BaylorPRSer Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 I tried explaining why I am an anarchist to my family and they haven't been particularly accepting. We have had some rocky times together, but we are in a pretty good place now in terms of relating respectfully. That being said, certain things still come up and it's clear that my family needs counseling. We are gearing up to get some family counseling and I am planning on explaining why I take NAP so seriously in its universal or near-universal application. Is there any reason why family counseling wouldn't be a good environment to do this? I am resisting the urge to do it now because I think in a more controlled environment with a 3rd party mediator would be preferable. I at this point have not explained that supporting a state means that they want me and those who hold my beliefs thrown in jail, but it is something that has been on my mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMatrixHasMe Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Tough question, but a great one, too. First, I am curious. Have you tried to explain your childhood experiences to your family? I ask, because the nature / quality of your experiences might be more important than trying to jump into a political/apolitial debate with them. I certainly understand the reasoning why one might try that approach to a lion's cage. A ten foot pole can come in handy, but why do you think you might be holding the pole to begin with? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaylorPRSer Posted June 17, 2014 Author Share Posted June 17, 2014 I'm not saying I have to start with that. In fact, I agree that starting from childhood experiences and keeping it as close to the ground up as possible is ideal, but if the ultimate goal is for us to arrive at a place where we as honest as possible about our thoughts and feelings, then my gut tells me it needs to find a way out of head and out in the open. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMatrixHasMe Posted June 18, 2014 Share Posted June 18, 2014 I'm not saying I have to start with that. In fact, I agree that starting from childhood experiences and keeping it as close to the ground up as possible is ideal, but if the ultimate goal is for us to arrive at a place where we as honest as possible about our thoughts and feelings, then my gut tells me it needs to find a way out of head and out in the open. Obviously, it's ultimately up to you to decide on the best course of action or strategy. Having a professionally trained therapist who specializes in the subjects you would like to address with family members, would (hopefully) help you feel safer and calmer by creating an environment with safe emotional boundaries. This could be a positive buffer between you and your family of origin if communications should become challenging. Here are two short videos that might help by Daniel Mackler. Part 1 9 minutes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ua47SXnthxA Part 2 7 minutes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVrPgatTWS8 Please let me know if any of this is helpful, or if I have misunderstood any of your concerns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueechoFeecho Posted June 18, 2014 Share Posted June 18, 2014 The "against me" argument has the potential [and likely, in my opinion] downside of leaving the other party feeling like they are being accused of being evil. Almost nobody enjoys being called evil. It can be a bit of a powder keg. If the other party is someone that really cares about you, then it's one thing, but I suspect it can just as easily reveal something worse as it can turn a relationship into something better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaylorPRSer Posted June 18, 2014 Author Share Posted June 18, 2014 "If the other party is someone that really cares about you, then it's one thing, but I suspect it can just as easily reveal something worse as it can turn a relationship into something better." Didn't understand this sentence. Can you rephrase it maybe? Steve, the videos were helpful. I'll write more about my situation when I have more time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueechoFeecho Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 The "against me" argument is very volatile because it asks the other person to face their true intentions. Do they wish to have force used again you, or don't they? If they do with to have force used against you, then the relationship can only maintain or get worse. If they don't, then it can get better, but that requires someone to step over what will feel like a massive assault on them and accept what they are, and then resolve to become different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaylorPRSer Posted June 19, 2014 Author Share Posted June 19, 2014 Gotcha. I understand now. Good advice guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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