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Bad Parents - The Disease of Human Rot


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ugh dude...I watched a few seconds of some without sound. It's too horrifying. I'd rather not seek out more videos like these. This shit just pisses me off. I'd rather focus on solutions.

There is only one solution. Non-violence.

 

This shit won't change without getting angry first. That anger needs to be directed at the right target, though.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUdRgNPUw0s

 

 

but I understand what you mean.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqbqnHyC0t0

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  • 2 weeks later...

I've contributed to your 4th downvote Nathan...I'm not sure what your real motivation was in posting all these horrendous videos. You do need to realize that the overload of such abuse as an initial thread might be unempathetic. Based on how you responded to me, it just seems like you want to infuriate people with these clips. We know this is bad, but why beat a dead ass horse to this degree? I'm sorry if I'm coming off as aggressive, but it's kinda what happens when you experience or see such traumatic events.

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Based on how you responded to me, it just seems like you want to infuriate people with these clips. We know this is bad, but why beat a dead ass horse to this degree? I'm sorry if I'm coming off as aggressive, but it's kinda what happens when you experience or see such traumatic events.

 

I agree with you, but there's a different possibility.

 

http://www.dangerandplay.com/2014/10/30/stop-thinking-negative-thoughts/

 

For whatever reason, Nathan Diehl decided to type "worst examples of child abuse" into a YouTube search bar.  No one can read Nathan's mind.  Maybe his intentions were good, maybe not. 

 

But the predictable outcome of his decision was that he couldn't handle it.  He got really, really angry and felt really, really helpless.  So he had no choice but to post all of those videos on this board, without so much as a question-asked. 

 

If Nathan can somehow understand that it wasn't in his best interest to go deliberately searching for child abuse videos, then he can acquire some self-knowledge.  But if he's unwilling to analyze why he did that, nor to even explain why he did that, then he (weeks after posting this thread) is not interested in using the FDR message board to pursue self-knowledge about this event - even though his post caused a lot of anxiety. 

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This thread has been dead for two weeks, why come back to it?

 

It's still at the top of the Peaceful Parenting forum and I just noticed that hannah posted a reply.

 

Are you not willing to answer any of my questions?

 

I just realized that I put them forth as statements, but what were your motivations for posting this thread? What triggered this frustration for you? We are all sickened by abusive parents for sure, and someone did post a video of a man beating a bunch of kids in his daycare (I think it was in Egypt). But you posted more than just one video, you posted SEVERAL, which to me at least, felt like an overload of moral outrage.

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It's still at the top of the Peaceful Parenting forum and I just noticed that hannah posted a reply.

 

Are you not willing to answer any of my questions?

 

I just realized that I put them forth as statements, but what were your motivations for posting this thread? What triggered this frustration for you? We are all sickened by abusive parents for sure, and someone did post a video of a man beating a bunch of kids in his daycare (I think it was in Egypt). But you posted more than just one video, you posted SEVERAL, which to me at least, felt like an overload of moral outrage.

 

To trigger an emotional response. 

 

what do you mean "overload of moral outrage"?

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To trigger an emotional response. 

 

what do you mean "overload of moral outrage"?

 

Yeah I get that, but why? What were you supposed to gain in terms of discussion or satisfaction if we gave that?

 

And by overload of moral outrage, I mean like...listening to a call-in show, I'm always open to listen to people open up about their lives. Whether it's personal stuff or ambitious stuff. The personal calls are very vulnerable and heart felt, and sometimes even heart breaking, especially people who open up about horrendous childhood experiences. There's a line between listening to those specific calls for wanting to learn something, whilst also having an emotional response that may result in moral outrage for how poorly children are treated. And then the other side of that line is listening PURELY for the moral outrage like you just wanna get mad for the sake of simply getting mad.

 

So with this thread, yes you would've caused some moral outrage with posting one specific video depicting child abuse. But you posted more than one and I got the impression was for everyone else to collect as many abuse videos as possible to share, and to me that just seemed counter productive to actually spreading peaceful parenting when all we were gonna do was try to jampack a thread with such horrendous videos.

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Yeah I get that, but why? What were you supposed to gain in terms of discussion or satisfaction if we gave that?

 

And by overload of moral outrage, I mean like...listening to a call-in show, I'm always open to listen to people open up about their lives. Whether it's personal stuff or ambitious stuff. The personal calls are very vulnerable and heart felt, and sometimes even heart breaking, especially people who open up about horrendous childhood experiences. There's a line between listening to those specific calls for wanting to learn something, whilst also having an emotional response that may result in moral outrage for how poorly children are treated. And then the other side of that line is listening PURELY for the moral outrage like you just wanna get mad for the sake of simply getting mad.

 

So with this thread, yes you would've caused some moral outrage with posting one specific video depicting child abuse. But you posted more than one and I got the impression was for everyone else to collect as many abuse videos as possible to share, and to me that just seemed counter productive to actually spreading peaceful parenting when all we were gonna do was try to jampack a thread with such horrendous videos.

 

I wasn't going to gain anything. I've already gained what I needed long before I posted. 

 

If I wanted to make people just feel angry, I would have posted videos of children being torn apart in war. Didn't do that, wouldn't do that. There is nothing we can do to stop those kinds of atrocities. 

 

Why are you so interested in this thread?

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Ok thank you for sharing that. My interest was to see if anyone else was as offended as I was. And also trying to guage if you had ulterior motives with it, but if that's not the case, I apologize for my error in judgement.

Why do you think that was your initial reaction which was also strong enough to bring you back after two weeks?

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Ok thank you for sharing that. My interest was to see if anyone else was as offended as I was. And also trying to guage if you had ulterior motives with it, but if that's not the case, I apologize for my error in judgement.

 

I was very much offended, probably more so than you.  But I didn't push back on Nathan Diehl because he and I got into a big spat on the transgender thread.  And I wasn't sure whether that was clouding my judgment. 

 

Now that you've pushed backed on Nathan, I realize that: (1) I'm more offended now than I was then.  (2) You don't have the amygdala-attacking tools to "get to the bottom" of Nathan's motivations, actions, and so on.  And (3) This board promotes a very non-confrontational / peaceful perspective, so I'm reluctant to use those amygdala-attacking tools on him. 

 

So I just leave Nathan alone, and also know that you're very uncomfortable with those tools. 

 

I feel no ill-will towards you, Nathan, nor this board's non-confrontational perspective - mostly because I could be dead-wrong about Nathan's intentions / actions in this thread and because it's really not worth causing a spat over. 

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My anger was very much focused on the people in the videos and not at Nathan. It's not as if he was pulling a "LifeGoesOnBrah" and saying something like, "These parents ace doing the best they could with the knowledge they had." I don't think he was trying to intentionally inflame anyone, but regardless, since we all had overwhelmingly negative responses to the video, we should probably try to hash it out.

 

In his second post, Nathan said:

 

"This shit won't change without getting angry first. That anger needs to be directed at the right target, though."

 

We should probably decide where is the best place to direct our anger.

 

I've got a couple questions.

 

1) Why are there so many people content to whip out their phone and record the abuse, but very few who actually attempt to interfere?

 

2) If parents know that everyone can record anyone at any point in time, why do they raise their children in this abusive manner? They have to know it's going to come to light at some point. Kids are smart. If I wanted to get an abusive parent in trouble, I would instigate their rage in public where they are likely to be stopped, confronted, or recorded.

 

All the video are awful, but it was the video of the mom swatting her infant child in the car seat that really freaked me out. I can't watch it a second time.

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My anger was very much focused on the people in the videos and not at Nathan. It's not as if he was pulling a "LifeGoesOnBrah" and saying something like, "These parents ace doing the best they could with the knowledge they had." I don't think he was trying to intentionally inflame anyone, but regardless, since we all had overwhelmingly negative responses to the video, we should probably try to hash it out.

 

I agree with you.  I don't think Nathan is being malicious, just unwise (with regard to his own well-being) and insensitive (with regard to everyone else's well-being). 

 

There's simply no reason to acquire a gigantic list of child abuse videos to post on here.  No lesson is being learned.  No personal issue is being discussed. 

 

It's just, "I'm mad.  Be mad along with me." 

 

I'm angry because Nathan would've been better served NOT looking for those child abuse videos in the first place.  And if he hadn't looked for them, we wouldn't have seen them. 

 

So the ultimate question is, "WHY, Nathan?"  (And your answer, "To trigger an emotional response." doesn't work for me.  I hope it was something deeper like, "Well, I was feeling angry because of something else in my personal life.  And I didn't know what else to do....so I posted those videos so that others could be angry alongside of me."  Because if you didn't have a deeper motivation, then you exposed the entire forum to child abuse videos for no "real" reason.)

 

Again, I don't think you were ever malicious - just short-sighted and inconsiderate. 

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My anger was very much focused on the people in the videos and not at Nathan. It's not as if he was pulling a "LifeGoesOnBrah" and saying something like, "These parents ace doing the best they could with the knowledge they had." I don't think he was trying to intentionally inflame anyone, but regardless, since we all had overwhelmingly negative responses to the video, we should probably try to hash it out.

 

In his second post, Nathan said:

 

"This shit won't change without getting angry first. That anger needs to be directed at the right target, though."

 

We should probably decide where is the best place to direct our anger.

 

I've got a couple questions.

 

1) Why are there so many people content to whip out their phone and record the abuse, but very few who actually attempt to interfere?

 

2) If parents know that everyone can record anyone at any point in time, why do they raise their children in this abusive manner? They have to know it's going to come to light at some point. Kids are smart. If I wanted to get an abusive parent in trouble, I would instigate their rage in public where they are likely to be stopped, confronted, or recorded.

 

All the video are awful, but it was the video of the mom swatting her infant child in the car seat that really freaked me out. I can't watch it a second time.

 

I'll give it a shot.

 

1) social repercussions

2) It's still safe for parents to abuse their children in public for the most part. Rarely are abusive parents confronted. 

 

 

I've got a couple of questions.

 

1) when an individual is unwilling to face their own abusive parents, where does that anger go?

2) internet forum psychologizing is good for ...what?

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I'll give it a shot.

 

1) social repercussions

2) It's still safe for parents to abuse their children in public for the most part. Rarely are abusive parents confronted. 

 

 

I've got a couple of questions.

 

1) when an individual is unwilling to face their own abusive parents, where does that anger go?

2) internet forum psychologizing is good for ...what?

 

Are you assuming that, "All we've got to do in order to confront child abusers is just look at these videos over and over again until we get really angry."?

 

Given that you posted those videos in order to make us angry, it certainly seems that you're assuming that.  But the process is much more complicated. 

 

I think less than 10% of FDR listeners will ever learn to confront child abusers, because it's a skill that none of us begin with that also requires years to develop.  That's why I admire Joel Patterson so much, and have told him so multiple times.

 

Have you ever publically confronted a child abuser, Nathan?

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I watched all of those videos you linked, in succession. I can't say I got much out of it. just feeling despision and horror. Also kind of helpless.

 

I don't think freedomainradio forums are in need of enlightenment about the cruelty of (certain) mothers I might be wrong, but i really doubt it.

 

So yeah, im not sure if this was helpful. Feel more paralysed than empowered. That's me though.

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I watched all of those videos you linked, in succession. I can't say I got much out of it. just feeling despision and horror. Also kind of helpless.

 

I don't think freedomainradio forums are in need of enlightenment about the cruelty of (certain) mothers I might be wrong, but i really doubt it.

 

So yeah, im not sure if this was helpful. Feel more paralysed than empowered. That's me though.

 

I'd think you'd be surprised. 

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I'd think you'd be surprised. 

 

Nathan......

 

Not only is David Twyman unlikely to be surprised, but neither is everyone in this thread - (all of whom agree with him, have upvoted him, and have downvoted you).

 

So, Nathan, what self-knowledge have you gained from the 100% disagreement that your thread has produced? 

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I watched all of those videos you linked, in succession. I can't say I got much out of it. just feeling despision and horror. Also kind of helpless.

 

I don't think freedomainradio forums are in need of enlightenment about the cruelty of (certain) mothers I might be wrong, but i really doubt it.

 

So yeah, im not sure if this was helpful. Feel more paralysed than empowered. That's me though.

 

Read or listen to the free audio book of Origins of War in Child Abuse. There have been a couple of parts so far that almost made me vomit. It's in the free books section on this website. These videos are terrible, to be sure, but hearing about the naked history of cannibalism, infanticide, torture and sexual molestation of children brings the baser nature of humans into sharper focus.

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Read or listen to the free audio book of Origins of War in Child Abuse. There have been a couple of parts so far that almost made me vomit. It's in the free books section on this website. These videos are terrible, to be sure, but hearing about the naked history of cannibalism, infanticide, torture and sexual molestation of children brings the baser nature of humans into sharper focus.

Did you read the whole book?

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Did you read the whole book?

 

Not yet. I've gradually listened through chapter seven of the audio book. It's not a very easy listen. It makes me wonder how close some of the parents in the linked videos were to killing and eating their own children, or how many of them have been raped and molested behind closed doors. A little over a year ago, my girlfriend and I were sitting her friend's six month old girl. I remember her marveling at how good the baby smelled and that she wanted to eat it. This book has totally altered that memory for me.

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If you are trying to incite anger as some people have suggested and railed against, I must mention that it had said intended effect on me but I am not upset about it. I don't see a problem with being made to feel angry about something disgusting. In fact, having been through a pretty peaceful childhood (but instead one full of the 'silent abuse' of neglect and very bad decisions by parents) it helps me to understand the rage and disgust people feel toward child abusers when they have experienced such abuse in their lives.

 

That and, for some reason which I'm not sure of but I'd love it if anyone else has an idea and could tell me, I seem to get some satisfaction out of metaphorically floor slamming abusers and their supporters with very vindictive and on-point comments. It gratifies my 'Gus' violent/manipulative altar. Is that sadistic of me?

 

The videos simply geared me up and are helping me flex my teaching skills. If I am to follow my desired path of psychology and helping spread the word of the abject horror and evil of child abuse and the way it is so entrenched in society then this kind of anger acts as a good motivator.

 

Please though, if anyone is reading this and I am coming across in a particularly negative way I'd love to know.

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Ask any woman who has been close to a baby. They will tell you that the child smells wonderful to them, almost like food. I don't expect that any woman would actually follow through with this instinct, but it's there in our biology, a throwback from the animal kingdom.

 

Have you ever heard a woman say to a child, "You are so cute that I could just gobble you up."?

 

http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/why-do-you-want-to-eat-your-baby/

http://www.babble.com/dad/talking-to-babies-things-parents-say/

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