bootoo Posted September 22, 2014 Posted September 22, 2014 First im hearing about 'Sarah Blaffer Hrdy' - but one of many talking about our ancient roots being peaceful and co-operative and mainly polygynous (multiple sexual partners) with the ability to just walk off and join another tribe if someone became too oppressive - and how that effects parenting - Thanks! ''As you argue in your latest book, Mothers and Others, humans evolved as cooperative breeders. However, most psychology studies (and nearly all parenting advice books) assume that the nuclear family is integral to human nature. How does this assumption influence the kind of advice parents receive?'' http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/primate-diaries/2012/03/16/raising-darwins-consciousness-an-interview-with-sarah-blaffer-hrdy-on-mother-nature/
bootoo Posted November 12, 2014 Author Posted November 12, 2014 Good short article by Chris Ryan who wrote 'Sex at Dawn' including touching on the 'alloparent' model we are wired to live in http://debateout.com/christopher-ryan-author-human-sexuality-expert/ “If a child is getting love and support from several different adults, which is how our ancestors evolved, then they will develop a different psychological mindset where they aren’t expecting all of their love and emotional nourishment to only come from one or two people. In the nuclear family, there’s a baby who thinks there are two people or one person who they are dependent on for everything. If that person stops loving them, then they will die. “There’s a different personality structure that forms there, and that is the genesis of the pair-bonding need that a lot of people have. And of the insane jealousy and insecurity that people have around losing that primary partner. These are things that grow out of an emotional environment of scarcity, where you think: ‘If I lose him or her, then I’m going to be miserable and alone.’ “It’s weird that people think it makes sense to apply a completely different vision of relationships when it comes to sexuality than when it comes to any other relationships in our lives. You don’t get pissed off if your friend has other friends. And yet, we apply this distorted and warped reasoning to our other relationships.” Puritans and impotent old men ruined everything for everyone 1
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