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I have too many problems...?


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Thanks for all the responses and feedback. I am just editting this post, close to a year later... I was just looking back at my old posts and I came across this. I just thought I would mention I am now almost 18, have been in therapy for a couple years, have gained my independence and life is great..! 

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I'm very sad to hear what has happened to you and I don't know what I could say that might help. We're all looking for someone to connect with and it seems to me that most people I see are playing some role with each other so they could at least live in the fantasy. However, if you connect with yourself you'll never feel lonely. You can be your own best company, this way every new relationship will be a plus and you'll never have anything missing if they happen to end.

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I feel sad and anxious after reading your post. I am sorry your parents and those around you can't or won't give you support and a connection. Being 17 can be frustrating when you are thrown to the wolves and no one seems to notice or care. And then you are forced to see other teens having the time of their life and you feel cheated, resentment, and anger. It's way messed up, I know.

You seem like a smart guy who has courage to at least reach out. Keep being compassionate with yourself. Don't blame yourself for your circumstances, but realize only you can change those circumstances.  Have you tried reading some of the books suggested in the self knowledge section? I know it's not a substitute for connecting with someone, but having self knowledge increases the chance of making and sustaining a connection. Like Wuzzums said, if you can't for now connect with those around you, connect with yourself. 

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I am going to be honest.. I feel  helluva lot better this morning. I had food poisoning on saturday and was still recovering yesterday (and today a bit) and it got me pretty down that when I told people in my family, not a single person seemed to care at all, ask me how I feel, etc. 

 

In any case, I really appreciate both your responses and you are totally right. I must connect with myself. At this point what I have been doing is just working out, taking runs, doing yoga, etc... Whatever makes me healthier and feel good so atleast I will be in a better position in the future.. and feel better is the present. In regards to reading some of the books, I actually have 2 of Nathaniel Brandan's books I got through quite a bit and never picked it back up... Maybe it is time.

 

And fractional slacker... You pretty much nailed what I have felt... "thrown to the wolves and no one seems to notice or care."

 

Thanks a lot. And I warmly assure you I feel 10x better this morning. Unfortunately I got high school and must be ready for a bunch of femenists to claim patriarchy, etc... But I am waiting for a project or any oppurtunity to explain how incredibly sexist (towards men & women) that is, and that it is disrespectful to claim such things without any evidence, especially not recognizing we all have our different experiences. I get extremely anxious when I hear a teacher claim we live in a patriarchal society. I have yet to respond. I have though, spoken up to girls my age who claim "all boys are immature, emotionless pigs" and told them thats incredibly sexist... Until another guy said "Well its true"... 

 

Anyways, just thought I would share. 

 

All the best everyone.

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JakeN, I'm very sorry to hear about your greatly unfortunate personal circumstances.  I don't know if I would be able to keep afloat if I were handed your life situation.  However, there is a way out.  It is difficult to to conceive of, but it is there.  It is a matter of managing your emotions so they don't get the best of you (which is going to be a real challenge).  Focus on the tasks you have set for yourself for the immediate future.  For example, say to yourself "what am I going to do today or tonight to work towards where I want to be."  Put "horse blinders" on and make those tasks your whole world.  Don't think ahead that far into the future.  The supermarket seems to be a great place for you.   Think about the supermarket.  Focus on it.  Someday you will be there with a future spouse or child and you will talk about the comfort that that place gave you.  Time is on your side. 

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