xavierhc97

After reading this, a feeling has settled deep in my stomach, it's sickening feeling, one of terror. I think it is because I'm not living my values to be painfully honest, I'm avoiding something when I listen FDR podcasts and even when I post on this forum. Fundamentally I don't follow the ethos of Freedomain Radio and philosophy its' self; the truth. What I have wrote on these forums as of now has been more authentic than anything I have ever done however that's not saying much. I want to apologize for being some-what fake during my short time here on the forums but it extends farther than that... I feel as if I'm being driven rock bottom as a pressure builds when I participate in the FDR conversation. I don't think I have ever truly thought or meditated about anything Stefan Molyneux has said about self-knowledge, I understand that is a massive insult to him so apologies. This is what I mean by "I don't live my values", however I consider them mine as a warlord (or political leader) would claim a country as their land! I question even if these are my values and not just inherited from a bias I have for FDR. Truly, thank you for the reply and please do so again soon. I think I'm getting closer.

Coincidentally, I found Freedomain Radio whilst surfing YouTube (in a zombie-like fashion), now I want to change my state of nonliving. From my perspective, I was rolling around in a 5x5 metre cell until I uncovered a golden key in the dirt which unlocked the door to my illusory prison. I peaked through the crack in the door and saw the FDR community and thread that linked to your blog posts ("The Free Fall Journal" & "Save $20,000 on Therapy by Buying a $20 Journal"). I'm not sure if it was your post but it helped me a lot to find writing tolerable and now I'm starting to enjoy it, so thank you for the well written blog posts!

This resonates with me, I strongly agree that a degree of autonomy is what applied self-knowledge results and is intended for. To be able to survive the rocks and maybe even sail to some truly beautiful places is very exciting for me. Awesome reply and thank you, this helps me a metric frick ton! I would have said "a shitty life is one with a low relative health (mentally and physically)". In some ways that is true for me, however after reading wdiaz03s' post I change my rudimentary definition and the question. "A shitty life" is subjective because it depends on whom you ask, I don't find the pluming trade very fun at all, but others go through four years of apprenticeship for the job. In stead I want to change my statement about what I want from Freedomain Radio, I want autonomy which in turn gives me freedom in my life! The way I think I will arrive to truths about myself is to ask "why?" without conclusion. This is how I'm going to start my epic voyage of self-discovery and I believe this will take me to journaling, therapy and aboard this magnificent galleon called Freedomain Radio. I want to know how you all go about this journey, how you strive for self-knowledge and how your experience has been doing so. Thank you for the responses!

I'm having a large amount of trouble typing my thoughts and feelings let alone a friendly greeting. However I figured that I would "free-fall" write this so the quality of communication will be less than if I were to structure my writing. I do this because I am desperate to connect with people who are on the path of self-knowledge. So greetings from Australia, I am Xavier and I have been a FDR listener for approximately a year. I wish I could say: I want self-knowledge, I want to find the truth about myself and the world. But all I get when I think of what I want from this conversation when I participate, is a blankness and feelings of anxiety. However, after I type that sentence one thing comes to mind... I don't want my life to be shit. I don't know what I mean by this other than, to be healthy mentally and physically. So I have a question for you: Why Self-Knowledge? Why is it better for us to pursue self-knowledge rather than not? I can make an intellectual case from the standard of health however I don't think I believe it or understand it on a visceral level. I say that because I don't know why or if I want self-knowledge because I haven't taken it seriously before, I haven't pursued self-knowledge, not up until now perhaps. I would like to hear what you think about my post and the question above. Thank you for reading, I will see you on this thread and many other threads!