I essentially de-fooed from my family about three years ago. It wasn't a formal conversation, but rather an argument that escalated. I realized that I was happier when I didn't have any contact with them (my parents and my younger sister) as we had had previous times when we weren't speaking. Since that argument I haven't had any contact at all with my parents or my sister. The problem is, I still think about them and wonder about them. I found out that my sister was getting married because I google-searched her name and found her wedding registry online. But I can't figure out why I am google-searching her name in the first place. I know that I don't really miss my sister or my parents, but rather the idea and fantasy of having a loving and supportive family. But every time I think about them now, it just stirs up hurt all over again and makes me feel angry and sad all over again (like I'm going back in time and de-fooing all over again).
Thoughts?
