second this but would go further. Every -10 gets your posting privileges suspended: -10 one month; -20 one year; -30  gets you the Donald Sterling ban for life.

Awesome Idea, would you like to see the simulation of what would happen. It looks something like this  Rimmer experience.

[MysterionMuffles]

You seem to be attracting a ton of downvotes on a daily basis...what do you gain from unloading criticisms about Stefan and community as a whole? Are you not aware that you invite a ton of opposition to threads that really hold no merit?

 

Wow horrible leading questions, but I'm sorry. 

[Stephen C]

I read this post, as you requested, MsHidden. It makes sense to me, of course. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[MysterionMuffles]

sir I don't mind your bringing your criticisms to the community but you could at least take the time to know enough such as how to spell

Stefan by his actual name

 

it shows a great degree of carelessness that you wouldn't even extend to get clear on something like that before posting here and expecting to be taken seriously

 

people don't care what ya know till they know that ya care

how can you care about the community

 

Dude, you can't even spell things consistently and you expect me to listen to you?

 

You guys do realize he admitted to having a learning disability right? And that the only things he spelled wrong in this post is Stefan's name and a their/there/they're mix up. That's only validating his theory for the lack of compassion towards him.

Toodles!  It will probably be good for everyone for you to have some time away from the forum.  I hope you reevaluate your position and join again someday.  Until then, I appreciate you stepping away from the discussion.

 

I agree. A break from the forums would be most productive. You don't have to, Mshidden, because who am I tell to you what to do? I just think time away can help refresh your perspective and cool off from all the scrutiny you've been facing. I haven't delved greatly into your thread but I can tell a lot of people are still riled up and are drawn to downvote you at any turn. If you're used to that kind of rejection and judgement, I would ask myself why? Why is this normal to me? Why do I continue challenging people who I know will mostly be against me?

[mshidden]

I admit it, I brought it upon myself, I am the bad guy for calling you intellectual cowards, I take full responsibility for all the anger, but really you don’t have a problem with putting Marry in a Wood chipper, without knocking her out?

 

No one even bother to call me out on that bit of detail.  The only thing I can believe is that you are not capable of getting your priorities straight.  My Spelling that bothers you, but putting Marry in the Wood chipper, Oh that’s ok.  I can not think of a more diabolical act, but to that I get no reaction. And you wonder why I say you have no Compassion.  

 

The Reason my words sound hollow to you is because you lack Compassion.  That echo, that is where your heart is supposed to be.

 

[Jagsfan82]

You guys do realize he admitted to having a learning disability right? And that the only things he spelled wrong in this post is Stefan's name and a their/there/they're mix up. That's only validating his theory for the lack of compassion towards him.

Ya that was a troll response cause it seemed worth it.  Figured it would hit the spot.

[MysterionMuffles]

for who though?

[AustinJames]

I never said I would put Mary is a wood chipper.  I said I would separate the abused from the abuser.  I'm not "worried" about spelling, I simply can't afford the time to read posts if I have to reread it five times and guess at what is the meaning.

 

You guys do realize he admitted to having a learning disability right? And that the only things he spelled wrong in this post is Stefan's name and a their/there/they're mix up. That's only validating his theory for the lack of compassion towards him.

 

These were the least of his indiscretions.  Read his post history for more egregious errors.  I have very little compassion for those who defend abusers, even in far-fetched imaginary scenarios.

[MysterionMuffles]

Oh yeah...I have...yeesh. Thanks for bringing that to my attention, Austin.

I admit it, I brought it upon myself, I am the bad guy for calling you intellectual cowards, I take full responsibility for all the anger.

 

Is all your post should have said...but you let your ego take over way too quickly.

[JamesP]

His self-righteous protestations of compassion are a clue.