labmath2 Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 After reading Atlas Shrugged and listening to positive psychology 1504 by Tal Ben-Shahar, i realize just how much work i need to get from where i am now to a good place. Reflecting on the experience, i now think it is hard to criticize people for their choices. Sure, they have capacity for change, but change is hard. Many people choose government over integrity, not because they are blind, but because of the expediency of the moment. Try telling a single mother choose integrity over the well being if her child. It is hard to let go of the pleasant illusion when you do not know what is on the other side. I know that Stefan says it did not matter how the cotton will get picked post slavery, but it mattered to those whose life depended on it. While i hold people fully responsible for those things they chose, i look back now and can see why i made those decisions.
John Sambrook Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 Thank you for an interesting post. As I read it, I found myself wondering about this sentence: "Reflecting on the experience, i now think it is hard to criticize people for their choices." It occurred to me that perhaps we shouldn't be criticizing people for their choices, even if we disagree with them. Perhaps we should be engaging them in ways that cause them to re-evaluate their choices, without taking actions that put them on the defensive or otherwise evoke emotions that interfere with communication. I do think it's right to hold people - myself included - accountable for the decisions they make. 3
Mister Mister Posted September 19, 2015 Posted September 19, 2015 Well the problem with saying "we shouldn't criticize" is that you are kind of implicitly criticizing those who criticize, so it's kind of a UPB fail.
Susana Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 I think you guys would like "Real Time Relationships" to help answer this question. Just because you understand where someone is coming from I dont follow why this does not make you "criticize" If I see someone that is an alcoholic or something I can guess they have a fucked up life but I'm still like WTF your poisoning yourself and its sloppy! pull yourself together, you only get one chance at life! I would say that understanding exactly what happened to them makes me feel sadness, but not the "anxiety" to tell them to strive for better.
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