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Posted

hrmmm correct me if I'm wrong but it seems to me like you did that whole thing to slip in a criticism under the guise of a joke.  are you suggesting that Stef cannot criticize spanking boys because he only has a daughter and not a son?

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Posted

hrmmm correct me if I'm wrong but it seems to me like you did that whole thing to slip in a criticism under the guise of a joke.  are you suggesting that Stef cannot criticize spanking boys because he only has a daughter and not a son?

 

No, I didn't make the video, I thought it was funny. I also don't think Steph would discount someones statement based on their childhood experiences. It is an exaggerated version of Steph which I thought made it funny.

 

This has got to be the most serious forums ever concocted. 

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Posted

I always found it funny that some conversations do evolve to the childhood question, but never ha ha funny, let alone worth poking fun in this kinda way. It's not making fun of a specific caller, but it seems to be insulting all the callers who do used to call in for abstract subjects to cover up the childhood stuff they wanted to really unload about. Empathy, bro. Empathy.

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Posted

I always found it funny that some conversations do evolve to the childhood question, but never ha ha funny, let alone worth poking fun in this kinda way. It's not making fun of a specific caller, but it seems to be insulting all the callers who do used to call in for abstract subjects to cover up the childhood stuff they wanted to really unload about. Empathy, bro. Empathy.

 

It is making fun of Stefan, not the caller. The caller is made out to be the level headed one throughout the entire conversation. It's a joke, thanks for trying to make me feel bad though.

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Posted

This has got to be the most serious forums ever concocted. 

 

Considering this was your stance before anybody even had the chance to reply, this says more about you than it does the forums or any of its members. Seriously, you're 3 for 3 with being confrontational. Is that how you think that win-win interactions look? Or are you not interested in the other person benefiting from the interaction?

 

The puppet and some of the mannerisms were amusing. But the whole touch your own butthole thing was Adam Sandler level not funny. It was so off-putting, I found it hard to enjoy anything beyond that.

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Posted

I found the first half to be funny. It had enough heightening or exaggeration to be funny.

 

The second half wasn't exaggerated enough to be comedic, which I think is the reason people think that this is criticism of Stefan - as if his opinions on daycare and spanking are so absurd that the person making the video didn't think they required much exaggeration to be funny

 

.

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Posted

I didn't find this very funny and not because the jokes were bad but because a lot of stuff people call into the show about are pretty screwed up. I've learned from watching the show that making light of these situations isn't very healthy. This would have been great if he made fun of Steph's corny jokes or baldness or whatever but I didn't find the all the childhood jokes very funny. Maybe I am just bias because my childhood was screwed up but I dont think I'm too far off from thinking objectively here.

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Posted

Considering this was your stance before anybody even had the chance to reply, this says more about you than it does the forums or any of its members. Seriously, you're 3 for 3 with being confrontational. Is that how you think that win-win interactions look? Or are you not interested in the other person benefiting from the interaction?

 

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with confrontation, I think it livens up the forums and encourages honesty. I also didn't think that this video was offensive to the callers because it focused on Stefan being over-the-top and not the caller, so I am sorry if it came off that way.

 

I just think it is important to not take the world too seriously all of the time.

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Posted

I just think it is important to not take the world too seriously all of the time.

You know, all I said was "not funny".

 

I don't understand how that makes me uptight, but it's just kind of funny that you say that you are all about being confrontational, but that you don't think people should take things too seriously. Since confrontation is exactly synonymous with taking things seriously, I don't know how anyone wins this game with you. You set up the rules for yourself to break, but everybody else, is wrong and uptight.

 

It's just sort of ridiculous isn't it? Can you laugh at yourself and the delicious irony? Or are you going to be uptight?

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Posted

 

 

I just think it is important to not take the world too seriously all of the time.

 

Don't you get it, Kevin?  He's so concerned that we take everything way too seriously all the time, and he's just here to help us lighten up. 

 

Because he's, you know, concerned for us:)

 

----------------------

 

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Concern_troll

 

"A concern troll visits sites of an opposing ideology and offers advice on how they could "improve" things, either in their tactical use of rhetoric, site rules, or with more philosophical consistency."

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Posted

You know, all I said was "not funny".

 

I don't understand how that makes me uptight, but it's just kind of funny that you say that you are all about being confrontational, but that you don't think people should take things too seriously. Since confrontation is exactly synonymous with taking things seriously, I don't know how anyone wins this game with you. You set up the rules for yourself to break, but everybody else, is wrong and uptight.

 

It's just sort of ridiculous isn't it? Can you laugh at yourself and the delicious irony? Or are you going to be uptight?

Not funny...

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Posted

You know, all I said was "not funny".

 

I don't understand how that makes me uptight, but it's just kind of funny that you say that you are all about being confrontational, but that you don't think people should take things too seriously. Since confrontation is exactly synonymous with taking things seriously, I don't know how anyone wins this game with you. You set up the rules for yourself to break, but everybody else, is wrong and uptight.

 

It's just sort of ridiculous isn't it? Can you laugh at yourself and the delicious irony? Or are you going to be uptight?

 

 

Confrontation is not a synonym of seriousness, you are doing it wrong. Also one does not have to choose between 100% confrontation all of the time or 100% funnies all of the time. You are looking into this too much.

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Posted

Confrontation is not a synonym of seriousness

 

Maybe not, but seriousness is a requisite of HEALTHY confrontation. You must be serious and indeed invested into something if you are to confront it in a healthy fashion.

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with confrontation

 

When you said "don't get worked up" in the INITIAL post, what was it that you were confronting? You are correct that there's nothing inherently wrong with confrontation, but being confrontational in the absence of stimulus is unhealthy and manipulative. It speaks of a bias that you don't appear to be in touch with or if you are, you were not directly forthcoming about. In the context of this bias, your confrontations are a form of an attack, which you continue to make from behind the prejudicial shield that anybody that can recognize as such must have a stick up their ass and in fact be the problem, letting you off the hook.

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Posted

Confrontation is not a synonym of seriousness, you are doing it wrong. Also one does not have to choose between 100% confrontation all of the time or 100% funnies all of the time. You are looking into this too much.

If confrontation isn't a synonym of seriousness, what is it? How is it wrong to say confrontation is serious? Also, it's true that you don't have to choose between total seriousness and total joking, but isn't it up to us to decided which way to react in different situations? If you found the video funny, that's fine; if Kevin didn't find it funny, that's fine too, and there's nothing wrong with saying so either way if it's just a preference. It's not like there's a "right" way to have a subjective opinion.

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Posted

Maybe not, but seriousness is a requisite of HEALTHY confrontation. You must be serious and indeed invested into something if you are to confront it in a healthy fashion.

 

I think that is correct, it is unhealthy to not take confrontation seriously when there is a serious issue at hand and a person is vulnerable, but I didn't see this video as causing emotional harm to anyone. Maybe I am wrong?

 

 

When you said "don't get worked up" in the INITIAL post, what was it that you were confronting? You are correct that there's nothing inherently wrong with confrontation, but being confrontational in the absence of stimulus is unhealthy and manipulative. It speaks of a bias that you don't appear to be in touch with or if you are, you were not directly forthcoming about. In the context of this bias, your confrontations are a form of an attack, which you continue to make from behind the prejudicial shield that anybody that can recognize as such must have a stick up their ass and in fact be the problem, letting you off the hook.

 

Yes, I assumed a lot of the community members may have found it offensive because they put Stefan on such a high pedestal, which I don't think is healthy. I genuinely enjoyed the video, it made me laugh, I thought others could enjoy the same sensation. 

 

I can see now how my prerequisite of "don't get worked up" may have been offensive and I apologize for that.  

If confrontation isn't a synonym of seriousness, what is it? How is it wrong to say confrontation is serious? Also, it's true that you don't have to choose between total seriousness and total joking, but isn't it up to us to decided which way to react in different situations? If you found the video funny, that's fine; if Kevin didn't find it funny, that's fine too, and there's nothing wrong with saying so either way if it's just a preference. It's not like there's a "right" way to have a subjective opinion.

 

That's true, but people started questioning whether or not I have empathy and claiming they knew my true intentions of posting the video, I felt I needed to clarify and defend myself.

south-park-rabble-rabble-rabbl-53b58d315

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Posted
That's true, but people started questioning whether or not I have empathy and claiming they knew my true intentions of posting the video, I felt I needed to clarify and defend myself.

 

 

I question your empathy for posting this video.  That video is clearly a passive aggressive attempt to shame people for taking a strong ethical stance on hitting children.  If you think that it brought humor, or lulz, into this community than you clearly have a problem empathizing with this community.

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Posted

I always found it funny that some conversations do evolve to the childhood question, but never ha ha funny, let alone worth poking fun in this kinda way. It's not making fun of a specific caller, but it seems to be insulting all the callers who do used to call in for abstract subjects to cover up the childhood stuff they wanted to really unload about. Empathy, bro. Empathy.

I gotta agree with what rainbow said. I personally felt a little insulted since I have called into the show before. And I dont think anyone think you have no empathy because you wouldn't be here. But I think it says something. What exactly I dont know im no therapist so I try not to diagnose people but it does make me uneasy.

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Posted

Confrontation is not a synonym of seriousness, you are doing it wrong. Also one does not have to choose between 100% confrontation all of the time or 100% funnies all of the time. You are looking into this too much.

This is entirely too serious of a response. You need to relax, man.

 

And if you are not taking confrontation seriously, then it's you who's doing it wrong. I mean, wouldn't that just be insane to be casually confronting people about things you don't care about? What a weirdo! ;)

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Posted

Maybe not, but seriousness is a requisite of HEALTHY confrontation. You must be serious and indeed invested into something if you are to confront it in a healthy fashion.

 

 

When you said "don't get worked up" in the INITIAL post, what was it that you were confronting? You are correct that there's nothing inherently wrong with confrontation, but being confrontational in the absence of stimulus is unhealthy and manipulative. It speaks of a bias that you don't appear to be in touch with or if you are, you were not directly forthcoming about. In the context of this bias, your confrontations are a form of an attack, which you continue to make from behind the prejudicial shield that anybody that can recognize as such must have a stick up their ass and in fact be the problem, letting you off the hook.

Ha ha, he knew that the majority of this board cannot process comedy, and he was right. You are going way to deep to find a way to get a "gotcha moment" by hanging on his latter statements about confrontation. He knew ahead of time the thoughtless and unemphatic responses he would get that did not recognize his intent. Which was also right there in his INITIAL post, "Its a joke, for the lul" as long as we are focusing so intently on the OP. Intent means something and you are working really hard here to obfuscate that. Disregarding intent is very un-empathetic.

 

I find this board is rampant with this. People kinda want to emulate stef and catch people up on their own words. And so they should, but not at the expense of another intent and just to notch your "logic and reason" belt. Because after all it is not logical nor reasonable to disregard anothers intent in these discussions. In minority this is a good board, and I am 100% team FDR till I die, howeverut this forum is very disappointing in this regard.

 

Now look down at all the negative reps I got for expressing my experience. Case and point. I really urge this community to really think about the way they interact with unpopular ideas here and criticisms of FDR subjects in general. It just is my experience that yes, some people should be expelled from this community, but that also other people who should not be expelled are being expelled because some kind of rigid group mentality. Bad communication and people with bad intent should be rejected. Totally. But good communicators with virtuous intent are rejected because they differ in peripheral ways or are willing to play devils advocate and entertain a controversial idea to the majority here.

 

I take full responsibility for my expectations of this board. But I must share my experience, I am very disappointed.

 

Now this is just my fantasy, just my imagination. But if Stefan had an alternate account here and posted anonymously he would challenge  enough people here and bring enough new perspectives that I am so confident he would get negative reps and feedback. Just my over active mental creativity. 

 

Now let the un-empathetic responses ensue...

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Posted

This is entirely too serious of a response. You need to relax, man.

 

And if you are not taking confrontation seriously, then it's you who's doing it wrong. I mean, wouldn't that just be insane to be casually confronting people about things you don't care about? What a weirdo! ;)

 

I used the word "funnies", not sure how you interpreted that as "too serious of a response". Then you tell me I need to relax as if I am some irate madman defending a hand puppet.

 

Then the next sentence you tell me I am a weirdo for not taking confrontations serious enough? Do I need to relax or be more serious? it seems I lose either way. I just wanted to share the funny hand puppet video...

I question your empathy for posting this video.  That video is clearly a passive aggressive attempt to shame people for taking a strong ethical stance on hitting children.  If you think that it brought humor, or lulz, into this community than you clearly have a problem empathizing with this community.

 

hitting kids is horrible and wrong. The guy who made the video said the same thing in the comments. I don't think he intended to undermine that, he was making fun of Stefans personality.

 

I gotta agree with what rainbow said. I personally felt a little insulted since I have called into the show before. And I dont think anyone think you have no empathy because you wouldn't be here. But I think it says something. What exactly I dont know im no therapist so I try not to diagnose people but it does make me uneasy.

 

I didn't make the video, but my interpretation of the video is that it was making fun of Stefan and his funny quirks about him, not so much the caller. I'm sorry my intentions weren't to insult you.

I gotta agree with what rainbow said. I personally felt a little insulted since I have called into the show before. And I dont think anyone think you have no empathy because you wouldn't be here. But I think it says something. What exactly I dont know im no therapist so I try not to diagnose people but it does make me uneasy.

 

I didn't make the video, but my interpretation of the video is that it was making fun of Stefan and his funny quirks about him, not so much the caller. I'm sorry my intentions weren't to insult you.

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Posted
 

Yes, I assumed a lot of the community members may have found it offensive because they put Stefan on such a high pedestal, which I don't think is healthy.

 

I agree that hero worship is unhealthy. The ideas that Stef talks about are way more important than Stef himself, which he's stated himself many MANY times. But I also understand that victims are groomed to follow as a form of their erasure. When one begins to pursue self-knowledge, it can be challenging to not become attached to the person who delivered the message that helped free them. That's something they need to work through and I don't think taking a bat over their head and saying "umadbro?" is the way to do it.

 

If you experienced anxiety over how much of this hero worship you feel to be present to the point of creating a thread, why not share this observation? You could share your acceptance of your own capacity for error. You could express curiosity if whether the anxiety you're experiencing is due to observing the uncanny or because you have unprocessed trauma yourself? Instead, you passive-aggressively posted a video that you claim you didn't make (artificially removing yourself from the chain of causality) and even went so far as to tell people their responses were invalid before they could even experience a response.

 

I would say the problem isn't that others are too serious, but that you aren't serious enough about interacting with others in a win-win fashion.

 

I felt I needed to clarify and defend myself.


south-park-rabble-rabble-rabbl-53b58d315

 

Another great example of what I'm talking about. In order to defend yourself, you must first be under an attack. To label somebody sharing their experience as an attack on you is incredibly manipulative. Also, I happen to be a fan of South Park. I understand that the show is from the perspective of children and that the adults are often portrayed as irrational, ineffective, and naive. You are again being passive-aggressive by proxy by generalizing anybody that has a different opinion than you as the adults on South Park gathered to ineffectively deal with a "problem" they don't understand.

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Posted

I gotta agree with what rainbow said. I personally felt a little insulted since I have called into the show before. And I dont think anyone think you have no empathy because you wouldn't be here. But I think it says something. What exactly I dont know im no therapist so I try not to diagnose people but it does make me uneasy.

I didn't make the video, but my interpretation of the video is that it was making fun of Stefan and his funny quirks about him, not so much the caller. I'm sorry my intentions weren't to insult you.

 

Don't you get it, Kevin?  He's so concerned that we take everything way too seriously all the time, and he's just here to help us lighten up. 

 

Because he's, you know, concerned for us:)

 

----------------------

 

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Concern_troll

 

"A concern troll visits sites of an opposing ideology and offers advice on how they could "improve" things, either in their tactical use of rhetoric, site rules, or with more philosophical consistency."

 

 

How passive aggressive, check my previous posts if you think I am a "concern troll".

 

Thanks for all of the insults everyone.

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Posted

 

Another great example of what I'm talking about. In order to defend yourself, you must first be under an attack. To label somebody sharing their experience as an attack on you is incredibly manipulative. Also, I happen to be a fan of South Park. I understand that the show is from the perspective of children and that the adults are often portrayed as irrational, ineffective, and naive. You are again being passive-aggressive by proxy by generalizing anybody that has a different opinion than you as the adults on South Park gathered to ineffectively deal with a "problem" they don't understand.

 

 

I feel like I am under attack, I have been called several names and I have apologized several times. The South Park reference was for the mob-like mentality which I perceive is present in this thread, you are again claiming to know what I "really meant" by posting the South Park picture and don't really give a shit about my responses. You know better than me my dark, vindictive, evil intentions, lol. I feel as though you are being judgmental, I love FDR and think it offers wonderful ideas. I am not out to hurt anyone, just wanted to share a video that I though was funny after listening to many podcasts I thought it was a good parody.

Ha ha, he knew that the majority of this board cannot process comedy, and he was right. You are going way to deep to find a way to get a "gotcha moment" by hanging on his latter statements about confrontation. He knew ahead of time the thoughtless and unemphatic responses he would get that did not recognize his intent. Which was also right there in his INITIAL post, "Its a joke, for the lul" as long as we are focusing so intently on the OP. Intent means something and you are working really hard here to obfuscate that. Disregarding intent is very un-empathetic.

 

I find this board is rampant with this. People kinda want to emulate stef and catch people up on their own words. And so they should, but not at the expense of another intent and just to notch your "logic and reason" belt. Because after all it is not logical nor reasonable to disregard anothers intent in these discussions. In minority this is a good board, and I am 100% team FDR till I die, howeverut this forum is very disappointing in this regard.

 

Now look down at all the negative reps I got for expressing my experience. Case and point. I really urge this community to really think about the way they interact with unpopular ideas here and criticisms of FDR subjects in general. It just is my experience that yes, some people should be expelled from this community, but that also other people who should not be expelled are being expelled because some kind of rigid group mentality. Bad communication and people with bad intent should be rejected. Totally. But good communicators with virtuous intent are rejected because they differ in peripheral ways or are willing to play devils advocate and entertain a controversial idea to the majority here.

 

I take full responsibility for my expectations of this board. But I must share my experience, I am very disappointed.

 

Now this is just my fantasy, just my imagination. But if Stefan had an alternate account here and posted anonymously he would challenge  enough people here and bring enough new perspectives that I am so confident he would get negative reps and feedback. Just my over active mental creativity. 

 

Now let the un-empathetic responses ensue...

 

Thank you, my intent was to share laughter, but I knew that anything insulting Stefan may cause an uprising. I was hoping that it would be more balanced. I am pretty sure Stefan would laugh at this :)

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Posted

 

Thank you, my intent was to share laughter, but I knew that anything insulting Stefan may cause an uprising. I was hoping that it would be more balanced. I am pretty sure Stefan would laugh at this :)

 

I find it amusing that you posted someone else's video, and then got defensive when third parties didn't find the video to be all that funny. Why would you feel attacked when it's not your creation? Even if it was, you should be able to take constructive criticism with an air of graciousness. If it's not funny, then it's not the end of the world.

 

For the record, I chuckled at the video a few times. 

Posted

Ha ha, he knew that the majority of this board cannot process comedy, and he was right.

 

 

If he really knew that the majority of this board cannot process comedy, then he wouldn't have used comedy as either the sole or primary means of communicating with us. To do this is like first knowing that a guy doesn't speak English, and then speaking to him in English about something important in front of a large crowd of people. 

 

I could easily see someone doing that to make fun of, or look down upon, the non-English speaker - but I could never see someone doing that to enlighten the non-English speaker. 

 

 

 

But good communicators with virtuous intent are rejected because they differ in peripheral ways or are willing to play devils advocate and entertain a controversial idea to the majority here.

 

I'm confused.  WHO are the good communicators with virtuous intent who being rejected?"

 

Give specific dates and times, please.  Because otherwise, you're not being a good communicator, nor are you communicating the virtue of your intent. 

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Posted

Thank you, my intent was to share laughter, but I knew that anything insulting Stefan may cause an uprising. I was hoping that it would be more balanced. I am pretty sure Stefan would laugh at this :)

 I think insults of Stefan, or anyone, should be addressed. I just can't connect with any of the given arguments on how this is offensive/insulting to Stef or FDR. Can someone explain it to me?

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Posted

Addendum to my other post:

 

Also, you presented the video in such a way that you presupposed that people may not like it.

 

Its a joke, for the lulz, don't get all worked up.

 

"Don't get all worked up" is a passive aggressive command. It's as if you are telling us that if we don't find it funny, it's our problem. The claim that it was your intent to share laughter isn't an honest one.

Posted

I feel like I am under attack, I have been called several names

 

I double checked and you weren't called a name once. We're done here.

 

Ha ha, he knew that the majority of this board cannot process comedy, and he was right.

 

I've never met a person that didn't find SOMETHING funny. WHAT we find funny is subjective while "cannot process comedy" is an objective claim.

 

Now let the un-empathetic responses ensue...

 

It's kind of awe-inspiring to watch manipulators pick up on certain words and use them in their attempts to manipulate others. How empathetic is it to say that anybody that disagrees with you must not be empathetic? Determining what something is before partaking of it is the very definition of prejudice.

 

I see lots of people enjoying humor on these forums. I just don't find lack of self-knowledge or rational thought as the result of having been abused as something to make light of.

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