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kerou

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Everything posted by kerou

  1. Hey guys, My office has a book club that does a reading every bi-quarter, and it will be my turn to come up with a book suggestion soon. The book has to do with something that can be extracted and applied to our company and direct management. I thought this would be a good time to introduce some of my coworkers to some subtle philosophy. Mostly everyone at my work is a conservative and pro-trump, so I'm not worried about offending people. But I dont want to beat them over the head with anarcho books. I was thinking Objective Communication would be a good book suggestion, but wanted to reach out and see if anyone had any good suggestions on the matter
  2. Hi everyone, Sorry for not responding sooner. I really appreciate everyone's thoughts and opinions on this matter. I brought it up to my gf a few weeks ago and we have started a continual conversation about it in an effort to come to terms with my past. She told me that she feels an anger unlike anything she's felt toward my ex due to the circumstances in which the relationship ended and the general culture of that relationship as toxic. I told her about my regrets and feelings of liking her to a level I didn't even know was possible being a cause of the regret. We also talked about that experience made me the person I am today and the benefits that we both get from that (my level of appreciation of her, my patience with waiting for sex, etc). But basically we've started a dialogue about it and will continue to work on it. Just wanted to thank everyone for their thoughts.
  3. When I was getting tested for 'disabilities' because dyslexia is pretty common in my family on my dad's side, I got an IQ test. In fact, the whole test was just an IQ test and all they do is compare how you did in each section and if there's one section that is much lower in comparison to the other sections, they say you have a disability.
  4. So, I've recently starting dating a girl, who is almost literally the girl of my dreams -She comes from a good family, parents are still together and she is very close to them and her brother -was never spanked as a child -is anarcho in politics -is conservative in nature -financially stable, good job and no college debt -never had a boyfriend -still a virgin -probably an 8/10 in looks IMO We've agreed not to have sex until we're 100% committed and she's ready But here's the thing, I've had a girlfriend in the past and am not a virgin. It was a bad relationship and something we've actually talked about a lot because she wanted to make sure I was completely over it and had a good assessment of what went wrong (from both ends) But lately, I've been feeling guilt about not being a virgin anymore. I'm not sure why, though. I know I will treasure her a lot regardless, but I also recognize that a lot of this guilt is regret. She's told me that she doesn't feel weird or bad about it, but she is concerned (wants me to get an STD check, which i will) and wants to take things slow regardless. Does anyone have any thoughts or experiences with these emotions and how can i come to terms with them?
  5. This. It's so strange to hear the terms r/k thrown around in broad sweeping generalizations to the point where it almost becomes genetic determinism. It deletes a lot of the responsibility of people's triumphs and failures to just being r/k selected behavior. It's an interesting theory and has a lot of applications--but I think the application of the Aristotelian mean is in order here. Stef and FDR have gone way off the deep end with these r/k accusations. You can hear this in the call in shows when Stef will call someone 'R' as a demeaning insult or chalk their poor decision making to being 'R'. This view also seems to be the reason why FDR has turned more nationalistic/conservative over the past months. It's a disturbing trend that I hope I am just making up. This isn't to discredit any of the research and finding in the Gene wars series, as it is fantastic and useful information with the application of epigenetics. But I agree that this whole dichotomy has been taken way too far.
  6. I actually read that study a while back ago. The way they did it was completely bogus. They would send these cookie cutter and very stale statements with the CV's. If you were an employer reading one of the Cover Letters, it's so vague it almost seems like a scam of some sort. Put that with a weird looking name and you have something sounding like a Nigerian Prince wanting to give you money. I recommend looking up that study up and seeing how ridiculously half assed their attempts at fake CV's were.
  7. I know it doesn't exist. I put this argument forward as an empirical proof that can be used in discussions to disprove white privileged to the common person. It's similar to the wage gap empirical argument; "If women are always underpaid, why don't business men just hire all women and save 30 cents on every dollar?" And it's important to note that society and the general public will always identify you as a minority as well. It's really hard for me to find any time where being white or identifying as white would have ever benefited me either.
  8. This is something I've been giving a lot of thought to in relation to my own race and identification People say white privilege exists in the sense that being white, identifying as white or looking white gives special treatment of a higher quality to that individual. However, if we take an empirical look at difference case studies where the choice of race is present, we find a very different story. Biracial people have a choice as to what they are identified as. In my own case, I am half Asian (Chinese) and half white (French), as such I have the ability to identify as either Asian or White. However, I always choose identify as Asian. We see the same thing with other types of biracial people (half black, half white; half hispanic, half white); consistently, these biracial people always choose the minority side to identify as (which theoretically is the oppressed and less privileged side) If white privilege existed, wouldn't it be in everyone's rational self interest to identify as white and to tote the white side up as their main identification in hopes of some off hand privilege? This is not case in the majority of biracial people. And the reason why is that the minority side or culture offers a lot more benefits. In my own case, I tend to identify as Asian because it offers me a lot more. I am able to have better conversations with people, people assume I am highly intelligent and have a level of competency, it gives me a certain authority on things like race issues, etc. Part of this may be that I look very Asian for a biracial person, however my brother, who is also biracial, looks very White yet still chooses to identify as Asian when given the choice for similar reasons as outlined above. Any thoughts on this? Could this be used a sound argument against self hating white people as a proof to nonexistence of white privilege?
  9. This is a very bizarre sense I've seen a lot on this board. It's not bad, it's just odd that everyone gets skeptical and almost punchy at the mention of a good childhood. I've made posts in the past about my experience of childhood and my relationship with my parents and brother. You can PM me if you want to chat more about it, I'd be happy to. To answer your question, this board has value to me because I inherently value philosophy, self knowledge and entrepreneurship. To me, the extension of the NAP to childhood is a looked over but not revolutionary concept. I've worked with kids a lot in the past (taught math to 3rd graders and held art classes for elementary kids) so I've always had an interest and love for children. Getting into the psychology aspect of children is fascinating to me since I only studied STEM fields--I never took time to look into psychology--and it turns out I really love it.
  10. I actually had a very happy childhood, so video games were never a dysfunctional escape for me. However, my brother and I did play a lot of video games together, especially when he got older than 10, we used video games to build our own social circle of friends--good friends. I think there is a certain amount of implicit gratitude I feel towards Nintendo and Iwata for these memories. These have been very useful thoughts for me, thank you I definitely would not. That's why I was so surprised that I found myself actually weeping at the news and feel so emotional over it. I have never cried over the death of a celebrity or someone who I didn't personally know So this was a very new experience for me--I take solace in the fact that I felt emotional over this man because of the value he provided me and millions of others.
  11. Recently, Nintendo's CEO Iwata Satoru died. This is a man that I have never met, talked to or had any meaningful relationship with other than watching his Nintendo Direct Q&A's and playing the games he programmed as a child. When I heard of his death, however, I found myself crying--and I have no idea why I tried doing a lot of reflecting as to why I felt so emotional about it, and the only thing I can come up with is because Iwata had such an integral part to making Nintendo the company that I love. He was a key programmer and designer for a lot of my favorite childhood games (Kirby, SSB, Pokemon, etc). I guess there was a legacy that he left behind that I found so beautiful yet tragic. And so that left me wondering, is part of the reason I found myself so emotional over his death because I could see the legacy of joy he left and felt like I would be lacking in the same way or is it something much more simple? What are you thoughts on weeping for people you have never met? Especially in this case where this was just a guy who ran a company that I liked to give my money to.
  12. My mistake, when I posted my response I saw nothing in the OP other than the title Must have been a bug Anyways, I think we all were somewhat hoping this would be an interesting opener to a more interesting discussion. A little too optimistic maybe?
  13. Did you mean to post something? I can give my thoughts either way. When I heard that the Supreme Court passed this, I felt odd and on an emotional level, uneasy. Then I realized I only felt like this after seeing everyone's rabbid reaction. I found out I felt awful about this whole thing because everyone I knew was having an attitude that basically boiled down to boot licking the government and thanking them for this divine dictate from the heavens telling them what they can and can't do. I thought this would be a good catalyst for people to say 'why the hell was the government even involved in matters of the heart in the first place?' Which would hopefully lead to questions on matters if the wallet . But that doesn't seem to be the case on a majority level It was illuminating to see just how entrenched people are in matters of politics.
  14. I managed to get access to Netflix and started watching this show. I'm in episode 8ish As a big comics fan since I was a kid, I am so impressed so far. Particularly how they are delving into the childhood of Matt and kingpin. Matt reminds me a lot of simon the boxer from stefs rtr book. I'm also impressed they went into matts relationship with Stick and some if his brutality. I'm also impressed with how the use of force is portrayed in thus show. It doesn't show force as something that fixes the problem but just makes it more complicated and messy I might try to make a full review of it after u finish, but I'm impressed so far!
  15. I have yet to watch it. I'm actually a really big comics guy ever since I was a kid and I've heard great things about this series. I just dont have netflix, but I loved your mini review of it. I will find someone to bum a netflix account off of eventually. Haha
  16. Listening through some if his stuff I really like him, talks about his relationship with his father, how he had to cut him off and the group discussions with his wife are great It's really spectacular seeing a positive black role model. Great find!
  17. I own a 3d printer and use it for varying purposes. I mostly used to use it for my small business I ran in college for making custom toys and props. For hobby purposes it's incredibly useful, but beyond that, you won't get much of a return on investment on it. It is also worth to note that you need to have a pretty decent skillset in 3d modeling in order to get full use out of these printers. I don't run my business anymore but I still use it to make custom displays and other knick-knacks (see below) What exactly would you want to use the printer for and how much 3d modeling experience do you have? (Also, there are many kinds of 3d printers, FDM, SLA, etc)
  18. I might be missing something, but I don't understand what either one of you are trying to say. Can you try rephrasing your thoughts?
  19. So I'll give a brief but hopefully useful summary of my family, specifically my father and mother. Hopefully this will answer everyone's questions in some form I come from a biracial family, my father is white, my mother is Chinese. My father grew up in a despicably abusive household where his father would consistently fist fight his sons and beat them unconscious. I've never met my grandfather because of this (my dad cut all ties and contact with his side of the family). My dad became a stay at home dad and later on a business owner. My mother was born in America and her parents came to America from China during the red army takeover. My grandma and grandpa were childhood friends and business partners who escaped by strapping gold to their bodies and going to Taiwan and then coming to America. My grandparents from my Asian side have been the most influential forces of non violence in my life. My father had taken a stand of nonviolence due to his own past but had a tendency of raising his voice and yelling at my older brother (before I was born). According to him, it was my grandparents that helped him control his voice and be more peaceful--to which I am incredibly grateful. It is also worth noting that my grandparents have a very unusual distain for culture, specifically Chinese culture and mysticism. Now on to my mom. My mom is quite frankly, simple. I've never seen her wear make up a day in my life. She take 5 mins to get ready and outfit of choice is a tshirt 5 times too large. She's also incredibly smart, she went to MIT when she was 15. I am very close to my parents and they were foundational in my world view (my dad being a libertarian and my mom a minarchist) they taught my brother and I very early on about negotiation and free market values. Also hugs were our main currency as kids. I remember as a kid thinking my parents have the best hugs. It is also noteworthy, I have never seen my parents yell or fight with each other. They've had disagreements but I don't remember those ever being a painful thing. I had mentioned that between my brother and I, I was the more rebellious one. To give more light into that statement, an example is that when I was about to go to college we were discussing what would be good career paths for me. My mom thought I'd make an excellent programmer, I wanted to be a civil engineer. My mom thought that the engineering curriculum might be difficult and I wouldn't enjoy the work so she suggested architecture, as it's slightly easier and more creative. This made me of course double down and go into engineering to prove that could do it, and I did. Though I ended up switching from civil to environmental due to the difficulty of the structural engineering courses. So in a way she was right, but I'm still proud of my achievement (it's also worthy noting that I was very young when I went to college because I hated high school so much I decided to work hard and graduate early. So I was 16 when I went to college). In contrast, my brother wanted to be a doctor, my mom told his that being a doctor is generally very miserable and riddled with debt, so she suggested being a dentist instead. He accepted that compromise and is generally very happy with his career. However, one failing I must attribute to them as parents was the general lack of preparation for the dating world. I remember as a kid them telling me that the person you choose to marry is the most important decision of your life, but that's the extent of it. Now on to my relationship. My parents were both equally opposed to it. It wasn't until I started dating her that my dad told me about his past relationships and how this woman reminded him of someone he used to date--she was petty and materialistic. I however, ignored his warning believing that my ex was not like that at all. My mom was less upfront about the disproval because she didn't want to tell me what and what not to do, but she would constantly tell me things that made her uneasy about our relationship and things that I should watch for. In general, they were both very cold to her. As for what I saw in this woman, I saw a determination that I found attractive. This is not a defense of her but I would like to point out that I gained a lot from our relationship, I just kept it going for too long. And yes she was manipulative, and I should have realized that. I had all the warning signs, people telling me and consciousness to know that. In hindsight it's clear to see that the sex was why I stayed--and it was very good sex. I have been recently talking about this destruction and collapse with my parents, and I am grateful there is no 'I told you so's being flung my way, we are generally confused as to why I didn't listen. My mom thinks itself because I rarely ever listen unless there is a very strong logical case made and she admits that they failed to make a logical case. They just cited traits that they thought were worrisome and and told me personal anecdotal stories. There may be some validity in that, but something tells me that anything short of slapping me with my own penis would not have been enough and I'm struggling to find out why. Sorry for the lengthy summary, hopefully this answered some of your questions. If not let me know
  20. To give context: I just got out of what can be called, quite frankly, a dysfunctional relationship. The relationship lasted for 4 years and we were engaged. My parent's never approved of her, not because of any status. In fact, they quite liked her on first meeting. But a second or third meeting with her, they told me they don't like her. They didn't like the way she spoke to me (often times belittling), what she spoke about (usually money or shopping) or her attitude (better than thou). They made this clear to me and they made this quite clear to her as well. Nonetheless I continued in my pussy-blindness. I still think she wasn't intentionally manipulative, but an objective hind-sight view shows me that whether she meant to be or not--she was incredibly manipulative of me and I fell for it hook-line and sinker. When I wanted to marry her, I asked my parent for their blessing and they denied it. I was very upset about this--almost to where I was going to elope with her. But they and my brother talked me out of it. 6 months into the engagement and I found out she had been cheating on me as well as a whole slew of other hidden issues. I swiftly end the relationship. Our last conversation together had to do with my parents. She bitched and moaned about how they were never welcoming to her and they always hated her and how I was 'a momma's boy' (an insult she frequently used despite the fact that it is quite untrue). So I'm left here in with the pieces 6 months later and it's all starting to make sense. But one thing I am struggling with is WHY I didn't listen to my parents or my brother when they warned me of her. I'm trying to think through my childhood--between my brother and me, I was always the 'rebellious' one (though my version of rebellion was about as mild as you could get with the term). I was never spanked, yelled at or abused. Always well fed and had my emotions tended to. My father was a stay at home dad until I was 11 or 12--and he was the largest opponent of my relationship with this woman. I've done a lot of self work, journaling and have talked extensively about the failure with my family. But the one thing I can't understand is why, in the moment, I refused to listen or heed my parent's warning on this subject. Does anyone have any thoughts on the matter?
  21. I think putting forward the question, "Radical, compared to what?" In many ways, the current political system, which people view as lukewarm or moderate, is incredibly radical. So in essence, political change is just one form of radical thought with a moving benchmark. Rationality is a good option to combat radical movements--as political movement inevitably become a series of platitudes and repeated hashtags. Following the logic and extending that logic to it's natural conclusion would be a good first step. The logic of, "What is the difference between love making and rape? How about theft and charity?" Well, the answer is the initiation of force against others will. You follow that note to it's logical conclusion, and you will get the NAP as the benchmark of morality. Under that framework, any sort of political movement is, by nature, a radical movement for the advocation of force--which has been established as immoral under this logical framework. I think if you follow the logic and create a good argument, under the given framework the professor can't say anything negative about it without a good counter argument. Best of luck!
  22. My immediate family (Father, mother, brother) and myself have DEFOO'd from our extended family One of the best things we did was that we all legally had our last names changed (to different last names) It's been a great tool in protecting our identities
  23. Just finished watching it. It was a really unique concept and some of the shared telepathy moments in regards to family and childhood were profound But the last 20 mins of the movie went full retard. I honestly lost all interest when it became a starcrossed-lover story Also, the main female lead was the definition of an estrogen leech. In general, it was poorly written but had a great gimmick which made for a really nice scene or two.
  24. Yeah. I mean you can tell her parents helped her write a lot of this speech, but it's true. Funny story, I grew up in Florida. When my brother and I were in elementary, my mom got pissed at the school system and took us out and put us into a private school. They were trying to hop me up on ADHD drugs and they wanted to hold my brother back for not doing well on his FCAT since he had 'dyslexia'. We're now professionals, I'm an engineer and he's a dentist. Out apparent 'disabilities' were only a disability in a ass-backwards school system. Otherwise, they were just pros and cons--strengths and weaknesses. A different wiring in our brain that and gave us thought patterns different from the norm. There was no disability involved. But standardize testing doesn't take that kind of thing into account (pattern recognition, creative solutions, etc) ...You know what does take all of that and skills + abilities into account? IQ tests!
  25. Tell us about yourself first. It's difficult to make any meaningful suggestion without first knowing who you are. What are you good at? What do you enjoy? What are your weaknesses and what are areas of improvement? These are all very important questions that needed to be answered before you can expect anyone to help you out.
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