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An open question - is it problematic for children to play with toy guns or make-believe guns?

I was with some friends who have kids last night, and I was playing with their 4-year-old son, when he made his hands into the shape of a gun, and I tried to dodge the bullets matrix style, but his mom stopped him and reminded him of their rule that "we don't play with guns" or something like that.  I can certainly sympathize with this, as you don't necessarily want a kid to normalize shooting at someone, but I am also aware of the hysteria about this kind of thing, Christina Hoff Sommers details in "The War on Boys" how kids are suspended for this kind of play, which is really harmless.  Just curious what people on this board think about it.

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An open question - is it problematic for children to play with toy guns or make-believe guns?

 

I was with some friends who have kids last night, and I was playing with their 4-year-old son, when he made his hands into the shape of a gun, and I tried to dodge the bullets matrix style, but his mom stopped him and reminded him of their rule that "we don't play with guns" or something like that.  I can certainly sympathize with this, as you don't necessarily want a kid to normalize shooting at someone, but I am also aware of the hysteria about this kind of thing, Christina Hoff Sommers details in "The War on Boys" how kids are suspended for this kind of play, which is really harmless.  Just curious what people on this board think about it.

 

No, in an of itself it is a reflection of modern media. What is critically important is the "coming of age" moment when the toy guns are put away and the required knowledge, skills, and attitude of safety and responsibility are taken on. Toy guns can be reintroduced once this coming of age moment is passed, but only if the maturity level is there. When this goes wrong is when a child is given a BB gun and no instruction and they just start shooting everything like they saw on TV.

 

Women are taught by the media that all guns are bad, as it is a totem of oppression of some sort, instead of empowerment. This mother appears to have drunk the koolaid. I blame movies like A Christmas Story for demonstrating an incorrect method and then underscoring it with an immediate bad result.

 

ObligatoryBackground: Used to teach Boy and Girl Scouts how to get their Rifle and Shotgun merit badges in a 75-150 participant camp.

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Firearms prevent crime even if you do not own one, but the effect is more pronounced if you do. Children should be taught how to handle firearms safely, for this reason, since they are likely to find one eventually, perhaps while playing at a friend's house if not in your own home.

 

Obviously, a toy gun is not a real firearm, but a facsimile. A child of four or five would understand the difference if you take the time to teach it. This is a prime example of lazy leftist parenting. I don't understand how firearms work, and they're unsafe, so I'll be damned if my kid even plays with toys shaped like them.

 

My father kept three handguns in the house while I was growing up. He tried to show me how to use one of them while he was shooting at targets with his father and brother. I didn't have ear protection on and was scared by the noise, so I refused. He should have showed me the unloaded weapon when I was younger, and told me about all the safety precautions that gun owners use, but he's a lazy leftist parent.

 

1. Use eye and ear protection.

2. Never point a firearm at something you don't intend to shoot, even unloaded.

3. Unload your weapon before you hand it to someone or clean it.

 

There are more but these are the important ones.

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Another one worth adding to the important list (for children):

 

4. Never handle a firearm without an adult's supervision.

 

Thankfully, my father did a good job demystifying firearms. Safety rules and the reasons for them were always clear to us. They were common tools. Dangerous tools, but tools just the same. If we ever wanted to see one of his guns, he'd be happy to stop what he was doing to show us proper handling and took us shooting with age appropriate calibers. I've heard of some asshole parents having their young children use high-powered rifles their first time shooting either because it was "funny" for them or to scare the kids away from guns.

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In my experience, most people who believe that guns are so dangerous that they are a plague on mankind have zero experience with them outside of movies and TV. Those that fall into that crowd will often find their minds changing if they take a few minutes to understand the thing they have vilified and even enjoy shooting if you can get them to the range. The key to dealing with this mindset is the same as teaching a child a new topic: Start slow and simple and don't get agitated. 

 

I was introduced to the discipline fairly young and learned early the importance of the rules:

 

1) Treat every firearm as if it were loaded.

2) Never point a weapon at anything you don't intend to destroy.

3) Keep the weapon on safe until you're ready to fire.

4) Keep your finger straight and off the trigger until you intend to fire.

 

Unofficial rule: Know your target and what lies beyond.

 

(The first 2 rules are the ones that really count. Everything else is just reinforcement for when you disregard the application of the first 2.)

 

I started my son on firearm safety at 3. At that age, I taught him the rules above, but the only rule he needed to follow was "don't touch it, go get dad or grandpa." As he's gotten older, we've built upon the foundation and he's now at an age where he is able to handle a firearm safely. As with all things in life, it's all in the education and preparation. 

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  I appreciate the feedback, and I agree that proper firearm use could be an important part of a some kid's education.  What is a realistic time-frame for this?  In other words, at what ages is it reasonable to introduce various aspects of guns and shooting?

 With the parents in question, he is a 4 year-old, and there's no way these people will ever teach him to use a gun.  My question was more specifically about whether it is sensible to teach a kid not to shoot at people, even in play, or is this part of the general hysteria around boys playing "rough"?  Btw, he is allowed to rough-house.

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  I appreciate the feedback, and I agree that proper firearm use could be an important part of a some kid's education.  What is a realistic time-frame for this?  In other words, at what ages is it reasonable to introduce various aspects of guns and shooting?

 

 With the parents in question, he is a 4 year-old, and there's no way these people will ever teach him to use a gun.  My question was more specifically about whether it is sensible to teach a kid not to shoot at people, even in play, or is this part of the general hysteria around boys playing "rough"?  Btw, he is allowed to rough-house.

 

As soon as a child is able to differentiate between preferable and undesirable action, it's time to educate. To put this in perspective, my nephew came upon my brother's carry pistol, which was "secured" in a CCW bag. Despite being 3 at the time, he was able to open the zipper and discharge the weapon which was still in the bag. Thankfully, my brother was the only casualty as the bullet passed through both of his feet. Due to a negligence to teach his son about firearms, my brother had to undergo 3 surgeries and countless hours of physical therapy and my nephew suffered at-this-point unknown levels of trauma. That experience only served to reinforce my opinion that there is no such thing as too much firearm education and it can't be started too early.

 

My opinion on whether or not to teach kids to abstain from "shooting" people in play is mixed. I played guns with most of the neighborhood kids and have never had the desire to actually shoot anyone. Even when it was my job to do so, I avoided it whenever practicable. My belief is that play shooting leads to actual violence the same way violent video games leads to real-world violence. 

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