AncapFTW Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 I saw this video on youtube and, while I normally agree with this guy on most of his videos, this one seemed a bit ridiculous, especially when he said that withholding sex is a form of abuse. Personally, I don't see how it qualifies as abuse. Does anyone have any comments on his statement or the hashtag in general? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mister Mister Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 Obviously not abuse, but it's a clear exercise of female power. I have no problem with this in principle, except that we're not allowed to be honest about the sexual power that young women have over men. Can you imagine men doing this? It would never work, one after another would break like companies in a price-fixing cartel.I would add, that all this is doing is to prevent discussion. By threatening verbal abuse, accusations of racism, and now sexual ostracism against Trump supporters, you are just encouraging them to keep it secret, thereby maintaining the silent hostility between political disagreements in America. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shirgall Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 You don't want to get involved with someone that casually invokes sexual brinkmanship anyway. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eschiedler Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 The Deer in the video is using the idea that intense manipulation is abusive. It is not "obviously not" abuse. Knowing that someone will feel an intense deprivation or otherwise intense emotional reaction and then using that apparent soft spot or "weakness" is the very definition of taking actions that are psychologically abusive. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AncapFTW Posted March 29, 2016 Author Share Posted March 29, 2016 The Deer in the video is using the idea that intense manipulation is abusive. It is not "obviously not" abuse. Knowing that someone will feel an intense deprivation or otherwise intense emotional reaction and then using that apparent soft spot or "weakness" is the very definition of taking actions that are psychologically abusive. Some people have have an intense emotional reaction to being called out on their BS. Does that mean it's abusive to point it out? Also, how is this that different than refusing to do business with someone you don't like? If I tell one of my customers that I won't deal with him because I just learned that he beat his wife, he will have an intense emotional reaction to that. I would be guilty of using that "apparent soft spot or "weakness"" to try and get him to stop. Does that mean that I'm psychologically abusing him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donnadogsoth Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 If withholding sex is abuse, what should the legal punishment for it be? A fine, like the Frenchman suffered? I for one support all the nonviolent craziness possible in rocketting Trump to the top of the media coverage and continuing to make him and his resultant memes interesting, informative, and fun for all ages until November. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Ed Moran Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 The Deer in the video is using the idea that intense manipulation is abusive. It is not "obviously not" abuse. Knowing that someone will feel an intense deprivation or otherwise intense emotional reaction and then using that apparent soft spot or "weakness" is the very definition of taking actions that are psychologically abusive. It would be similar for a man to withhold his income from his partner if she voted for Hillary Clinton. We would hear a lot of negative opinions about that from mainstream society, but when a man is punished for having beliefs (beliefs which people are lying about the content of), it's a good thing and "female empowerment." 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WasatchMan Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 #ActLikeAMisandristGetNoManBucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luxfelix Posted March 29, 2016 Share Posted March 29, 2016 That they understand the power of ostracism = silver lining? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eschiedler Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 Some people have have an intense emotional reaction to being called out on their BS. Does that mean it's abusive to point it out? Also, how is this that different than refusing to do business with someone you don't like? If I tell one of my customers that I won't deal with him because I just learned that he beat his wife, he will have an intense emotional reaction to that. I would be guilty of using that "apparent soft spot or "weakness"" to try and get him to stop. Does that mean that I'm psychologically abusing him? You asked in the OP: "Personally, I don't see how it qualifies as abuse." If you have a separate definition for what constitutes psychological abuse, that is fine. I was merely pointing out that the man/deer in the video uses the term abuse as psychological abuse, since he is not talking about physical damage. The video is pointing out that women have made a deal to trade "net" sex for "net" benefits. Then they demand to continue the relationship, presumably getting the "net" benefits, while changing what they agreed to do which was "net" sex (of course, anecdotal relationship terms notwithstanding). Thus the maker of the video sees it as ongoing abuse of the privileges granted to them by their partner - as in, within the relationship it is abusive behavior. In your first example of someone getting upset with being called out on the bs, you didn't previously have an agreement to not call them out on their bs in exchange for something from them. That is a different relationship dynamics that merit a different term - it's called a debate and you don't have a duty of care, thus you have not committed psychological abuse. In your second example, you are cutting off all business dealings. That's fine and called rejecting a trade. But presumably, the women aren't cutting their male partner from all dealings and still want to receive all the benefits from their partner while at the same time cutting off the sex in hopes that the man will have psychological discomfort of some kind. If the man doesn't have any interest in the woman for sex at all he will presumably give nothing of any kind (time or money) to the relationship and the woman's sexual withholding would not work. An attempt to manipulate is not abuse, it is an attempt to manipulate. Ongoing manipulation is under certain conditions called psychological abuse to distinguish it from physical abuse. These are terms usually used in a relationship. Physical damage outside of a relationship is often called assault or battery. Psychological manipulation outside of a relationship is often called fraud. These are the definitions of the approach used by the maker of the video. You can disagree that these terms are not valid. That's fine. Whether the terms are valid or not or accurate or not still does not answer the question of to what extent the behavior of making sex a condition for someone's action (in this case a vote) is wrong or moral. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shirgall Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magentawave Posted April 11, 2016 Share Posted April 11, 2016 Not physical abusive but if it becomes a pattern then it is mental abuse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boss Posted April 11, 2016 Share Posted April 11, 2016 Even if you see it as a form of mental abuse(I dont) then why stay?Only hostages or mentally unstable people stay with an abusive(mentally) partner 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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