Black Anarchist Posted June 24, 2016 Share Posted June 24, 2016 Conflict with a workmate regarding a comment. There is a conflict at work regarding an individual who has since left. It is something I said. I said, “I did like her because he was probably smarter than the rest of you guys”. They also think I have a soft spot for her. Not exactly, I found out later her nature is more rebellious socialist and not anarchist. Her nature is generally un politically correct even by most pro Donald Trump supporter standards. This is why most of the office did not like her, but none had any direct conflict with her though. One day I was alone with her and I was talking about my bicycle camera. She went on to talk about her experiences with cyclist (mostly negative). One cyclist accused her of crashing into him and then trying to sue her later for damages. Look back at it, she is more of an aggressive driver then me and her insurance is more than double mine so anything was possible. She says if a cyclist gets in her way she will run him over then reverse back over him. She soon has the same talk with my other workmate. On the way to the washroom to get changed’ I said, ‘you can’t say that’. But my other workmate said. ‘You don’t understand, she was joking.’ When I brought up this comment as a comparison she said’ “she may say bad many things but none is directed at anyone in the office but your comments was”. But the comment was. I am a cyclist and she hated them enough to make this comment. It wasn’t a simple comment about cyclists being stupid. The question I tried to ask is "how bad would a negative comment about cyclists have to be before it equals my comments." How about comments about black cyclists? PS anyone know how to show I am a donator on my profile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinklingwinter Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 PS anyone know how to show I am a donator on my profile. Read the top of the page: If your donator status is incorrect, please contact Michael at [email protected] with the relevant information and it will be corrected as soon as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsayers Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 her nature is more rebellious socialist and not anarchist. Her nature is generally un politically correct even by most pro Donald Trump supporter standards. I would challenge both uses of the word "nature" here. Sorry I don't have more to add. I wasn't clear if you were asking a question or what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValueOfBrevity Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 She says if a cyclist gets in her way she will run him over then reverse back over him. She soon has the same talk with my other workmate. We can only trust your perspective in this anecdote. Maybe she was joking, but the comments she made were threatening to you. The best course of action would be to discuss it with HR so there is documentation of these behaviors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black Anarchist Posted June 25, 2016 Author Share Posted June 25, 2016 We can only trust your perspective in this anecdote. Maybe she was joking, but the comments she made were threatening to you. The best course of action would be to discuss it with HR so there is documentation of these behaviors. Its not so much what she said but the fact that my workmate is willing to defend her. I put a bit of trust in her. I intended to say something similar in future to see if she behaves any different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wdiaz03 Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 I'm a bit confused. You said you liked X because you think X was smarter than the group. X said she would run over cyclists Y said X was joking You tried comparing X comments to your first comment, Z did not agree. Who is smart in this whole exchange? Because you made a comment that directly puts into question someones intelligence. but do you have any evidence? How wise is it for me to tell someone at the office X is smarter than all of you? Do you have their IQ scores? Even then, all you can probably say is"X scored higher that Y" I think the smart thing to do is no to jump to conclusions and label people in you place of employment. You might question a statement "The comment is incorrect because...." but calling people names will not be a smart move in my opinion. Therefore X made some pretty stupid comments about running over cyclist, and you insulted your coworkers, two wrongs don't make a right. I would suggest you apologize and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sima Posted June 25, 2016 Share Posted June 25, 2016 death threats are not easy to hear... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black Anarchist Posted June 26, 2016 Author Share Posted June 26, 2016 Therefore X made some pretty stupid comments about running over cyclist, and you insulted your coworkers, two wrongs don't make a right. I would suggest you apologize and move on. I didn't say that to get anyone. If I said he she had an IQ of about 130 that might imply the same thing. The disturbing thing is that my work mate has a tolerance toxic words if they come from people from of higher social status but less tolerance if they come from me. So instead of accusing her of being like this I want to ask the comparison question. "How bad does a comment have to be regarding running over a cyclist have to be before it is equal a comment about saying one work colleague is smarter then the rest. Would she have to wave a knife in the air or promising to run over only nigro cyclists". She would have to answer the question before she gets any apology. Avoiding a "comparied to what" question only will piss me off. Many folk said I am not assertive enough and an easy target for bullies. Probably due to my lack of interest in social politics or social skills. So I will not let this go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValueOfBrevity Posted June 28, 2016 Share Posted June 28, 2016 Its not so much what she said but the fact that my workmate is willing to defend her. I put a bit of trust in her. I intended to say something similar in future to see if she behaves any different. Why did your workmate defend her if most of the office did not like her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black Anarchist Posted June 28, 2016 Author Share Posted June 28, 2016 Why did your workmate defend her if most of the office did not like her? Only speculating, but it probably down to getting on with someone of high social status.No one in the office opposed her directly.There was a lot of talk when she left though. They still think I got a soft spot for her, though we dis agree on almost everything except the hatred of gov******nt. Generally, I am willing to forget about the it. Everything in the office is back to abnormal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoomharp Posted June 30, 2016 Share Posted June 30, 2016 "PS anyone know how to show I am a donator on my profile." Send a message to Michael. [email protected] Good luck with your situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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