Undertale of Emotions

[Anuojat]

After recently going through an indie game called undertale I’ve had lots of feelings come spur inside me that seemed to melt away my cynicism about "the world". I think this is because of my 1 year in therapy, dealing with self-knowledge relentlessly and totally new and better healthy company of acquaintances and friends.

 

However the game was yet another spark that after listening the soundtrack trough also felt really good and came to this realization.

 

The track in the game that finally broke the camel’s back called "Hopes and dreams" followed by "SAVE the world"

 

And it hit me, we often speak of, wish, dream or try to save the world and fight evil or/and defend freedom trough reason evidence and logic. In my own mind i felt hopelessness about my own life and future because fundamentally i felt despair having to combat the seemingly impossible task of fighting evil. The desire in me to be good and spread goodness and to save others.

 

I believed it was not only MY job to take on evil of the world but most importantly that it was the World that needed saving. I was wrong.

 

The world is not needing of saving the "World" is cant have peace any more than sun can calm the fuck down. I was anthomorphising human corruption and evil STILL to reality itself. And when i finally said "Save the humans" or "Peace among humankind" i felt switch in my head like someone had suddenly turned the light up and shattered all the shadows around me.

 

I felt as if i didn’t NEED to save the world because it was impossible, a way of making it a false hope inside me and thus greatest source of despair. If humans are the ones in trouble and human ones that DO evil then saving the ones i can save or HELP is enough.

 

Suddenly it’s enough to help/save few because it’s no longer about being the hero that saves the world by destroying evil and overcomes all odds and come out on top. But rather about not believing in false hope or obligations that are impossible, believing in goodness that is possible for me here and now.

 

That my life, MY hopes and dreams arent in the chains of despair, of cynicism, of nihilism, of others "eye rolling and world wearyness." That my hopes and dreams, my goals, what i value is not IMPOSSIBLE TASK and forever evading me elusive like heaven or some paradise somewhere yet out of reach.

 

And the game itself Undertale deal with this notion exactly. It’s about society, childhood trauma, betrayal of innocence and origins of war. It deals with cynicism, with violence, pessimism, nihilism about goodness and is in many ways about the PROJECTION of ones experiences unto reality itself.

 

I’d recommend playing the game for its profound way to speak to your feelings while taking the fourth wall and kissing it goodbye.

 

[luxfelix]

Pacifist playthrough? 

 

If you don't mind me piggy-backing off of the topic, there's also the "medium as message" angle to Undertale; that the story is realized through the interactive medium, brings attention to questions of autonomy in a way arguably more affective than other media.

 

Edit: Any other portions in particular that filled you with "determination" 

[Anuojat]

Pacifist playthrough? 

 

If you don't mind me piggy-backing off of the topic, there's also the "medium as message" angle to Undertale; that the story is realized through the interactive medium, brings attention to questions of autonomy in a way arguably more affective than other media.

 

Edit: Any other portions in particular that filled you with "determination" 

 

 

Well besides the story and music associated iwht the chracter of Asriel, i think the fact how both "parental" characters in this game had committed the errors i see so much in the world "mothers shushing of childrens freedom and question for sopposed safety when its THEY who are afraid and wont confront that fear" and the "cynisism and sacrifices must be made but i hate myself for it" part that were adressed. It was so pleasent and liberating to witness.

 

Also the fact that the game constantly with its characters and secrets and quirks constantly is AWARE the 80s and 90s kid group its aimed at and thus as the writing is so good it make me feel like my inner child and adult self at same time in way that felt HEALING as i cried and felt strong genuine emotions in many scenes and when other players experienced the same.

 

It felt as if... id found a way to feel again like a healthy child. NOT like my abuse or neglect didnt happen but that my inner child was NOT felt behind and that i didnt become "flowey" (nihilist/cynic) or some sorrowful mix of that and my trueself. Always and forever in fight with my feelings. THAT with the depection in the game of certain child character... sealed the deal with me and i felt ALIVE.

 

That is in context to Stefans referances to zombies and undead and vampires in people.

 

 

Song for those interested, THOUGH I RECOMMEND PLAYING FIRST LISEN ONLY IF ALREADY PLAYED OR IF NEVER GONNA PLAY.

[Ed888]

Wait, are we speaking on the game with consideration to spoilers?

 

I'll assume so for now and omit accordingly.

 

Undertale was amazing, I also felt the ease and enjoyment of back when I used to just sit and watch cartoons all day. The "save the world" idea though that was common in several RPG and other video games though is kind of a misleading thing I would say to dream about as direct goal.

 

What I find fascinating is how many people on Steam I see with a key character as their icon or some way of saying they are their favorite character, and I asked several people on why they like them but every time nobody could give me any real reason. I got my hunch, but going into the depth of what I think it was goes to that "You're overthinking the game, mannn" kind of territory. Plus what I think it digs up from the past makes people reticent to wish to keep talking about it.

 

Soundtrack is fantastic and I'm still listening to it along with metal remixes when I go to the gym, my absolute favorite game of 2015.

 

 

Also the fact that the game constantly with its characters and secrets and quirks constantly is AWARE the 80s and 90s kid group its aimed at and thus as the writing is so good it make me feel like my inner child and adult self at same time in way that felt HEALING as i cried and felt strong genuine emotions in many scenes and when other players experienced the same.

 

Same feels here, extremely strong emotions and buckets of tears.