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Cantwell confession


fractional slacker

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I know some think this guy a jerk. I am not here as a cheerleader. He wrote a rather revealing and vulnerable article about his personal issues and romantic relationship troubles.  It takes a lot of courage to admit you really don't know what you are doing.  I thought some might be able to relate to where he is coming from.

http://www.christophercantwell.com/2014/10/11/sorry-silent/

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I'm older than Cantwell. And I can't say I have ever been in love. I think that has saved me lots of trouble. But I'm not entirely sure that I am better off not. I have long had the belief that being in love is something weak dysfunctional people do. It's like taking up cocaine I hear, something else I haven't done. Fun euphoria at the beginning followed by a miserable crash.

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I'm older than Cantwell. And I can't say I have ever been in love. I think that has saved me lots of trouble. But I'm not entirely sure that I am better off not. I have long had the belief that being in love is something weak dysfunctional people do. It's like taking up cocaine I hear, something else I haven't done. Fun euphoria at the beginning followed by a miserable crash.

Are you certain that what you and Cantwell are describing is not lust or short-term infatuation, rather than love (at least as generally defined in the FDR community)?

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Yes, I'm going to be circumspect here realising that people have their own history to discover for themselves of course. But the kind of love Cantwell talks about in that post he wrote, reminds me of the kind of love (or lack thereof) that he probably got from his mother. He chose the bitch that ripped his heart out, because she was a mirror of his mother I imagine.

 

These kinds of stories remind me of the turbulence that Hamlet went through with Ophelia and his mother Gertrude. Which completely replicates some of the sentiment of kalima's post. Claiming that love is for the weak and dysfunctional. Hamlet felt like a wretch who was ultimately having his strings pulled by his mother.

 

These kinds of relationships are toxic to a mans heart. If not cured with self knowledge. They will forever be doomed to seek out this toxicity or eventually give up and replicate the same toxicity on a much weaker woman.

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