ThatAtheistPlace

@dsayers, are you serious? That was an iPhone 5s and 2 iPads. You can even see one we kept rolling on the left. You are TOOOO kind, lol. Edited in Premiere. Thanks for watching, you guys!!

What if your best friend told you that they sincerely believe a flying baby can grant their wishes of true love? Not too far off from if they were to say they are praying to an invisible dude to help them find their soulmate, is it? Website: http://ThatAtheistPlace.com Twitter: http://Twitter.com/AtheistPlace

Really nice to see a well deliberated version of (Essentially) Stef's Feminism podcasts:

He lost me at Ron Paul, but still worth a watch to see the words "What if a government that manipulated us could be fired?" uttered on TV. http://themindunleashed.org/2014/01/judge-napolitano-get-fired-fox-5-mins.html

Wow! Thanks y'all and thanks Stefan. This is so me right now. I gotta agree with other posters, DaVinci.... Being stuck doesn't sound like acceptance at all. How've things been going in the new year? :-)

1) Denial: Whatever, everything I know can't possibly be bullshit 2) Anger: Why in the hell did everyone feed me this bullshit?! 3) Bargaining: Perhaps I can still maintain some sort of relationship with the bullshitters 4) Depression: Why can't I unlearn this and just swallow the bullshit?! 5) Acceptance: Fuck the bullshit.

Wait... what happened?

I agree!!! What the hell?

Sad that this calls for education "reform" instead of disbandment.

I tend to feel uneasy talking to guys about my relationship problems, lol. Thank you to everyone who had extremely helpful advice for me recently, and thanks for not being this guy:

I guess. But this particular video missed the funny mark however you look at it.

Wherever you go, there you are. I've found it helpful to generally enjoy life. You're really not in a prison. I know what you mean by that, but you absolutely have the ability to eat what you want, date who you want, go where you want for the most part. Even at $695 a year, that's what? About an additional $60 a month tax? That sucks, but it's manageable. The point is, you have to get yourself to a place in which, when everything's said and done, the state looks ridiculous. Like, you would try to hand me a bag and tell me to go pick some cotton today, I would laugh at you. TODAY when someone tells you that you have to take money away from your purse to purchase healthy foods or pay for a gym membership in order to pay for not having health insurance? That shit is comical. TOMORROW when we ask a little kid if he's walking to school, he will start cracking up.

I was just thinking that. How sad it must be for the children that you don't hear who are neglected, given the evil eye, starved or whose souls have just generally been crushed.

I'm just curious. Isn't the fee for not having insurance about $30 a year? Or do you know what it is? Do you currently have insurance? If not, then why not continue on and chalk the fee up to yet another tax. Or, if you need insurance, get a cheaper one (which are probably even cheaper if they're not on the "required" list) and again, just pay the fine for not having insurance. I don't think that this should be a tipping point for you. If you want to move, move, but don't let people you didn't give power over you have that much power over you.

Earplugs? If you do hear thrashing around and loud bumps and then crying, or something to that effect, call the police. If you see someone simply neglecting their child, call the police. Otherwise, I'd chalk it up to the reasons you gave or bad parenting. (surprise surprise)

That's pretty much how I feel about it, as well. That's why I was thoroughly confused by Stef's response video to the situation, "The Truth about Trayvon Martin". It left me feeling that he was faulting Trayvon almost completely and painting him as someone on a bender looking for a fight, which I can't understand to be true. About OJ? Black people didn't care if he was innocent or guilty (not that I speak for all) but it was more so just sheer elation over the fact that, for once, a black man "beat" the system. To be entirely honest with you, I shared that feeling. It was very unfortunate that two people lost their lives, but for the scales of this "justice" system to tip our way? Wow. Even recently, knowing what I know, and knowing just how bought and paid for and evil and manipulative you must be to make it to the highest political post possible, I was still quite happy to see Obama win the candidacy. Again, just because there is a large part of me that knows how much the odds are against us for succeeding at anything that society generally deems positive. With that being said, I wish black people and all people would hold onto that ability to overlook innocence or guilt. Primarily because I think that will help people move beyond vengefulness and punishment as it's traditionally enacted. I'd like to see, in a free society, where as soon as it was known that George Zimmerman shot and killed a young man, he is escorted off to be psychologically evaluated and given therapy. I also really like the DRO model that Stef put forth where he could work off his penance while receiving treatment to possibly even be reintegrated into society. I've sincerely asked myself that if someone were to murder my child, what would I do. Obviously, I don't know or ever want to know (I don't even have kids), but I'd imagine that I would harbor as much sympathy for the killer as I did for myself and my child. I just can't imagine how hellish someone's life must have been to get to a point in which they would harm a child at all, especially fatally. ***caveat - I would never put my child in a situation where they were around someone harmful. I'm referring to a situation like if we're walking down the street and someone just comes up and does something.*** All in all, I agree, Rex, Everyone absolutely lost in the TM/GZ situation, but the question then is, even without enough evidence to determine self defense, why allow someone who has the propensity to even be in violent situations walk free with no counseling or consideration of the fact that regardless of why, he did take someone's life. I think his behavior as of late speaks to how necessary that was and how skewed pro-GZers were in the first place.

I'm sure if you contact Stef he could work something out with you, or g'head and donate (you will NOT regret it).

Child Protective Services Supervisor.... Wow. I'm in Charlotte, and it's weird that I saw maybe 2 stories about this and it's doubtful that it will be on anyone's mind's after next week :-( Foster care as a whole, a system that pays just about anybody to house kids who others have to pay and struggle to adopt... It is hard to do, but i think it is absolutely crucial that we seek insight into the twisted minds that can entertain these thoughts so that we can know what signs to look for in the future, though. Makes it even more important to dispell mythology and these insanely loose definitions of morality that I'm sure these people harbored.

Whyyyy does any of this matter? In all seriousness and no offense meant, what is the point of concerning ourselves with politics at all? Aside from knowing where to send my tax money or knowing what I have to do to stay out of jail, why is any of this important?

Daniel, the sheer fact that you are posing these questions speaks volumes as to how the rest of your children's lives will play out already. It sounds like your eyes are beginning to open, but that you may still have a lot of work ahead. Their formative years have already established you as a distant, violent, irrational man, it would seem, so it may require more than a book and a few podcasts for you to realize how deep the hole was dug in order for you to undo that damage initially. Again, kudos on initiating such a difficult conversation and I, for one, appreciate just how honest you're being. A couple of things that jump out at me... It makes me wonder why your wife would want to emulate a relationship that ultimately failed? Also, why do you call your children "the boy" or "the older boy" etc? That's probably a very tiny thing, but it just makes me feel like the disconnect that happened from you not physically being there still lingers deeply within yourself, as well as them. i get the impression that you feel they push you away, but you really can't blame them for not accepting your attempts at closeness when it sounds like you're approaching them with the preconceived notion/self-fulfilling prophecy that they don't want your affections. Now that you are around them more often, are your rebuffed attempts to connect with your children calling forth feelings that you've experienced before? Have there been other times in your life, particularly with your own parents, where you have attempted to be close only to have your affections minimized or met with coldness? I don't have many immediate answers for you, other than that you are sincerely going to have to take your time to reach them again. You and your wife would benefit from therapy and a look back at how both your adolescences are recreating themselves in some way. But to have both a wild child and a severe introvert on your hands both would seem to come from a serious lack of boundary establishment (one has none and the other created a massive one) and from not truly allowing them to develop their own identities. At 4 and even at an 11 that's taking his time, they have these fully formed personalities that are just brimming beneath a surface of authority figures telling them who they are and who they should be and how they can best be "good". This is all just my two cents, obviously, but man I would highly recommend you grabbing a copy of the first bit of Peaceful Parenting from Stef and trying to foster a serious curiosity about your kids, as opposed to simply seeking a different way of managing them. I really hope this helps and isn't coming across wrong. It's obvious you love your children, because you're seeking to go down this path, but that "love" shouldn't be exhibited as it was defined for you growing up, if that makes sense?

It seems to be two different things. It seems like that would be true for the older generation, but for the younger generation of rap culture obviously, guns are touted. Even so, it's not like you see a bunch of young black kids going for their concealed weapons license. I think it's more that the culture of time and being a gangster is what is lifted up.

What was your wife's childhood like? When you say full-time mother, does that mean she home-schools the oldest, or are the kids in school and/or preschool? And I agree with Nathan, it would be helpful to know more about how you disciplined them? From what you've posted it sounds like you spanked, tried to stop spanking and talk to your children, but spanked when they didn't listen, and are now considering spanking as the primary means of correction? Also, when you say "I can't accept the poor results of trying to rationalize with a 4 year old." can you give a specific situation that details how you've attempted this? What an awful thing to say. Especially if they are basically at a "normal" developmental level, I'm guessing? What did you feel when the specialist told you this? Again, just from the post, it sounds like you weren't really taken aback? This is just an observation, but I thought you should know my overall impression from how you wrote this was that you don't expect much of your children? If that's true, is that because of what their physician's have said or is there another reason? When you say you've listened to some FDR podcasts can you expound? Thanks and what a wonderful post. I commend you for seeking more clarity around this subject and I am looking forward to others' responses!

Oh wow! That gives me hope with my boyfriend, lol. Welcome and good on you!!

Sooo..... why don't you just e-mail him?

Stef has a greeeeeat video on this: http://youtu.be/nIXyR_C8dFs I appreciate you taking the time to outline as much as you did and I'm so sorry that you're having to go through such a confusing period in your relationship! I completely understand that anxiety of not knowing whether to trust your eyes or your boyfriend, but the issue then, is not what you saw, it sounds like. More so, that it is the fact that you feel an inability to tell him what you thought you saw. Usually when this happens, it feels that we will be attacked in some way? Is that the case? Even if you feel like he will withdraw when delving into the conversation, that withdrawal can feel just as hurtful. Is this what you fear about discussing your anxiety about what you saw? Another thought is that maybe because he witnessed his father keeping secrets from his mother and that the revelation of those secrets lead to that whole kitchen scene... maybe he associated keeping information that he feels is hurtful away from you with protecting you in some way? I wonder if his mother is the type to insist that she can be told something, only to get upset when she IS told? My mother was very much like that. "Oh, honey, I won't be mad. You can tell me anything." ***drop some truth***, "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST SAID THAT TO ME!!" ...kind of thing? That may explain why your attempts to show him how calm you can be about it force him deeper into a lie? I was that way for quite some time, so I can completely understand how your boyfriend and Felix may have felt. I know that it's draining to write these things out, but I sincerely hope some of the ideas (not the bashing from people who can't be bothered to read your entire post) can help in some way.