How do you guys pick friends?

[TheKiosk94]

As a shy introverted person in college, I'm finding it increasingly tempting to have no standards for interactions when taking with people. It seems so much easier to make "friends" that way. I realized that if you have too many standards, you tend to have a harder time making friends. So, I've lowered my standards to a couple basic ones. I generally pick friends based on their parenting views and whether they have any virtues or not themselves. So, as a result I've had to drop some friends. I'm considering lowering my standards, because I'll have an "easier" time making friends. I'm finding it easier time having conversations with strangers though. It's also increasingly tempting to be a narcissistic douchebag, in my college, because they seem to have a lot friends and are shy. Their also douchier than some extroverted people in my school. So, for making friends, my body tells me to lower my standards, but my brain says no. So, how have you guys picked friends? Is it based on certain interests? Do you guys value ones over others? Do you guys lower your standards depending on which community your in? What's the thinking process done here?

[Jeridan Kowal]

I guess it depends on what you're willing to sacrifice? 

I myself don't have that many friends at all for this reason. It became an increasing challenge to be around people with whom I had a very shallow connection.
Few things are worse than being alone in a room of people.

 

I don't know if I have a process or check list for friendship. I tend to just observe how my feelings arise around other people.
Do they ask me questions about myself? Are they kind or have some form of empathy? What do they tend to talk about?

I made friendships with different people over the years just out of necessity. They were generally nice and played the board games/video games I played and we had a lot of fun.
I had a difficult time at home and having those friends as an outlet to be more free than my home life was crucial.
But when I started to dig into philosophy and self knowledge, the desire to be around those people faded away.
Their disinterest in philosophy made me disinterested in them.

 

So, do what you feel you want to do to keep your sanity. Being in college you probably need a good network of people to do well.
See what happens to your desires regarding quality and over time your friendships will follow accordingly.