Infantilization and The Erosion of Self Efficacy (Video Version)

[Three]

It's not perfect, but I wanted to try something new!

[Robinson]

Thanks for sharing this, I can definitely relate to the removal of responsibility in undermining my own self-efficacy.  

 

The example of this that comes to my mind was my college process, where the questions my parents posed to me were not, "Do you want to go to college?  Do you think college makes sense, based on your dreams and goals?"  The question was, "Which college do you want to go to?"  I ended up going without direction and with an underdeveloped self-concept.  This made me susceptible to peer-pressure, conformity and participating in activities that were dangerous to my health.  I was also disinterested in actual learning.  I finally broke out of it, but I would definitely say I was lucky to survive unscathed.

 

A key resource in developing my own self-efficacy has been Nathaniel Branden's Six Pillars of Self-Esteem.  It contains some really helpful sentence-stem exercises. 

 

Are you familiar with the book?

 

Thanks again and sorry you had to bear such treatment. I am glad to see you're evolving past it though

[Bouncelot]

Very good. Thanks for Sharing!

 

I have not been through this myself, but have witnessed it over the years with friends and relatives. When i confronted those involved about it they were dumbfounded, and just did not get the damage that was being done. IMO it's the equivalent of a a bird picking the wing feathers off their young.

[Three]

Thanks for sharing this, I can definitely relate to the removal of responsibility in undermining my own self-efficacy.  

 

The example of this that comes to my mind was my college process, where the questions my parents posed to me were not, "Do you want to go to college?  Do you think college makes sense, based on your dreams and goals?"  The question was, "Which college do you want to go to?"  I ended up going without direction and with an underdeveloped self-concept.  This made me susceptible to peer-pressure, conformity and participating in activities that were dangerous to my health.  I was also disinterested in actual learning.  I finally broke out of it, but I would definitely say I was lucky to survive unscathed.

 

A key resource in developing my own self-efficacy has been Nathaniel Branden's Six Pillars of Self-Esteem.  It contains some really helpful sentence-stem exercises. 

 

Are you familiar with the book?

 

Thanks again and sorry you had to bear such treatment. I am glad to see you're evolving past it though

Thank you so much for your feedback and for watching my first video. I grow a little more everyday. I have heard of that book. I'm actually finishing up "How to Raise your Self Esteem" by that same author. Those are great points. Responsibility is empowering. Removing responsibilities leaves us feeling helpless and denies us opportunities for growth. We find out about ourselves through learning and trying new things and as you said, without those opportunities are self concept is weakened. It's a very subtle way to control. How do I know it wasn't about me? Because when I'd ask for my power back, I would be attacked. "You don't need a GPS", my mom would scream.  

 

Very good. Thanks for Sharing!

 

I have not been through this myself, but have witnessed it over the years with friends and relatives. When i confronted those involved about it they were dumbfounded, and just did not get the damage that was being done. IMO it's the equivalent of a a bird picking the wing feathers off their young.

Thank you for your feedback! 

Some abusers beat you down with their fists. Infantilization beats you down in the ways we just mentioned. However, because it can be hidden under the guise of "loving behavior", it can be coupled with deniability much easier. "I'm just trying to help!" "what you mean you don't want me to put you through college?" This kind of subtlety keeps the victim unaware of the abuse.