Learning Skills - Bicycles and Swimming pools

[Des]

I play dad to the 9yo daughter of an ex-girlfriend.

 

The 9yo has a bicycle which was mine, she is struggling to get on/off because she did not learn correct technique with the smaller bicycle I gave her some years ago.

 

I do what she asks and hold it for her repeatedly, so she can enjoy cycling on the grass. I just feel impatient, because I am pretty sure I was able to get on/off bicycles with correct technique soon after I got my first bicycle at age 9.

 

I know I learned from peers, and the peer competition aspect made learning faster for me, with cycling and with swimming. With each of these, though, I find this 9yo girl seems resistant to learning from me.

 

For me as a child, it was fun to equal or better the skills of my friends. I am looking for tips on how to make it fun for this child to improve her skill at swimming and at mounting/dismounting the bicycle, and in general, how to make the necessary but boring parts of skill aquisition, attractive. I don't think she experiences competitive desire in the same way I did.

 

The other example is that, after 3 summers swimming together, she still does not lock her knees for the styles which require that. I can't remember if, as a child, I locked my knees in response to much nagging from my mother, or if I really wanted to have good skill, and caught on without much nagging. I do know that I don't want to be a nag, and I am sure nagging/friendly reminders will fail within this context of these issues.

[AccuTron]

I didn't learn to ride a bike until my twenties.  See some other of my posts for background on that social retardation.  I do recall that if the seat is lowered below optimum riding, it is easier to mount and not immediately fall over; and can be incrementally adjusted later.  A lower seat can also make it seem more like a scooter, with feet pushing against ground, for a less scary learning period.

 

Locked knees?  What is that for?  I did learn to swim well in residential swimming pools.  I never did Australian crawl, too clunky and splashy for me, seemed horribly inefficient.  I learned from watching frogs and water beetles, what do they do?  Ain't no Australian crawl.  They have two flippers and tuck everything else in close.  

 

I managed back in my age fifties to do an entire 25-meter pool one breath underwater, by mentally calming myself; even when I "needed" to gulp air, I found I could will away the need, it was just a warning signal, not actual crisis.  Slow movements, so no wasteful eddying.  Frog-style leg kicks, slowly pulling arms up close to body and spreading for a stroke, not many of those, reminding me of how slowly sea turtles move their flippers.  Some body undulation too, but not much.   Anyone who saw that old TV show about a man from Atlantis, and how they made him swim, has the idea, but much moderated.

 

I honestly can't think of how I'd lock my knees swimming.  Years ago, we had rubber swim fins which may have had locked knees part of the stroke.  But I don't like locking my knees under stress unless it's a standing and bracing type of thing.  Maybe the girl has tight hamstrings, and it hurts.

[Des]

Thanks, Accutron.

 

I learned how to mostly stay on the bicycle, by repeatedly falling off for various reasons, occasionally, over many years. Being a child, I was lighter than now, and luckily did not break bones.

 

This child has had some years on the smaller bicycle, and can cycle just fine, it is just my preference that she mount and dismount the adult MTB with seat dropped to lowest, so we can go cycling together, off the grass and onto the roads of the suburb.

 

Locked knees allow better transmission of power from thigh muscles, for freestyle and backstroke.

http://swim.isport.com/swimming-guides/how-to-swim-freestyle

 

The problem though, is one of my not relating well with the child, and I can't help her to achieve skills better and more quickly until I can figure out how to relate better with her, for her to grasp my intent in giving her advice on skills that I already have.

[Mister Mister]

I play dad to the 9yo daughter of an ex-girlfriend.

Can you elaborate?  I get the sense this isn't about riding bicycles.

[Des]

Can you elaborate?  I get the sense this isn't about riding bicycles.

It's about relating better with the child on twice-weekly late-afternoon visits.

 

A (black, [state-attorney equivalent]) ex-gf has a child by a (white) man (not me), and I am staying in the child's life in the interests of the child. It is summer here in South Africa and we swim most times now, may sometimes cycle, will cycle in winter. She has learning problems, I'm not sure if they are IQ-related or what. Goes to a private school with therapists to assist with these learning problems.

 

I am seeing the not-really-trying to follow my suggestions, as an indication I could relate better with her. I have played with her for some years now, first while I was living with her mother, and for some years since then.

 

My son and my daughter are each married and live in New Zealand - They are happy even though I was nasty to their mother (and she to me), too often. I'm not inclined to keep in contact with them, nor they with me. My family (including my son and daughter) are christian, left as I realised there is no god, as I quit going to church, as the open-marriage idea my wife and I tried, collapsed.