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What is it like to be exceptional at your technical skill?


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If you have experience, intelligence, tenacity, or other factors that make you really good at a technical skill what is that like for you? Are there things you can do that others can't? How do people react to what you can do? Do you know anyone who is way better than you at that skill?

 

Anything else you want to add I would be pleased to hear about.

 

Thank you!

 

-TC

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It feels damn good to be awesome at guitar. I can do some chord tapping riffs, lightning fast heavy ones, and I can even write songs. Plenty of them. People are impressed at how original they sound. When I used to play coffee shops gigs, I was maybe one of the few, if not only, performer who had any sense of crescendo. My songs weren't just ME STRUM HARD, ME YELL LYRICS!!! I actually have control over my sense of volume and song structure, meaning I didn't repeat the same four chords throughout an entire song. My songs consist of several many parts that don't follow the mainstream structure, but of course without risking the loss of accessibility.

 

It has been a while since anyone ever expressed any distaste like "friggin show off" or whatever so I dunno what that's like anymore.

 

However, there is someone who is better than me at guitar, and that's my guitarist for my band. I play guitar solo, but bass in a band, and this guy, although not normally a song writer, can do some amazing solos that really speak to you and flow freely throughout a musical bar. My solos? Ehhh they lack freedom and variety. I use the same kind of note shapes and stuff all the time. Sorry if this all sounds super abstract and foreign, but this is a great post that really got me thinking. Anyway, yeah. My guitarist is way better than me at guitar because he's had formal training and can play many more styles than I can. And on time. Most songs are in a 4/4 beat, and he's able to come up with stuff that conform to that time signature...while the songs I wrote for myself have odd time signatures, hence I am Mathrock/Pop writer on my own time, but simplify my style on bass when I have other people to play with.

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My solos? Ehhh they lack freedom and variety. I use the same kind of note shapes and stuff all the time.

I feel you on that. As a piano player I feel like I'm always playing the same things when I improvise.

I kinda wonder if even the very best musicians feel that way because the more you know the more you understand exactly where a particular phrase comes from...

 

On the other hand I've heard enough stoned or drunk idiots in "jam bands" playing randomly because they don't really know anything about what they're doing. They probably should be aware they're playing the same stuff over and over, but they aren't.

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I feel you on that. As a piano player I feel like I'm always playing the same things when I improvise.

I kinda wonder if even the very best musicians feel that way because the more you know the more you understand exactly where a particular phrase comes from...

 

On the other hand I've heard enough stoned or drunk idiots in "jam bands" playing randomly because they don't really know anything about what they're doing. They probably should be aware they're playing the same stuff over and over, but they aren't.

 

Sometimes playing the same thing over and over is better, in terms of melodies if it's catchy, vs 1 million meaningless and unmemorable notes.

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I'm very good at programming, been doing it since I was 8. Solutions to complex problems come to me easily, and I can write a significantly larger amount of code in the same time as other programmers in our company. In the past, when I was working at a startup I partially owned, I exploited this ability to give us a competitive edge. At the moment, I'm working for a huge company, and I'm using my abilities to manage my work/life balance instead, working fewer hours to achieve the productivity that's expected of me.

 

People usually react to what I can do with disinterest, and with not having a clue about it.

 

There are people who are way better at programming than I am, especially certain aspects of it. Computer science is a wide field, and let's say optimizing vector assembly code or GPGPU kernels is a different skill than designing a new algorithm from scratch to solve a particular problem. I'm good at the latter, not so much the former.

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It's quite alienating, most people think that being really really smart is a good thing, it isn't. I don't fit well into society and feel like an alien walking around.

 

I can relate to this.  :pinch:

 

I know it's a bit cliche, but if you find folks whom are smart at the same and/or other subjects that complement you and your talents (maybe even "renaissance" people), alienation becomes connection.

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I've been very fortunate recently to work at a company where I can use some of the skills I've built up in pursuing my hobbies.

 

Our company has a song that they've been using for years that gets on everyone's nerves. This afternoon I made a new replacement. It was easy because I've been doing audio/music production for years as a hobby.

 

I've also developed an app for our company because I'm good with computers and have wanted to learn programming for many years.

 

These aren't projects they asked for, but I am given time to pursue them and the results are appreciated.

 

I am also better at our main job than my colleagues... But they don't care because my being good isn't bad for them, and I'm always willing to help out.

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I am by no means equating my talent to that of Mozart's. Or even Salieri's for that matter.

 

But for a very few people, a 'thing' can just come naturally. I also see this as spectrum sort of thing in that it's not a "you've either got it or you don't" situation. We can all tap into creativity it seems, just at different 'levels'.

 

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Hmm...I guess another thing I can mention is my ability to connect with customers at either of my jobs. I haven't had jobby jobs for a couple years now until only 9 months ago, and striking up a conversation with customers and making a bigger sale than they intended is something I take quite pride in. But also a lot of surprise that I can do it sometimes. When I first started working, I had tremendous amounts of social anxiety. I thought I would get tongue twisted, rub people the wrong way, or say something awkward.

 

Then guess what happened?

 

have gotten tongue twisted, rubbed people the wrong way, AND said awkward things. I used to think that once I've done those things, I'm done for. No one will listen. No one will care. But lately I've been accepting that life consists of a ton of awkward moments, the trick is learning how to recover from them. So despite of all these social flaws I feared would make or break my experience and effeciency at my jobs, enacting them weren't so bad when I've learned how to recover from them. I would either make a joke about how great I am at speaking that day, apologize for what I've said or switching onto a topic that is more complimentary towards the customer, and if I've said something awkward that felt like a conversation killer, then out came some questions so that they could have their thoughts expressed--and I get to shut up and listen, thus recovering from any conversational boners. (Boners being mistakes, not topics that have aroused me or anything like that lol)

 

I've opened up to some co-workers about my social anxiety, telling them that although on the outside it looks like I'm having a fun, care free, and connected conversation with a customer, on the inside I'm dying. This was true more at the beginning where I really did feel like a fraud for being able to strike up great conversations, but on the inside wishing I knew how to end it or get away from it. I still have this self doubt to some degree, being concerned with how they perceive me, like if they're genuinely interested or just trying to be polite--but for the most part I've gotten better at reading people and knowing which customers are even open to a connected conversation. Otherwise, I don't bother, and I let them browse freely.

 

However, I did pick up a book lately on proven sales skills called Ask, Stop, and Listen: How to Turn Browsers Into Buyers, I look damn forward to reading it and seeing what wisdom I can extract and enact at my jobs. I do believe I can have the power to turn browsers into buyers if I just learned how, so that's another thing when it comes to excellence at something. Knowing that there is always room for growth and that's what I aim to do. I want to stop being in my comfort zone of only connecting with customers that give off the vibe of openness, but also see if I can pry open the shy, quiet, even sometimes downright dismissive customers.

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Hmm...I guess another thing I can mention is my ability to connect with customers at either of my jobs. I haven't had jobby jobs for a couple years now until only 9 months ago, and striking up a conversation with customers and making a bigger sale than they intended is something I take quite pride in. But also a lot of surprise that I can do it sometimes. When I first started working, I had tremendous amounts of social anxiety. I thought I would get tongue twisted, rub people the wrong way, or say something awkward.

 

Then guess what happened?

 

have gotten tongue twisted, rubbed people the wrong way, AND said awkward things. I used to think that once I've done those things, I'm done for. No one will listen. No one will care. But lately I've been accepting that life consists of a ton of awkward moments, the trick is learning how to recover from them. So despite of all these social flaws I feared would make or break my experience and effeciency at my jobs, enacting them weren't so bad when I've learned how to recover from them. I would either make a joke about how great I am at speaking that day, apologize for what I've said or switching onto a topic that is more complimentary towards the customer, and if I've said something awkward that felt like a conversation killer, then out came some questions so that they could have their thoughts expressed--and I get to shut up and listen, thus recovering from any conversational boners. (Boners being mistakes, not topics that have aroused me or anything like that lol)

 

I've opened up to some co-workers about my social anxiety, telling them that although on the outside it looks like I'm having a fun, care free, and connected conversation with a customer, on the inside I'm dying. This was true more at the beginning where I really did feel like a fraud for being able to strike up great conversations, but on the inside wishing I knew how to end it or get away from it. I still have this self doubt to some degree, being concerned with how they perceive me, like if they're genuinely interested or just trying to be polite--but for the most part I've gotten better at reading people and knowing which customers are even open to a connected conversation. Otherwise, I don't bother, and I let them browse freely.

 

However, I did pick up a book lately on proven sales skills called Ask, Stop, and Listen: How to Turn Browsers Into Buyers, I look damn forward to reading it and seeing what wisdom I can extract and enact at my jobs. I do believe I can have the power to turn browsers into buyers if I just learned how, so that's another thing when it comes to excellence at something. Knowing that there is always room for growth and that's what I aim to do. I want to stop being in my comfort zone of only connecting with customers that give off the vibe of openness, but also see if I can pry open the shy, quiet, even sometimes downright dismissive customers.

 

Two more books I'd recommend if you're interested:

 

How to have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People by Les Giblin

 

- and -

 

Jeffrey Gitomer's Little Red Book of Selling

 

Do you perhaps find that you have a "social energy-bar" that is gradually depleted over the course of a day?

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Two more books I'd recommend if you're interested:

 

How to have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People by Les Giblin

 

- and -

 

Jeffrey Gitomer's Little Red Book of Selling

 

Do you perhaps find that you have a "social energy-bar" that is gradually depleted over the course of a day?

 

Yeah. Like I can be on fire for a whole work weekend, but once I know that I have some days off, I'll be sure to just retreat to the darkness of my basement and keep to myself. I hear that's how introverts work. They/we can socialize just fine, but require solitude to rejuvinate.

 

And thanks for the suggestions! I already have a lot of books on my reading que, but I'll definitely consider those for the tail end of that list. I guess that's another thing I can work on...learning how to read more consistently so I can read more books throughout a month instead of ignoring them for days, even weeks, sometimes months, before I can finish a book and get onto the next one.

 

If you could share with me, how have those books affected you and what benefits have they given you in your life?

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Yeah. Like I can be on fire for a whole work weekend, but once I know that I have some days off, I'll be sure to just retreat to the darkness of my basement and keep to myself. I hear that's how introverts work. They/we can socialize just fine, but require solitude to rejuvinate.

 

And thanks for the suggestions! I already have a lot of books on my reading que, but I'll definitely consider those for the tail end of that list. I guess that's another thing I can work on...learning how to read more consistently so I can read more books throughout a month instead of ignoring them for days, even weeks, sometimes months, before I can finish a book and get onto the next one.

 

If you could share with me, how have those books affected you and what benefits have they given you in your life?

 

Certainly!  :turned:

 

In brief, these books function, figuratively, as two chapters in a volume about how to play the game of life; specifically, they focus on recognizing the psychology of others as well as oneself in the context of providing value and cooperating with people in the market.

 

I've used the information in Les Giblin's book to better collaborate with my peers and lead when the occasion arises -- just recently, our CEO departed for Europe and has left me to captain the ship in his absence -- and these periods occur more frequently than before.

 

I've used the information in Jeffrey Gitomer's book to better provide value through direct sales know-how. Last October, I was invited to join a friend in New York to sell comics at New York Comic Con, and for a few years prior I set up a booth at a local art walk to sell my works directly to the public.

 

If I recall correctly, both Warren Buffet and Bill Gates agree that if they could have a superpower it would be the ability to speed-read.  ;)

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