Three Posted August 16, 2014 Posted August 16, 2014 One of the jobs that I currently have is in sales. I'm a vendor who sets up a demo on Monday's and Fridays in Costco and I promote a vitamin like nutrient called CoQ10. The job's base pay better than any of my previous jobs, I get to practice my sales skills, which is an incredibly valuable and transferable skill. Today I was willing to give it all up though. I was willing to cause an incredible amount of dissatisfaction in a customer and risk her complaining to Costco management or contacting my Company's corporate. Because some things are just more important. I had 15 minutes left of my shift. I look to my left and I see a woman just pounding on her son's buttocks. The sound was quite loud, she was using the kind of force you would use to bang on a door out of frustration when you've locked yourself out of your house, hoping someone will wake up to open the door. It was the most violent assault on a child I had seen in years. This was followed by, "I'll give you something to cry about!"Without hesitation i walked over to this woman and told her with firmness, "Ma'm I understand being a parent is difficult, but you do not hit children. That is assault.""How about you not tell me how to parent?" She barked"That's not parenting, that's abuse", I retorted. She then went on to ask me if I had kids, I told her no, and then I looked at the boy in the cart and ignored her. I asked if he was okay. With hindsight, I realize this was a silly question to ask given that he was just beat, but I wanted to sympathize with him and let him know that I cared about him. She repeated herself, "OH SERIOUSLY? Do you have kids""No,but I would never hit a child any more than I would hit a woman.""We'll, good for you. Thanks for telling me how to parent!", She walked away. I might wear slacks, a polo, and a name badge, but I'm more than a salesmen, I'm a philosopher and it's my duty to help people. And I wanted to use this post to encourage you all to do the same. 25
Kevin Beal Posted August 16, 2014 Posted August 16, 2014 That is fucking awesome man! Letting this poor boy know that it's not okay and there are people in the world who will stand up against that is really important. I was just imagining myself in this situation and stewing on it for a while and I thought of a reply that I wish I would be quick enough to say in the moment about how this woman says that you're not a parent so,... shut up, I guess. "If you had a husband and he was here pounding on you, should I just say to myself 'hey, I've never been married, so maybe there is a good reason he's beating on you' and be 'humble' about the fact that I've never been married?" And what a petty and cowardly bitch she is. Thank you for saying something. Massive kudos to you, sir. 2
MysterionMuffles Posted August 16, 2014 Posted August 16, 2014 Fuck YES, Joel!!! You're seriously a brave mofo.
MysterionMuffles Posted August 16, 2014 Posted August 16, 2014 Damn I mean, intervening when a kid's just being yelled at that's one thing, but a public spanking, who ELSE would've stepped in?
Three Posted August 16, 2014 Author Posted August 16, 2014 That is fucking awesome man! Letting this poor boy know that it's not okay and there are people in the world who will stand up against that is really important. I was just imagining myself in this situation and stewing on it for a while and I thought of a reply that I wish I would be quick enough to say in the moment about how this woman says that you're not a parent so,... shut up, I guess. "If you had a husband and he was here pounding on you, should I just say to myself 'hey, I've never been married, so maybe there is a good reason he's beating on you' and be 'humble' about the fact that I've never been married?" And what a petty and cowardly bitch she is. Thank you for saying something. Massive kudos to you, sir. Thank you Kevin. You're kind words mean alot to me and that's a really good point. that analogy really drives home just how crazy her statement was. Marlon, thank you for your kind words too. I appreciate the feedback. It really means a lot to me.
J. D. Stembal Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 You, sir, are a paragon of bravery and virtue. Keep up the great work! I will strive to have the courage to speak up if I see this kind of behavior in public. Thank you for setting a good example for the parent and the child.
DCLugi Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 Nothing short of heroic. I like to think that the woman told the story to a friend who said, "Well, he is right. You wouldn't want to be hit like that."
marina Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 That's a brave and awesome thing you did Joel.. 9 out of 10 people would have ignored it but you didn't.. you're a real human being! Awake & unafraid to stand up for the innocent! Thank you!
Jeremy Dahl Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 You just helped a child from trauma, a parent with social accountability, and lived true to your convictions.Major props.
J-William Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 I know you're not here for the adulation and praise.... no you're here to show the board your winning smile :-P ... Err, where was I... oh yes, I don't think I've ever seen a post with 15 positive points. I'll just throw this out there, I don't think I would have done that here in China I don't speak Chinese very well... I'm less certain whether I would have done what you did if I were in the US. But needless to say, you've got some big brass balls brother!
Three Posted August 19, 2014 Author Posted August 19, 2014 You, sir, are a paragon of bravery and virtue. Keep up the great work! I will strive to have the courage to speak up if I see this kind of behavior in public. Thank you for setting a good example for the parent and the child. No problem! Thank you for your kind words. Expect more posts like this in the future and if you wanna read more posts from me that might be valuable in their own little way, check out my profile and I gotta whole list on there! Nothing short of heroic. I like to think that the woman told the story to a friend who said, "Well, he is right. You wouldn't want to be hit like that." haha I like to think that too, luigi! That's a brave and awesome thing you did Joel.. 9 out of 10 people would have ignored it but you didn't.. you're a real human being! Awake & unafraid to stand up for the innocent! Thank you! Hey, Marina! Thank you for your support and your kind words. You just helped a child from trauma, a parent with social accountability, and lived true to your convictions.Major props. I appreciate that! I know you're not here for the adulation and praise.... no you're here to show the board your winning smile :-P ... Err, where was I... oh yes, I don't think I've ever seen a post with 15 positive points. I'll just throw this out there, I don't think I would have done that here in China I don't speak Chinese very well... I'm less certain whether I would have done what you did if I were in the US. But needless to say, you've got some big brass balls brother! haha thank you. I do like praise if it's from good people and if its for a good reason! it's motivating. we all need a pat on the back for our accomplishments from time to time.
Mr. Wrong Posted August 19, 2014 Posted August 19, 2014 Well done. I find those situations more difficult after the fact because my emotions are in conflict. I can't decide whether to walk tall or feel horrible for the child. I can't do both. I would defend kids even when I was working as a Christian sports coach. Do you feel the same way? It's hard to balance personal pride with sympathy.
fractional slacker Posted August 19, 2014 Posted August 19, 2014 I am really sorry you had to witness this out of control woman beating a child. That is an image that had to be horrifying to see.Your corresponding actions took a lot of bravery and courage by risking both your economic and physical well being. You are like a real life superhero. I have a few questions. 1. Is this the first time you have intervened? 2. Had you ever practiced what you would do in such a situation? 3. Is there anything you might do differently should you come across a similar situation in the future?
luxfelix Posted August 19, 2014 Posted August 19, 2014 In that single act you have shined a light into the cave of that child's life. He will not forget that there is another way; I hope he'll follow the light.
Yeravos Posted August 19, 2014 Posted August 19, 2014 You are a true hero Joel. Not like those made-up comic book ones that fight evil with their fists and guns, but with instead with your REAL, VIRTUES! You go man!
Three Posted August 20, 2014 Author Posted August 20, 2014 Well done. I find those situations more difficult after the fact because my emotions are in conflict. I can't decide whether to walk tall or feel horrible for the child. I can't do both. I would defend kids even when I was working as a Christian sports coach. Do you feel the same way? It's hard to balance personal pride with sympathy. That's interesting. And good for you that you defended children before! Well, I think all emotions are welcome. First, before , during and directly after, my fight of flight has kicked in and so I'm completely wired, anger, scared. Then afterwards, I feel good about myself while still feeling adrenaline pumping, then when the fight or flight wears off, the full horror of what I just saw inks in and I weep. This is usually what occurs for me emotionally. I am really sorry you had to witness this out of control woman beating a child. That is an image that had to be horrifying to see.Your corresponding actions took a lot of bravery and courage by risking both your economic and physical well being. You are like a real life superhero. I have a few questions. 1. Is this the first time you have intervened? 2. Had you ever practiced what you would do in such a situation? 3. Is there anything you might do differently should you come across a similar situation in the future? Thank you for your kind words! And I appreciate the sympathy. It was horrifying. to answer your question,No, this is not the first. This is the eighth time. Second time on a job. I consider doing it practice since in the heat of the moment, its hard to do everything just right. sometimes I forget to focus on the child and only say something to the adult. and I do prepare. the "thats not parenting thats abuse", phrase I had in mind. I had an idea of how she'd respond because they tend to repeat themselves with some variation of "dont tell me how to raise my kid" or "I discipline my kids" What I would've done differently? Great question. After she said, "thanks for telling me how to parent my kid." I wish I would have said "you're welcome" or "but, you werent parenting you were assaulting a child". I wish I would have said what kevin pointed out in his post. And i wish I would have said something better to the kid like, "oh my gosh I saw that, I'm so sorry, you didnt deserve that. never accept that. she had no right to do that."in these moments, there's no place for perfectionism. but, there's always room for improvement. I tell myself, "even if you choke up and can barely say a word or studder, that's better than nothing. "but its also good to keep in mind that you dont want to completely bomb or you give the child the lesson "good people will lose" In that single act you have shined a light into the cave of that child's life. He will not forget that there is another way; I hope he'll follow the light. me too! and thank you, brother You are a true hero Joel. Not like those made-up comic book ones that fight evil with their fists and guns, but with instead with your REAL, VIRTUES! You go man! I'm going to buy a super man shirt now. I feel like I've earned it!haha but, hey I really appreciate your word. The support mean a lot. Also. if you guys want to read more by me or other interventions I've been in, I have posts listed on my profile. Feel free to give it a look!
Mr.Anarchist Posted August 20, 2014 Posted August 20, 2014 I have often thought about what I would do if I encountered such a situation. It's a challenging and possibly dangerous action to confront an assault in progress. Thank you for your bravery and effort in helping that defenseless little boy.
A__ Posted August 20, 2014 Posted August 20, 2014 This is awesome. Excellent. Inspiring. The other comments here are great to read too. A million thumbs up!
Kevin Beal Posted August 20, 2014 Posted August 20, 2014 The first post in this thread is the 3rd highest rated piece of content in board history.
Magnus Posted August 29, 2014 Posted August 29, 2014 I'm representing a young man who's been arrested and accused of disorderly conduct. He's somewhat argumentative, rough, semi-literate, and has a history of fights and other misdemeanors. I found out today that the "crime" in question consists of him interposing his body between a father and that man's 2 year-old son, who was strapped in a car seat in a parked car. My client was exiting a grocery store, saw the man yelling and hitting the child. He intervened, and told the abuser that he'd have to go through him to hit the boy again. In the fascist county where this occurred, that's considered to be a crime. He was arrested, cuffed, hog-tied, put in a squad car and THEN pepper-sprayed.
Three Posted September 4, 2014 Author Posted September 4, 2014 I'm representing a young man who's been arrested and accused of disorderly conduct. He's somewhat argumentative, rough, semi-literate, and has a history of fights and other misdemeanors.I found out today that the "crime" in question consists of him interposing his body between a father and that man's 2 year-old son, who was strapped in a car seat in a parked car. My client was exiting a grocery store, saw the man yelling and hitting the child. He intervened, and told the abuser that he'd have to go through him to hit the boy again.In the fascist county where this occurred, that's considered to be a crime. He was arrested, cuffed, hog-tied, put in a squad car and THEN pepper-sprayed. my goodness, that's an incredible story. I'm amazed. I hope things turn out well for the man you're representing. let me know how it goes.
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