Wise choices for young women?

[River]

I've made some poor choices as a young woman. Most were driven by nihilism, a lack of purpose, and leftist indoctrination. I thought that I could have a lot of sex, travel without much direction, and do drugs socially because progressivism! I thought that I could avoid the college trap and pick up a trade (didn't work out due to an injury), but I find myself in-and-out of community college, constantly running into the "burden of choice". "What should I do with my life?" is a question I surely wanted to have answered 5 years ago. But, here I am, 23, asking the same question. 

Only within the last year have I realized that I want a family one day, and that I need to cultivate more attractive feminine qualities. How can I build humility, social skills, friendliness, and just a better/happier disposition? No one wants a directionless lost soul. Especially not any conservative types.

What are the wisest choices for young women to make that can help them become resilient, amazing moms? That can help them become contributing, loving, and helpful wives? How can I stop getting so anxious about finding the "right career"? Should I just get a job and go to Church? I feel embarrassed to be asking all this on an internet forum, but I really enjoy Stefan Molyneux and I imagined that this community would have some interesting things to say. 

[Siegfried von Walheim]

As a younger man who is essentially practicing this guideline for himself, I will attempt to make a simple list for young women that may or may not be doable depending on whether or not my knowledge of the world and being a woman is remotely sufficient. 

1: Recognize what your talents and weaknesses are; if you're great socially but tend to be susceptible sexually or emotionally to dangerous men/adventurous girlfriends, then consider going out with a friend you can trust to watch your back and pull you out of danger. Perhaps your social skills can compensate for what this friend is lacking. Discovering what you're good at and what you're weak on is fundamental to humility, since the whole point of being humble is to recognize one's own stengths and weaknesses as well as the strengths and weaknesses of others'.

2: This may be more true for men than women, or easier for men than women, but I'll recommend it anyway: be straightforward and honest. Speak your mind and hang out only with people you fundamentally respect. Don't talk to people you don't care about or consider low quality. Talk to people who are honest, direct, and also considerate. The last point can be hard to tell from others at first; I recommend simply asking existing friends and acquaintances for favors and gaging their reactions. If they're happy to be of help, then be helpful for them and you've got a solid proof for empathy and consideration (not perfect but a start). If they do it grudgingly, consider them work partners only. If they flat out refuse or be totally unreasonable, cross them off. 

3: Work with what you like. As a woman, work is fundamentally a temporary thing since your real career is being a wife and mother. I don't know what your finances or skill set are; if you've got a marketable skill, then use it to make enough money to live comfortably but not so much that you can be the bread winner (because you'll wind up being the foundation materially for your future family instead of your man--and that's a problem because pregnant women tend not to be great workers and working mothers tend to make bad mothers. Your man needs to the be the bread winner if you want even a decent family). In exchange you have free time to focus on yourself (mainly your strengths and weaknesses; what they are, how to work with them, and how to improve/mitigate them. 

4: Turn on your man radar and look for an alpha (defined as being a guy with ambitions who is making reasonable progress towards achieving them, isn't afraid to speak frankly to a pretty woman, and is capable of becoming a good, compassionate, and wise father). This might be harder said than done as you have to become an alpha woman yourself. Arguably an alpha woman is a woman who is straightforward; honest; intelligent (or at least wise); considerate; empathetic; motherly; and brave (especially brave in the face of disapproval and conflict, but not so much as to go actively seeking for it). 

5: Figure out what's right and wrong. If you don't know, considering the Roman Catholic Church or UPB (or both) as a starting point. Argue with yourself why X is wrong and why Y is right. Keep doing it until you have a very clear sense of right and wrong. 

If you do all this you should start off overwhelmed but becoming progressively happier and happier until you're as happy and morally strong as Stefpai. Man (and I assume Woman too) is naturally numb and/or pained when he isn't doing what he instinctively knows he should be doing; improving himself, his character, and his life. Figure yourself out, be honest and open (but not with bad and dangerous people obviously--they don't deserve it), work in a field that is fulfilling and brings pleasure (with the ultimate goal of pretty much retiring it all at 20-something and becoming a full time mom and wife), locate an alpha (guy who is actively self-improving and working to build a family and has a clear sense of right and wrong as well as directness and honesty), and perhaps most importantly: have a sturdy foundation for what's right and wrong. 

Do all this and see yourself making your life better than perhaps you could have even dreamed.

[Dylan Lawrence Moore]

I think this is an excellent question to call in the show on. 23 is still quite young--you've got time to work with.

I've heard Stef mention that if a woman has something that she wants to work on outside of family and raising children, she should focus on it after raising the children. That way her sexual market value has been fully utilized and you can focus on whatever the thing you wanted to do.

I got married last year, and leading up to that moment, one thing I kept asking myself was: "Am I worth marrying? If no, what can I do to make myself more valuable?" As a man, much of this was focused around my ability to earn an income, maintain a stable living condition, maintaining fidelity, and being confident in my actions (both around women and in a career).

You might want to ask yourself the same thing (it looks like you already are). Are you worth marrying? If not, what are the things you can do to make yourself more valuable? You may need to go to conservative church and watch the women around you for proper inspiration. Are you attractive and healthy enough (no cheating with excessive makeup and slutty clothes!!)? Can you cook well and healthily, and keep a house clean? Are you eager to pour your energy into taking care of children? Do you have annoying quirks that scare men off (I want something but I'm not going to tell you what it is)? Are your hormones properly feminine (HUGE issue in this modern day. For men, too)??? Add in whatever other questions that are pertinent. If you start focusing on this, when you bump into a male who is doing what I described above, you will be prepared to grab him. Without that preparation, he's just going to keep moving along.

In terms of your career, this is the process I had to go through in my mind: until you get your basics met (in this case, finding a marriageable man and acquiring him), you're going to be too discombobulated to focus on any career. While you're working on your feminine qualities, keep your career and what drives you in mind, and start preparing to enact that as well. That way, when you're ready to do it, say after you're married or after the kids or old enough or whatever that time is, you'll be ready to shoot off and focus on it.

Hope that helps! Really think you should call in with this one. Total waste of breeding hips if you don't figure this stuff out.

[Dylan Lawrence Moore]

Bulletproof Podcast #321: His and Hers Hormones

https://blog.bulletproof.com/dr-tami-meraglia-321/

Why You Should Listen –

Dr. Tami Meraglia is a double board certified physician in Aesthetic Medicine and Integrative & Natural Medicine. Dr. Tami is passionate about creating natural aesthetic results in her patients. Additionally, she can help discover and correct any medical conditions, hormonal deficiencies, or hormonal imbalances that help people feel and look more beautiful and energetic. On today’s episode of Bulletproof Radio, Tami and Dave talk about testosterone and other adrenal hormones, libido advice, birth control, DHEA preferences, fat for kids and more. Enjoy the show!

 

 

 

[River]

Hey Dylan, 

Thanks for such a considerate response, and the great link! Really helpful. I had tried going on a ketogenic diet before and had so much brain fog the first week that I had to get off of it. What has been your experience with diet-changes to help balance out your hormones? 

I'm just curious, how/where did you meet your wife (congratulations on the marriage!)? I've heard many people speak highly of match.com because you can filter by political preferences. Living in a liberal city is a bit of a challenge in terms of the dating arena. Many men I run into don't even think about marriage or having a family. I feel really sad that my parents had such horrible Catholic experiences that they actually raised us to be quite agnostic/uneducated on the religious front. I've checked out a few churches in my town but am overwhelmed by all the denominations within Christianity. It is challenging to choose the right fit. But, I'm very seriously interested in Christianity and feel I want to explore my religious roots. 

 

Thanks again!

[Jot]

4 minutes ago, River said:

Hey Dylan, 

Thanks for such a considerate response, and the great link! Really helpful. I had tried going on a ketogenic diet before and had so much brain fog the first week that I had to get off of it. What has been your experience with diet-changes to help balance out your hormones? 

I'm just curious, how/where did you meet your wife (congratulations on the marriage!)? I've heard many people speak highly of match.com because you can filter by political preferences. Living in a liberal city is a bit of a challenge in terms of the dating arena. Many men I run into don't even think about marriage or having a family. I feel really sad that my parents had such horrible Catholic experiences that they actually raised us to be quite agnostic/uneducated on the religious front. I've checked out a few churches in my town but am overwhelmed by all the denominations within Christianity. It is challenging to choose the right fit. But, I'm very seriously interested in Christianity and feel I want to explore my religious roots. 

 

Thanks again!

I am not getting your approach to this whole religion thing... 

You brought up being raised as an agnostic/uneducated and now you want to transition to Christianity, did I understand that properly? 

If so, why? (That is what I am unclear about) Did you listen to any of Stefan's arguments against the existence of God, the absurdity of agnosticism or read the book "against the Gods?" Do you find his arguments not strong enough or at least not persuasive enough?

[M.2]

Hi, River

I really want to save you some time by recommending Catholic Answers on youtube or catholic.com for anything relating to christianity.
You will find your answer there. They host a call-in show as well.

You will find some christians here on FDR, but people here remain mostly unconvinced about religion.

Tell us when you managed to call Mr.Molyneux!

[Siegfried von Walheim]

1 minute ago, Mishi2 said:

Hi, River

I really want to save you some time by recommending Catholic Answers on youtube or catholic.com for anything relating to christianity.
You will find your answer there. They host a call-in show as well.

You will find some christians here on FDR, but people here remain mostly unconvinced about religion.

Tell us when you managed to call Mr.Molyneux!

@River I have a post above waiting moderation. I'm directing this to Mishi...

I've been watching Catholic Answers lately; I am endlessly embarrassed about my ignorance of my own religion and heritage.

Thank you for suggesting it some months ago! 

[River]

6 minutes ago, Jot said:

I am not getting your approach to this whole religion thing... 

You brought up being raised as an agnostic/uneducated and now you want to transition to Christianity, did I understand that properly? 

If so, why? (That is what I am unclear about) Did you listen to any of Stefan's arguments against the existence of God, the absurdity of agnosticism or read the book "against the Gods?" Do you find his arguments not strong enough or at least not persuasive enough?

Hey Jot. 

I have not listened to Stefan's arguments against God, nor have I read that book. I got interested in Christianity because of three factors: 

1) The happiest people in my family are the ones who have learned about traditional approaches to living and traditional gender roles through their Baptist upbringing. Everyone in my family who is an atheist has no interest in having kids, no interest in traditionalism, and has feminist-leanings. Also, my atheist friends and family are very easily consumed by materialism, particularly movies. It's easy to fall victim to this anti-family propaganda that Hollywood pumps out. I just watched American Beauty the other night and was reminded of this reality. When I went to Church the other day, it was the first time I saw so many families and children together all in one room, laughing and smiling and taking care of each other.

2) I've really enjoyed Jordan Peterson's Maps of Meaning lectures, which argue for the importance of understanding archetypal stories (as found in the Bible). 

3) I think church communities celebrate certain values that are challenging to find in other communities. They value peacefulness (prayer), humility, grace, meaningful conversation, family, altruism, etc. Other communities that I've been tangentially involved in have much narrower values, some of them actually being antithetical to these. 

[River]

26 minutes ago, Mishi2 said:

Hi, River

I really want to save you some time by recommending Catholic Answers on youtube or catholic.com for anything relating to christianity.
You will find your answer there. They host a call-in show as well.

You will find some christians here on FDR, but people here remain mostly unconvinced about religion.

Tell us when you managed to call Mr.Molyneux!

Thank you so much! I'm very intimidated to call Molyneux, but I will tell you when/if I do manage to call-in! 

[Jot]

1 hour ago, River said:

Hey Jot. 

I have not listened to Stefan's arguments against God, nor have I read that book. I got interested in Christianity because of three factors: 

1) The happiest people in my family are the ones who have learned about traditional approaches to living and traditional gender roles through their Baptist upbringing. Everyone in my family who is an atheist has no interest in having kids, no interest in traditionalism, and has feminist-leanings. Also, my atheist friends and family are very easily consumed by materialism, particularly movies. It's easy to fall victim to this anti-family propaganda that Hollywood pumps out. I just watched American Beauty the other night and was reminded of this reality. When I went to Church the other day, it was the first time I saw so many families and children together all in one room, laughing and smiling and taking care of each other.

2) I've really enjoyed Jordan Peterson's Maps of Meaning lectures, which argue for the importance of understanding archetypal stories (as found in the Bible). 

3) I think church communities celebrate certain values that are challenging to find in other communities. They value peacefulness (prayer), humility, grace, meaningful conversation, family, altruism, etc. Other communities that I've been tangentially involved in have much narrower values, some of them actually being antithetical to these. 

I find everything you said reasonable. Stefan has been shining light on the atheist community at large and talking about the virtues of Christianity for quite some time now. 

This is not what I was arguing against. My point of contention was that your decision does not appear to be taken on the grounds of epistemological conviction. What I think you did is more of an "utilitarian" shift. As I see it, you basically said "Most atheists are unhappy/unvirtuous/shallow/self-destructive/ etc. and most Christians are the opposite and thus I am going to follow them instead". The first thing that pops into my mind is the fact that Stefan is an atheist! And he created this show and is happy and is married and empathetic and deep and etc...while having been an atheist since he was a teen! So, clearly being an atheist does bind you to being like most atheists. 

And this is why I am a bit taken aback about your line of reasoning here. The one who created this show which might be the one who influenced you the most is not a Christian and you have not given him a listen on his arguments on this issue but you have already decided to head to the Christian community already. 

[S1988]

Also, you imply that being married with children is all good and that being single with no children is all bad. It's not that black and white. Having a family isn't for everyone, and that's okay. There are many risks and responsibilities involved with having a family, so it's not something to be taken lightly. You can read more about my view here when I had a discussion with someone whose viewpoint kind of aligns with yours. 

[Dylan Lawrence Moore]

11 hours ago, River said:

Hey Dylan, 

Thanks for such a considerate response, and the great link! Really helpful. I had tried going on a ketogenic diet before and had so much brain fog the first week that I had to get off of it. What has been your experience with diet-changes to help balance out your hormones? 

 

Happy you found it useful. I have never gone full ketogenic, but I can tell you this when it comes to changing your diet: take small steps. Many of the common foods that we eat are incredibly destructive and addictive, some top contestants being sugar, wheat, corn, and soy. When you decide to stop eating these, there is a good chance your body is going to go through withdrawals (although more often it's your gut bacteria going through withdrawals putting the pressure on you). If you try to completely change your diet from one day to the next, you will get overwhelmed and crash. Pick one thing until your body adjusts and you fit it into your routine, then move onto the next. The first one I would recommend is soy: it contains an endocrine disrupter--a chemical that messes up your hormones. Sodium lauryl sulfate, a chemical commonly found in soaps, is also an endocrine disrupter. So is BPA in many plastics.

Before you go crazy figuring out proper nutrition, take some time to get your gut in order. This podcast will go into much more detail on that subject: http://justinhealth.libsyn.com/enzymes-and-digestive-support-podcast-127

Once you have your gut more or less in order, vitamin D3 and cholesterol are vital for proper hormone development. Grassfed butter and pastured eggs should be staples in your diet. Supplement vitamin D. Dave Asprey has good articles about it.

If you have issues with PMS, look into the herb chaste tree berry. I had a girlfriend who had vicious PMS, and though it didn't cure her entirely, it helped A LOT. Chaste tree berry can help your estrogen and progesterone from fluctuating too wildly from each other. Nothing freaks a boy out like a girl that spontaneously turns into a crazy bitch once a month. We won't realize it's your period, either. We just end up completely confused because we feel like we're working too hard to deal with a creature that random becomes hysterical.

11 hours ago, River said:

I'm just curious, how/where did you meet your wife (congratulations on the marriage!)? I've heard many people speak highly of match.com because you can filter by political preferences.

Thank you! I actually met her before people would admit to meeting people on the internet.  We went to the same community college and university. We never actually dated (though we hooked up on several occasions). We both ended up traveling around the world and kept in touch periodically over the internet. After I came back home from traveling (I was gone for like 4 years), she came to Washington to visit (she was living in Toronto). She came to visit me, and after staying with me for a little while, I just directly asked her to marry me. I knew her as a person that takes a long time to think before making a decision, so I thought she would take a long time to decide, but she came back the next day and said yes.

I actually wasn't as interested in her political preferences as I was in her ability to change her mind when presented with new data. Often when I ask about her political opinion, it's very leftist until I explain how things work, to which she usually says, "Woa! I never knew that." and changes her mind. I don't know if this works in both directions, but finding someone who has the political views that you have vs. finding someone who's open to changing their mind based on data is a pretty important distinction.
 

Sorry I can't give you much advice on dating websites. The only success I've ever had with those are flings. 

11 hours ago, River said:

Living in a liberal city is a bit of a challenge in terms of the dating arena. Many men I run into don't even think about marriage or having a family. I feel really sad that my parents had such horrible Catholic experiences that they actually raised us to be quite agnostic/uneducated on the religious front. I've checked out a few churches in my town but am overwhelmed by all the denominations within Christianity. It is challenging to choose the right fit. But, I'm very seriously interested in Christianity and feel I want to explore my religious roots. 

Yea, it's rough. I'm guessing what's worse, is if you do run into a man who's thinking about marriage, he probably isn't marriage quality. I had such a horrible Christian experience growing up that I turned out agnostic, or at least anti-Christian, out of the household. When it comes to understanding the various denominations, it's really important to keep history in mind and look into not just what their message is, but why they developed that message at that specific point in history. You will find denominations to be WILDLY different when you do this. A piece of media that opened my mind to this was actually The Ultimate History Lesson: A Weekend with John Taylor Gatto. You can check it out free on Youtube. I also recommend checking out The Teaching Company's History of the Catholic Church, as well as the Hardcore History Podcast Prophets of Doom. That should give you something to work with when it comes to interacting with the various denominations.

A BIG ONE I would listen to is Mark Passio's New Age Bullshit and the Suppression of the Sacred Masculine. That should give you enough knowledge to identify if any new age bullshit that has crept into a church's teachings.

I haven't gotten myself to start going back to church yet (I actually spent more time in a Shinto setting than anything else after leaving the household), but if I did, I would probably grill the pastor/minister/reverend/priest on his own organization and tenets to see how serious and able he was, as well as members of the congregation. Just like anything else, church is 95% show. Gotta find that 5%.

Something HUGE I would recommend: learn how to ask boys out. Seriously. Feminism has crushed the masculine spirit to the point where we're all afraid to ask women out--we've been taught it's violent and oppressive. When I was young/pubescent, my mother used to talk about how girls should file sexual harassment lawsuits against boys who patted them on the butt, because if they didn't it would just be flushing money down the toilet. Needless to say, I was terrified about approaching women. After completely fucking up going after two different girls and ending up with a broken heart both times, I started looking into pickup artistry and coaching for approaching women. I got on a diet/supplemental regiment to crank up my testosterone, and I learned how to identify and pass shittests. The instant I figured out how to do this, for the first time in my life girls were blowing up my phone with calls. I couldn't believe it. I felt like I had acquired the One Ring. I could have played with it, turned into a game alpha, and gotten laid to the end of my days, but I decided to take my new confidence and apply to my wife. It worked well enough to get a YES the next day.

I would recommend checking out some pickup and dating advice for men, and try using it on boys. If you can get it down, you will have almost ZERO competition. Boys are constantly competing with each other, and girls are used to sitting and waiting for the boys to come. If you can go take the one you want, you won't have any other girls trying to beat you to it. I watched a lot of YT videos by Kezia Noble to learn some game and pickup basics. If you can get this down and be confident about it, when it comes to finding a male you decide is a keeper, you won't go crazy waiting for him to make the first move.

Even on dating websites, this could give you a huge advantage. Most girls just wait for the million messages to come into their inbox and sift through them. If you can ignore those and pick out the males you want, you stand a good chance of getting a reply. Normally our dating website inboxes are full of dust.

Also, I know it's common for girls to let a boy know that you like them by telling them you really enjoyed a date/dinner/movie/whatever, and this is supposed to be an invitation for the boy to go ask for a next date. 99% of the time, THEY WILL NOT PICK IT UP. I'm dead fucking serious. I was almost 30 before I figured out what girls meant by that. When boys say something like that to each other, the response is that goes through their heads is, "Yup. It was cool." And nothing else. You can thank the feminazis that came before you: you will need to ask for the next date.

Hope that helps!

Edited October 30, 2017 by Dylan Lawrence Moore
Added something.

[Jsbrads]

Of course marriage isn't for everyone.

Tho it should be for everyone who wants to have kids.

To improve your marketability: exercise, it will improve your posture, energy, happiness and make you a calmer nicer person to be around. This will not only make you happier, but also make your body more attractive, and hopefully soon, easier childbirth. If you go running in public, try to do so with a friend, if you can't find a friend, use only public, open areas with lots of people.

Smile, practice smiling, it will make you happier. Smile at people you know, smile at strangers in safe neighborhoods/venues. 

Find a bunch of good women to be friends. 

Consider the Omega male. We all know who the Alpha male is, and the beta male is not desireable. The Omega male isn't as flashy as the Alpha, but he is intelligent, productive and can be a good father and husband. He may be an introvert, have fewer friends, but those friends are close friends, and he is less likely to cheat. 

[River]

On 10/29/2017 at 12:34 PM, Jot said:

I find everything you said reasonable. Stefan has been shining light on the atheist community at large and talking about the virtues of Christianity for quite some time now. 

This is not what I was arguing against. My point of contention was that your decision does not appear to be taken on the grounds of epistemological conviction. What I think you did is more of an "utilitarian" shift. As I see it, you basically said "Most atheists are unhappy/unvirtuous/shallow/self-destructive/ etc. and most Christians are the opposite and thus I am going to follow them instead". The first thing that pops into my mind is the fact that Stefan is an atheist! And he created this show and is happy and is married and empathetic and deep and etc...while having been an atheist since he was a teen! So, clearly being an atheist does bind you to being like most atheists. 

And this is why I am a bit taken aback about your line of reasoning here. The one who created this show which might be the one who influenced you the most is not a Christian and you have not given him a listen on his arguments on this issue but you have already decided to head to the Christian community already. 

You make a valid point.  I am investigating Christianity for its utilitarian purposes, while making generalizations about atheists that are easily refutable (Stefan being a primary example). I simply haven't found, and don't know where to look for, agnostic/atheist communities that offer the same types of social opportunities as a church. Are atheists congregating with their children and discussing/analyzing mythological stories to apply to their everyday lives? Are they having youth socials and moments of prayer and moments of grief/silence for when members have been hurt? Surely, I will be wary and cautious, but my curiosity right now is in the direction of getting together with a bunch of other people and picking their brains about things they have believed with such conviction for decades. I really don't have a better explanation other than it seems to be socially-driven. I still intend to give Stefan's videos a listen and learn what it is to be cautious about. 

[smarterthanone]

Don't do drugs or drink excessively. If the man you are seeing says hey lets get shitfaced friday or smoke a joint ok, thats one thing but to be known as someone who does that stuff is not good and will scare decent guys away.

Don't sleep with anyone you wouldn't be happy to marry and have a child with.

Don't hang out with losers. Your best friend who does drugs and goes to the club every weekend... she isn't your best friend any more.

Learn to cook, give good massages, clean properly (dust fans, clean grout etc.)

Be respectful. Please thank you. Say "Yes Sir, No Sir" to any man you are dating. I am serious.

Career wise:

- Do not go into debt. If the right man comes along and wants to start a family soon, your $50k in college debt will price you out of consideration.

- Do continue forward, keep a job, continue with school providing you can pay it off as you go. This is good for backup while you wait and also shows you aren't lazy.

- Let men you date know you do not want a career. Tell them point blank you want to be a stay at home mom. Guys who are losers will run away, real winners will love it.

I would suggest only dating men who are 5+ years older. This is a good way to see PROOF he is doing the right things in life. He will also be more likely to know exactly what he wants (ie. this kind of woman, this kind of lifestyle, kids etc.). Stef would probably disagree but food for thought.

Lastly, you are starting to get older. You aren't old by any means but note you are well into your prime years, half way (18-29)! Sure most women waste the first half of the prime years so you are on par with everyone else but if everyone jumps off a bridge should you do it too? Don't waste any more of your time. If a guy tries to talk to you, don't be busy, don't shut guys down (unless you already know they aren't good). Be approachable, smile at every half decent looking guy so that he knows if he comes and says Hi it would be welcomed. Nobody will think you are too old now, but at 25 every year you will be too old for some portion of men. On the outside edge is me for example, I want 6-10 kids. I won't date someone older than 25 and put a premium on younger than that (mostly for family planning reasons) but you will still find decent guys up to I think 28 about before your strategy for dating will need to start changing.

[River]

On 10/28/2017 at 9:21 PM, Siegfried von Walheim said:

As a younger man who is essentially practicing this guideline for himself, I will attempt to make a simple list for young women that may or may not be doable depending on whether or not my knowledge of the world and being a woman is remotely sufficient. 

1: Recognize what your talents and weaknesses are; if you're great socially but tend to be susceptible sexually or emotionally to dangerous men/adventurous girlfriends, then consider going out with a friend you can trust to watch your back and pull you out of danger. Perhaps your social skills can compensate for what this friend is lacking. Discovering what you're good at and what you're weak on is fundamental to humility, since the whole point of being humble is to recognize one's own stengths and weaknesses as well as the strengths and weaknesses of others'.

2: This may be more true for men than women, or easier for men than women, but I'll recommend it anyway: be straightforward and honest. Speak your mind and hang out only with people you fundamentally respect. Don't talk to people you don't care about or consider low quality. Talk to people who are honest, direct, and also considerate. The last point can be hard to tell from others at first; I recommend simply asking existing friends and acquaintances for favors and gaging their reactions. If they're happy to be of help, then be helpful for them and you've got a solid proof for empathy and consideration (not perfect but a start). If they do it grudgingly, consider them work partners only. If they flat out refuse or be totally unreasonable, cross them off. 

3: Work with what you like. As a woman, work is fundamentally a temporary thing since your real career is being a wife and mother. I don't know what your finances or skill set are; if you've got a marketable skill, then use it to make enough money to live comfortably but not so much that you can be the bread winner (because you'll wind up being the foundation materially for your future family instead of your man--and that's a problem because pregnant women tend not to be great workers and working mothers tend to make bad mothers. Your man needs to the be the bread winner if you want even a decent family). In exchange you have free time to focus on yourself (mainly your strengths and weaknesses; what they are, how to work with them, and how to improve/mitigate them. 

4: Turn on your man radar and look for an alpha (defined as being a guy with ambitions who is making reasonable progress towards achieving them, isn't afraid to speak frankly to a pretty woman, and is capable of becoming a good, compassionate, and wise father). This might be harder said than done as you have to become an alpha woman yourself. Arguably an alpha woman is a woman who is straightforward; honest; intelligent (or at least wise); considerate; empathetic; motherly; and brave (especially brave in the face of disapproval and conflict, but not so much as to go actively seeking for it). 

5: Figure out what's right and wrong. If you don't know, considering the Roman Catholic Church or UPB (or both) as a starting point. Argue with yourself why X is wrong and why Y is right. Keep doing it until you have a very clear sense of right and wrong. 

If you do all this you should start off overwhelmed but becoming progressively happier and happier until you're as happy and morally strong as Stefpai. Man (and I assume Woman too) is naturally numb and/or pained when he isn't doing what he instinctively knows he should be doing; improving himself, his character, and his life. Figure yourself out, be honest and open (but not with bad and dangerous people obviously--they don't deserve it), work in a field that is fulfilling and brings pleasure (with the ultimate goal of pretty much retiring it all at 20-something and becoming a full time mom and wife), locate an alpha (guy who is actively self-improving and working to build a family and has a clear sense of right and wrong as well as directness and honesty), and perhaps most importantly: have a sturdy foundation for what's right and wrong. 

Do all this and see yourself making your life better than perhaps you could have even dreamed.

Hello, Siegfried. 

Very worthy points you've made, thank you very much! Regarding point two about honesty - what are some ways you have learned to trust yourself and your ability to discern the good folks from the bad? There have been many circumstances in my life where I have passively accepted people into my world b/c I needed friendship. Sometimes I think that if I were completely honest with myself and others, I might be alot lonelier. Maybe this is a touch of neuroticism, but it seems rather difficult to develop really good friendships. 

Regarding step five - any reason why you suggest Roman Catholic over others? I always found the Catholic Worker Movement a little extreme, is it at all representative of the church's beliefs? I appreciate that you brought up this point at all, because I find it the most challenging. My parents were very easy on me growing up, tolerating a lot of my mistakes. Public school was a mess and I learned nothing about making proper choices that will ensure a dignified life. Any tips for getting over some resentment about the people/institutions that failed to tell you about how you ought to live? 

Thank you for putting all this together, much appreciated. 

 

 

[Siegfried von Walheim]

1 hour ago, River said:

Hello, Siegfried. 

Kon'ichiwa!

Quote

Very worthy points you've made, thank you very much! Regarding point two about honesty - what are some ways you have learned to trust yourself and your ability to discern the good folks from the bad? There have been many circumstances in my life where I have passively accepted people into my world b/c I needed friendship. Sometimes I think that if I were completely honest with myself and others, I might be alot lonelier. Maybe this is a touch of neuroticism, but it seems rather difficult to develop really good friendships.

Instinct. Really, I don't do very much to discern people since my actions naturally filter out people I might not like and attract those I might. The key is to act in accordance with both my beliefs and objective morality. 

However, to discern whether someone is good or bad as a shorthand, I'd recommend simple tests of empathy (do they make you wait? Do they apologize for things begrudgingly and/or make false apologies often? Are their actions inconsistent with their words? Do they get defensive easily? Do they seem to know themselves and why they make mistakes or project them onto others?) and of character (do they believe morals are subjective? Do they consider themselves entitled to X? Would they tell you a truth that might "hurt" you or lie to cover it up? Does lying come easily for them?). I think these are easily testable, and I'd recommend not dropping people who fail them immediately since they might be like you and not aware they had these problems (or that they were problems), but I wouldn't spend more than a week trying to reach out to people who fail these tests since you've only a short time to bag an alpha. An important thing, I think, is to have good friends before having any kind of boyfriend since they can act as a second (third, fourth, etc.) pair of eyes and perhaps protect you from making mistakes. Likewise you can help them, thereby demonstrating reliability and compassion, both of which are essential for attracting true alphas (reminder: guys with moral clarity, dedication to becoming fathers and breadwinners, self-knowledge, etc.)

I used to be lonely (when I was younger and a Socialist), however that all more or less ended when I started seeing a therapist, getting away from Leftism, and becoming an individual instead of... well, Stefpai's mother might be a good example of what I might have become if I didn't break off the Leftist/totalitarian/paranoid bandwagon that has infested the modern public school system on the East Coast.

A key factor in my no longer being lonely is my separation from false and fair-weather friends and inward seeking of value. I don't want to be the "smart guy", the "handsome guy", or "most likely to be successful guy" by vote of others; I want to be all that by own actions. I've become much less socially needy (i.e. needing of warm bodies) as a result of focusing on my career and bettering myself. I don't have many friends anymore but I can't say I miss them; if anything I feel as if I've made room for new friends who'd be compatible with whom I'm becoming (or more precisely making myself into): a successful man, both financially and familial. 

Quote

Regarding step five - any reason why you suggest Roman Catholic over others?

Mainly because it attempts most strongly to be objective with how its source of morality as compared to being more subjective and local like the various Protestant churches.

...Also because I came from a Roman Catholic background and therefore wish(ed) to discover more about my cultural and ethical roots. Suffice it to say, I have found it spiritually and morally satisfying. 

I can't say I've learned of much difference between the Roman and the Eastern Orthodox Churches since we're pretty much identical except in whether there should one Patriarch (the Pope) or many (the various Orthodox Patriarchs). In practice I consider this more a matter of practical philosophy (i.e. should we have one guy in charge or many?) rather than of morality. 

The strength of the Roman Catholic Church is mainly in its longevity and its strive for rationality; this has provided the Church with the best arguments for God etc. etc. and given us a moral fiber I think the Protestants lack. 

However I do not consider belief in God particularly important, but rather the moral lessons and historic depth the main thing to focus. "Why be good?" as compared to "be good or else". 

I know only a little of the other denominations, though I do know there's a lot of creepy crap going on with Jehovah's Witness and, at least until recently, the Mormons. With the latter I'd note their founder is a man who claimed visions through a hat and became a polygamist. Kinda like Mohammad minus the bloodshed. 

Quote

I always found the Catholic Worker Movement a little extreme, is it at all representative of the church's beliefs?

F*************************************************K NO. 

I only did some research about them just now (since I never heard of them before) but they have about as much representation of the Church's beliefs as the Socialist Party or the Communists does with American or Christian history/thought.

Which is to say some Roman Catholics are Socialists (like the anti-Pope), but they are the exception not the norm. Some of the strongest voices for the Free Market came from the Church, with philosophy, reason, and objectivity being the primary things most historical Catholic priests have been pursuing since the progenitor of the Church Himself. 

Quote

I appreciate that you brought up this point at all, because I find it the most challenging. My parents were very easy on me growing up, tolerating a lot of my mistakes. Public school was a mess and I learned nothing about making proper choices that will ensure a dignified life. Any tips for getting over some resentment about the people/institutions that failed to tell you about how you ought to live? 

Yeah: You don't. You cut out the people that failed you (unless they're selling life and limb to make up), admonish the institutions, and promise yourself and your future husband and children that you will not repeat their misdeeds, and instead strive towards becoming a Peaceful Parent of the Stefanist variety. 

Quote

Thank you for putting all this together, much appreciated. 

You're welcome. All of what I suggest is a personalized culmination of what I've managed to learn from Stefpai. I recommend combing his words and works about the matter for yourself since I cannot claim to be fully sure of my suggestions as I have yet to fully enact them.

Also keep in mind I am 19 with minimal romantic experience. I have some work experience and am confident in what I'm doing, however I would be cautious to take my advice since I haven't successfully demonstrated the lot of it in my own life yet. Especially as far as friends and romance since I've largely focused myself onto my work and am avoiding any kind of romantic or friendly involvement since I don't consider myself good enough or ready for anything long term until I am making six-figures.

EDIT:

This ought to go without saying but, since it's above, don't date guys who drink or do any kinds of drugs; they're losers. Unless it's mandatory for a business conference or whatever I'd treat any drinking of alcohol or taking of drugs as a deal-breaker by itself.

[Dylan Lawrence Moore]

17 hours ago, River said:

Thank you for putting all this together, much appreciated. 

Hi River, just checking to make sure you saw my last post. It got delayed for moderator approval and got stuck in the middle of the thread.

[meetjoeblack]

On ‎10‎/‎28‎/‎2017 at 10:58 PM, River said:

I've made some poor choices as a young woman. Most were driven by nihilism, a lack of purpose, and leftist indoctrination. I thought that I could have a lot of sex, travel without much direction, and do drugs socially because progressivism! I thought that I could avoid the college trap and pick up a trade (didn't work out due to an injury), but I find myself in-and-out of community college, constantly running into the "burden of choice". "What should I do with my life?" is a question I surely wanted to have answered 5 years ago. But, here I am, 23, asking the same question. 

Only within the last year have I realized that I want a family one day, and that I need to cultivate more attractive feminine qualities. How can I build humility, social skills, friendliness, and just a better/happier disposition? No one wants a directionless lost soul. Especially not any conservative types.

What are the wisest choices for young women to make that can help them become resilient, amazing moms? That can help them become contributing, loving, and helpful wives? How can I stop getting so anxious about finding the "right career"? Should I just get a job and go to Church? I feel embarrassed to be asking all this on an internet forum, but I really enjoy Stefan Molyneux and I imagined that this community would have some interesting things to say. 

We're all lost souls. We're sinners. We miss the mark. It coincides with our humanity and our genius. 

 

Congratulations on coming to this realization. I am several years older then you and let me say, what a nightmare many women are that are more my age. Many spent their 20s as a booty call. Many are now heavy set, years of partying, drugs, drinking, casual sex, and the alphas stopped calling. A woman declared the other day in a crowded shopping center. "I AM DONE WITH MEN> NEVER GETTING MARRIED, JUST NEED A GOOD LOOKING MAN FOR DICK." Same woman has IG ass pics posted online. 

 

This is the sort of nonsense that men need to sift through on a regular basis.

 

For starters, avoiding social conditioning, feminism which promotes 'sloot gonna sloot' and single mother victimhood, and then, being bitter as fuck when the options run dry. As a man in his 30s, I am not dating women my age or women with the baby rabies, looking to play homemaker after spending her best days as a one night stand. Men can always date younger. A lot of that which pretends to be their for women like feminism, society, government education actually is cheering women off the cliff. 

 

I enjoy Stefan too though, I disagree with some of his points on dating and choosing. I notice a growing amount of men who are just switching off and going MGTOW. Not getting married. It seems like the equivalent of taking your ball and going home. At the same time, I know if I were to commit to a woman, be willing to get married, start a family, she would be young like. Dedicated to reason, self knowledge, and exploring her consciousness. 

 

If you are thinking about church, give a look to Jordan Peterson's biblical series on youtube. The way he extrapolates the allegory and reintroduces the substances to these stories is incredible. I think your eyes are opening, you want a better life, and you know the promo for a shameless existence is not an argument nor the ideal way of life. I refrain from IG since 99% of what is on there is female ass pics. It doesn't take a genius to be precognitive and await the ticking time bomb of single mother victimhood that will be blowing up shortly. No man with options and a life wants to raise some other man's babies. 

 

Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed. We're all caught up in the same web of crap, social conditioning, society demonizing all that is masculine, and just poison dropping couples. All this pc crap. The race baiting. The SJWs and cutl of victimhood; I think more people are waking up but, a significant portion are reliant on government. I don't think it will change until the parade of free money ends or war happens. 

 

[River]

On 11/2/2017 at 8:45 AM, Dylan Lawrence Moore said:

Hi River, just checking to make sure you saw my last post. It got delayed for moderator approval and got stuck in the middle of the thread.

Yes! I finally got to it. I have plenty of homework to do with some of the links/references you posted. I started listening to that new-age critic and was very entertained and relieved that someone out there is telling the truth about it. Great stuff about asking people out too - definitely something I needed to hear considering my introversion. 

[meetjoeblack]

On 11/5/2017 at 4:56 PM, River said:

Yes! I finally got to it. I have plenty of homework to do with some of the links/references you posted. I started listening to that new-age critic and was very entertained and relieved that someone out there is telling the truth about it. Great stuff about asking people out too - definitely something I needed to hear considering my introversion. 

Beyond actual sex appeal, attractiveness, looks; the path you are undertaking is going to draw the ideal male candidate you seek long term to build a life with. Its ironic. Many of the systems be it feminism, government, society, SJWs, etc. that pretentiously front as though they are supporting women one way are in turn cheering women off the cliff. Its social engineering to the max with the promo for single moms, for sleeping around, for chasing career, and squandering youth. Peterson points out not listening to what people say they're about but, what they're saying they are against.

 

Good luck to you. I am sure you will do well.

[River]

16 hours ago, meetjoeblack said:

Beyond actual sex appeal, attractiveness, looks; the path you are undertaking is going to draw the ideal male candidate you seek long term to build a life with. Its ironic. Many of the systems be it feminism, government, society, SJWs, etc. that pretentiously front as though they are supporting women one way are in turn cheering women off the cliff. Its social engineering to the max with the promo for single moms, for sleeping around, for chasing career, and squandering youth. Peterson points out not listening to what people say they're about but, what they're saying they are against.

 

Good luck to you. I am sure you will do well.

It's strange to be young in America these days. I'm almost considered Generation Z (the cut off was 1995), and we've been so inundated with mass culture vis a vis technology that it can seem like utter chaos out there. I have a tremendous fear that I will never know any kind of truth, and that I am merely a composite of the ideas/beliefs being thrown around me.  It's quite alarming how easy it ease to become atomized, alienated, and ahistorical, especially with the encouragement of careerism, sexual experimentation, and agnosticism. I cannot even describe what my life is, and all the things that have come to influence the way I think. It's hard to not participate in Beatnik-type criticism that was abound in the 1960s. The emptiness of Suburbia, the monotony of work, etc. etc. I can sympathize with their distaste for materialism and conformity, but I don't think that aimless wandering was a proper response. I've seen the "modern hippie" - they're running around at Burning Man and Lightning in a Bottle, calling it enlightenment. I've seen what my generation might call "civic engagement" take the form of antifa and Kekistan-types. How do I contend with all of this? Where do I go? It's too much sometimes and very easy to get depressed about it honestly. 

*Edit: Oh and thank you for the encouragement. It's going to be challenging, but I'm glad communities like this are full of people who are critical of what passes as "progressive" these days!

[barn]

Hi River,

 

What makes you(or would make you) admant as to you won't reproduce the same issues around 'choosing' that had resulted in you arriving to the current stage in your life?

How would you be able to distinguish between having internalised the meaning of your past decisions compared to acting radically differently due to the incentive of 'wanting a change'?

Barnsley

 

[Dylan Lawrence Moore]

7 hours ago, River said:

I've seen the "modern hippie" - they're running around at Burning Man and Lightning in a Bottle, calling it enlightenment.

I just want to emphasize--make sure you listen to the full New Age Bullshit and the Suppression of the Sacred masculine. He hits on that point HARD. You can get an audio version here: https://tragedyandhope.com/peace-revolution-episode-074/

7 hours ago, River said:

It's strange to be young in America these days. I'm almost considered Generation Z (the cut off was 1995), and we've been so inundated with mass culture vis a vis technology that it can seem like utter chaos out there. I have a tremendous fear that I will never know any kind of truth, and that I am merely a composite of the ideas/beliefs being thrown around me.  It's quite alarming how easy it ease to become atomized, alienated, and ahistorical, especially with the encouragement of careerism, sexual experimentation, and agnosticism. I cannot even describe what my life is, and all the things that have come to influence the way I think. It's hard to not participate in Beatnik-type criticism that was abound in the 1960s. The emptiness of Suburbia, the monotony of work, etc. etc. I can sympathize with their distaste for materialism and conformity, but I don't think that aimless wandering was a proper response.

...

I've seen what my generation might call "civic engagement" take the form of antifa and Kekistan-types. How do I contend with all of this? Where do I go? It's too much sometimes and very easy to get depressed about it honestly. 

 

I found out recently that I'm technically a millenial. My first reaction was to be offended (harhar!). I was born in 1986, and I feel like I got to see what you're describing coalesce in front of my eyes. I feel weird being part of a generation that remembers having to memorize phone numbers and read books and magazines for information, while simultaneously "growing up" during the internet/information age. I remember getting excited when I was able to get a whopping 5 kb/s download speed on Napster.

I often feel the maw of nihilism reaching around me. It's really a battle to keep it back. I've decided to take it as an opportunity to help build a new world of meaning, and find others trying to do the same. I feel that if we're successful, we can reproduce and let the crazies die off. All of their ideas involve not reproducing, one way or another.

Hint from my own experiences: if you're aspiring to achieve something great, and it feels like you're constantly fucking up and everything is ridiculously hard, you're probably on the right path. I think this has been the experience of most humans on this planet, it's just in recent years we've had the luxury to wallow in nihilism and be fed by our misuse of our own superabundance.

[meetjoeblack]

11 hours ago, River said:

It's strange to be young in America these days. I'm almost considered Generation Z (the cut off was 1995), and we've been so inundated with mass culture vis a vis technology that it can seem like utter chaos out there. I have a tremendous fear that I will never know any kind of truth, and that I am merely a composite of the ideas/beliefs being thrown around me.  It's quite alarming how easy it ease to become atomized, alienated, and ahistorical, especially with the encouragement of careerism, sexual experimentation, and agnosticism. I cannot even describe what my life is, and all the things that have come to influence the way I think. It's hard to not participate in Beatnik-type criticism that was abound in the 1960s. The emptiness of Suburbia, the monotony of work, etc. etc. I can sympathize with their distaste for materialism and conformity, but I don't think that aimless wandering was a proper response. I've seen the "modern hippie" - they're running around at Burning Man and Lightning in a Bottle, calling it enlightenment. I've seen what my generation might call "civic engagement" take the form of antifa and Kekistan-types. How do I contend with all of this? Where do I go? It's too much sometimes and very easy to get depressed about it honestly. 

*Edit: Oh and thank you for the encouragement. It's going to be challenging, but I'm glad communities like this are full of people who are critical of what passes as "progressive" these days!

Hi River,

Prepare yourself for a wall of text lololol

I agree entirely with you. If you look at society, one of the narratives promoted is "girl power," followed by pedaling victimhood. Promo for 'sloot gonna sloot,' single moms, and banished father syndrome. Twitter had this attack on fathers day. Its fucking disgusting. Not shocking, the internet dating world is bombarded with feminists, single moms, and plummeting SMV. Bios that read, "no fuck boys" but, top form SMV is dedicated that route and fallback is marriage. Furthermore, a lot of men are being raised in single mom households, not taught to step up, to be a man, and this push for gender neutrality is just not working for anybody; male or female.

As a man, its a turn on hear a woman at a young age DEDICATED to SELF KNOWLEDGE; KNOW THY SELF! Exploring her consciousness. Into FDR, reads a book, is a free thinker, has a life outside social media, and posting ass pics on IG. At the cost of sounding like a broken record, a woman I know who is a extreme attention whore went off on a tangent: "DONE WITH MEN." She dates man child(s) for the record. She went on, "I am NEVER GETTING MARRIED. I JUST NEED A GOOD LOOKING GUY FOR DICK EVERY NOW AND THEN!" Her IG is like every other profile, ass pics, semi nudes, and attention whore. Equivalent of female posturing. Promoting the pussy bomb, ego maniac one sec, and then, classic victimhood the next. I am not talking a teen girl. I am talking a fully grow woman in her late twenties. The crash is coming. Single mother victichood will kick off before 30 not doubt. She brags about fucking guys on steroids. When they stop blowing up her phone, found someone hotter, thinner, younger, she tries to hit up friend. He is now dating someone much younger and she is furious. Product of a single mom household and following social conditioning. Applaud yourself for unplugging from the Matrix, for taking the red pill, for being a FREE THINKER, and navigating your life.

We all are as you said, a composite of ideas, ideologies, and beliefs. We're socially conditioned. We're still very much so tribal. If someone screams RAPE/RACISM/MISOGYNY etc, its Gandalf, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" Its classic genetic ostracism. The more I become aware of it, the more I adopt aversion, and become more alienated from people. I am working on self knowledge, reason, and evidence. I am reading about the yoga sutras, Sanskrit, Gita, meditating, practicing yoga, exercising, eating healthy (adding in herbs and spices to spike dopamine, GABA, AcH, serotonin, etc), and keep my testosterone levels high especially as I age. This life path is not easy because society promotes "DURRRRRR!" It promotes mediocrity and all that is amateur hour. Play it safe. Nothing about confidence, about how to meet a stranger, how a man should put himself out to meet a woman such as yourself. Instead, it is demonizing all that is masculine. The Obama administration input legislation on college campuses whereby, any sort of unwarranted advances such as asking a woman out could be deemed sexual assault (Source: Men on Strike by Helen Smith). It doesn't promote stepping up as a man, as couples, and it really coincides with that broken nuclear family.

I work with many women who would gladly be stay at home moms but, they pissed years away chasing careers and running up the student bubble. For the record, YOU CANNOT DECLARE BANKRUPTCY ON STUDENT LOANS. Its BLOOD MONEY! Your forced into the workplace and at gun point because you cannot negotiate for yourself since you are slave to your master while in debt. The ratio is 4:1 women to men in college. The promo for "don't need a man" equates to how disposable men are in society in 2017. A woman is suppose to spend her years chasing career and pissing away her youth, her SMV (sexual market value) and what, GO NUTS AT 30 + trying to lockdown a good man?

 

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/11/all-the-single-ladies/308654/

Please, do yourself a favor, and have a quick read through this article above.

Woman age 28 drops bf who she loves. She says 20s was for "finding herself." Translation: "sloot gonna sloot." Present day, options are gone, CANNOT GET THE RING, and its pity party time on STEROIDS!

You ducked this lifestyle by choosing SELF KNOWLEDGE! You're not on this life path. I don't even know what you look like but, I would be THRILLED to meet a young woman putting herself out like this. Stepping up. Seeing the carnage all around and taking drastic action to not be a statistic. Good for you. Continue on your path. Maybe do some traveling, look at exploring the world, consciousness, and think about what you want in this life time?

What are you reading currently? A good author to check out is Daivd Deida. I think you would really like his work.

I know what you mean by get depressed and what to do about it? I've approach a ridiculous amount of women in my life be it bars, clubs, gym, coffee shop, library, college campuses, etc. I thought by now, I would be married, wife, and kids. The white picket fence. A dog even. Its not turned out that way and THANK GOD. For starters, I am not ready yet, and I have yet to find the sort of woman I could stake EVERYTHING ON. Risk my net worth which isn't to say, I am rich by any means. Far from it. Its the time, the effort, and energy but, most important of all, choosing the MOTHER OF MY FUTURE CHILDREN! If any man has put themselves out as much as I have, they would have gone MGTOW a long time ago but, THIS VISION SUPERSEDES EVERYTHING. On my death bed, I can look back and say, I did everything in my power to find the best ideal woman for my future children without regret. Its not about looks or ass pics on social media. If I get sick or were to die, my wife needs to hold down the fort, and my children cannot end up in foster care or abandoned all together.

The increase in mental health in women is a by product of that fast party girl lifestyle. It doesn't end well but, it definitely adds to the daddy government requirement.

I don't know g how best to answer your question but, suggest you do your best! Live. Love. Learn. Laugh! Talk to more people. Put yourself out there. Make friends. Interact. Find more like minded people. I am watching Jordan Peterson's biblical series on Youtube. He is well spoken and great at extrapolating the meaning. Something that caught my attention in his recent video was that, he said every time God calls upon someone, its not as though life is all rainbows and gum drops. Its a rocky path answering that calling and chaos along the way even still before reaching "the promised land."

Nothing great ever came easy. This life isn't suppose to be easy but, we are from a generation that pedaled participation trophies and ribbons for doing nothing. 17yrs of government education has been a joke.

Its journey. Not the destination. Enjoy this life. In Asia, many gurus and mystics don't answer questions with an answer the way people do in the west. They typically respond with another question therefore, you must come up with an answer yourself.

To answer your question, what would make this journey all the more worth while when you look back on your life? Start here. Keep me posted. Its nice knowing there still are women like this out there.