FreedomPhilosophy Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 I feel lost in my life, over the last 8 years I have mostly lost connection with my older kids who live with their crazy mother, lost my house and garden, ended a professional career. I've had some therapy, but probably not enough. I suffer from anxiety, some post traumatic symptoms from a violent and unloving childhood. I'm nearly 50 and don't have financial security or see what my future is. I'm intelligent and have worked in IT for nearly 25 years, but am fed up with the 9 to 5 - that's not a life well lived. I don't know what to do. I like trading but am struggling to get restarted on that path. My girlfriend of 7 years just broke up with me because of my moods and lack of direction in life. I feel lost. I'm getting some life coaching. I need to find something that supports me financially and that makes me feel really valuable. I live in Thailand where the cost of living is low, so low income is manageable. Of course, I would like to be a "success" in all areas of my life, but that seems like an impossibility. If I could find a business partner, entrepreneur, something that I could support and that supports me, that would be great. I've tried various other things over the years and trained in massage, reading stock charts and even (ironically) tried relationship coaching with no success. I need help. 1 1
utopian Posted January 28, 2016 Posted January 28, 2016 Hey man, you seem to be pretty down. I don't have too much time to spend on any one person. Cant save everyone from everything. I can't spend all the time to prove to you that I am anything more than some dude on the internet spouting nonsense, so I would advise you that, while I offer you my two cents in generosity, take it with a grain of salt and consider getting some professional help as well. That being said, Also, this is what I do. I have a list of things I want to do with my life. One of the things I sat down to write out one day, was all the places I wanted to travel. It was quite a lot of things, and it was most likely that I will never see all those places. So after I made the first list, I made a second list, one with a narrowed down version of the best places I wanted to see. I also did this for things I wanted to DO in life, jobs I wanted to work, experiences I wanted to have etc. There is too much I want to do. I have to narrow it down to the few things I want to do the most. One of the things I want to do is, after the economic collapse, I want to create a local economic/corporate infrastructure and help/lead people back into a better position. In pursuit of my goal, I do lots of research on the subject, and write things like what can be seen in my signature. But that is just one of many examples. The point being, is we all only get so much time in our lives, and we have to make each moment count. What do you want to do with your life? If you were dead, and you got to look back at the video of your life, what will you want to have seen? Would you have done it, or would you have just wished you had done it? There are things I still have yet to do, and I might not ever do them. I have other things I can do and do do. I can't tell you what you want or need to do with your life that will make you feel fulfilled. If you have a hole in your heart and abuse as a young child, that is certainly a sign of some kind of condition you may want to have reconciled. I have it too. I work on it. But the bottom line is, no one can make you drink the water, only help lead you to it. You gotta drink the water, dig yourself out of the hole, figure out what you want to do with yourself. And you should hurry. I am younger than you, and I myself feel time slipping away.
FreedomPhilosophy Posted January 29, 2016 Author Posted January 29, 2016 Thank you, that was moving and helpful.
mahayana Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. And I'm sorry someone down voted your post. (WTF people?! really?) I hope you're able to address the root cause of your problem & find some happiness in your life.I really haven't heard much on FDR about hallucinogens & this might be looked down upon here, but have you considered trying hallucinogens as therapy? Recently I have come across some compelling articles on the benefits of using hallucinogens such as mushrooms or ayahuasca to treat depression & PTSD. (This of course would be in a controlled setting with a trusted guide) Here's one article that might interest you: "The impact is long lasting, as well. A Johns Hopkins study found that a majority of subjects who took psilocybin had personality changes that lasted for over a year. Almost all participants in another Hopkins psilocybin study said the experience was one of the most meaningful of their lives." http://reset.me/story/how-psilocybin-improves-your-brain/ If that's not at all something you would consider, here are some articles that are a good starting point for learning how to rewire your brain. http://reset.me/story/neuroplasticity-the-10-fundamentals-of-rewiring-your-brain/ https://blog.bufferapp.com/how-to-rewire-your-brains-for-positivity-and-happinessGood luck to you.
Copper_Heart Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 I would recommend to try coherence therapy: http://coherencetherapy.org/contact.htmif anything it is completely backed up by science and replicated neurological study/ies. I really haven't heard much on FDR about hallucinogens & this might be looked down upon here, but have you considered trying hallucinogens as therapy? Recently I have come across some compelling articles on the benefits of using hallucinogens such as mushrooms or ayahuasca to treat depression & PTSD. I am reading "The Body Keeps the Score" by van der Kolk, a world renown psychiatrist who researched PTSD, and what it comes down is that, while superficially one does indeed feel better, his body is keep suffering from physical manifestations of PTSD and alike.
mahayana Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 I am reading "The Body Keeps the Score" by van der Kolk, a world renown psychiatrist who researched PTSD, and what it comes down is that, while superficially one does indeed feel better, his body is keep suffering from physical manifestations of PTSD and alike. Thank you, that's good to know. I certainly wouldn't consider hallucinogens a one stop cure but perhaps in combination with therapy it could lead to some good results. It really helped me to step outside of myself & evaluate my own situation. Over 15 years later I still am completely grateful for the experience. I'm looking at the book on amazon & it looks really interesting. It looks like the author's PTSD was a result of conflict from war. Is the book relevant for someone like FreedomPhilosopher even though his PTSD stems from childhood trauma?
Copper_Heart Posted January 30, 2016 Posted January 30, 2016 It looks like the author's PTSD was a result of conflict from war. Is the book relevant for someone like FreedomPhilosopher even though his PTSD stems from childhood trauma? I would say it is a most essential book in self knowledge, it takes on a question much broader then PTSD, childhood trauma is one of the central topics of this book. I think that importance of authors work with PTSD allowed him more clear understanding of every other mental ailments. It actually talks about every thing PTSD, emotional abuse, general biology and it talks about how to cure/cope with that. Author himself comes with very substantial critique of DSM(http://www.dsm5.org/about/Pages/Default.aspx), subsequently he criticizes all diagnoses like ADHD, Bipolar Personality Disorder, Opposition Defiant Disorder(If patient disagrees with his psychiatrist it's clearly ODD! kafkaesque nightmare). He also introduces such C-PTSD(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complex_post-traumatic_stress_disorder) which in my opinion return people some humanity and obliges medical staff to treat them better then a broken lamp, and it embarks much broader population, not only war survivors. Oh my God, it has such an amazing insight, but be careful there are three versions first second kindle version third This one has over 500 reviews and is marked 5 full stars Remember to use FDR affiliate link when shopping in US, UK and Canada.
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