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Posts
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Joined
Everything posted by Tyne
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That is an interesting point that I hadn't considered, but very true. I myself am half white half black/Native American and of identifying as racially mixed isn't an option, I default to identifying as black, even thou my skin is white. I was raised by my black mother, and identify with pride with the cultural legacy of her side of the family, but my white family members have contributed significantly to society as well, but get little recognition and certainly not for being white. In elementary school, during the standardize testing, I marked that I was African American every time, even before I heard that I'd be scored more favorably for doing so (not sure if there's any validity to that statement. I think my father might have told me that; he is a middle school teacher in a predominantly black neighborhood.) I found out I'd have access to grants for college and have a better chance at getting hired for identifying as black.... So, at what point has looking white served me? Maybe with police interactions, but who could be certain. I'm a pretty cute chick, so I think that might trump all racial privilege I might have.
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Help? Looking for source on neglected children
Tyne replied to utopian's topic in Peaceful Parenting
Can't quite recall which video it was, but I remember this: He was talking about Socialism in Russia- what happens to a society where the consequences of promiscuity are removed by government. It was part of an introduction to a talk about Welfare in America. He was using this as a historical example. -
AnarcoB, that makes sense. What you're saying coincides with the idea that you look to who is influencing your child's behavior if you feel there needs to be a change, not to the child and then beg for or demand higher standards than what they're being shown.
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Political Spectrum Test
Tyne replied to WasatchMan's topic in Libertarianism, Anarchism and Economics
I got Economic Left/Right: 1.88 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian -5.46 -
Thank you. This is all fantastic advice! I will keep trying, and I'm sure he'll get it. Usually, when he's smacking me or someone in the face playfully, it's hard not to laugh, but we do want him to understand his own strength and that it can hurt others. I haven't tried making the redirection more fun than the initial hitting, but it makes total sense now that you guys mention it.
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In a recent podcast, Stefan mentioned briefly a study done on infants that suggested that children as young as 3 months old cold preform moral reasoning. I believe babies and toddlers do have a strong sense of right and wrong, and I know that my pre-verbal son has a comprehension that far outstrips his vocabulary. However, I don't quite get how to morally reason with my son. An example of a common problem I have might be bittimg me during breastfeeding, which is playful but painful. Or smacking my face when he gets exited (again, playful but painful.) I try signing "pain" when he does these things while telling him "ouch. That hurts mommy," but I don't think he gets it at all. Maybe this isn't a good example of what Stefan was talking about, or maybe my approach is all wrong. What do you all do in these situations? Does anyone know of this study that Stefan was talking about?
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Please send me one, too. [email protected] Thank you!
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New mom, an a philosophical kamikaze mission to save her family
Tyne replied to Tyne's topic in Introduce Yourself!
Melomomma I would love to know more about your experience in "crunchy" parenting. I'm so glad there are more moms like me here! Where I live, I was beginning to lose hope in finding parents who didn't act like children themselves. I will definitely be looking in to Somatic Experience therapy! I am very eager to get back to a therapist. We started seeing one together, but the cost was a bit more than we could manage, and the therapist we chose wasn't in our healthcare network, so we're still looking. -
New mom, an a philosophical kamikaze mission to save her family
Tyne replied to Tyne's topic in Introduce Yourself!
Anuojat's And jpahmad, I have been dying to have a conversation with Stefan and Mile about my marriage. I will definitely be emailing them soon. Kurtis, I have listened to RTR a couple of times. There is definitely some very valuable knowledge in there, but it was very challenging for me to wrap my head around a few of the concepts. I'm going to listen to it again and keep trying to connect with the information. -
New mom, an a philosophical kamikaze mission to save her family
Tyne replied to Tyne's topic in Introduce Yourself!
Thanks Utopian! I think that's an amazing question and I'm honored to share my thoughts. I've been considering it all day and I by no means have a definitive answer; the personalities and motives of women are so varied and complex, I don't think I could cast a net that wide, but here's hoping we can ensnare at least a few worthy specimens. I think intelligent women would be automatically drawn to philosophical topics of interest. For me, that was parenting. I wish I had discovered the show sooner, for all the troubles that could have been averted in my life, but when I first started watching Stefan's YouTube channel, I would pass up anything political or in the news for parenting and relationship advice. Once I realized the political arguments were tied in with the social and family and relationship arguments, I started listening to everything. So understanding what burning questions women have about life and starting there would be a great way to set them on a path of philosophy. I feel like I stand apart from most women (which might begin to explain why I hesitate to speak for women as a whole) because I care deeply about the minds and hearts of men, which I feel has been sadly forgotten in these modern times. Society focuses on the dynamic female role models, the struggles and triumphs of the women behind the men, and so on. For some reason, women and girls look to other women for answers. why are we not asking the men? I think that a lot of women are convinced that the only thing a man wants is sex and a way to manipulate women, which stifles curiosity with a religious answer: "men only want one thing, so why bother...." Or "men are stupid." So sad, but if we could show women that men can have empathy for them, and that they can be a valuable source of wisdom, maybe they could trust men with answering those burning life questions. As for my situation with my husband and I, as we currently stand, we've stopped providing value to each other. I have been neglecting myself, which he finds repugnant, and he has been mean, passive aggressive, and a bully. His requests are very simple, like "clean the dishes before I get home so I can make dinner," or "take a shower and brush your teeth," so doing these things aren't hard, and they don't go against my preferences, but he has trouble understanding why I might be struggling with these things, and lacks any curiosity about me or what I might be experiencing. Instead he bullies, I whine, he dismisses, makes up a story about something I didn't say, and doesn't listen. Its very frustrating and makes me feel resentful- even resistant to doing things that would be good for me. -
Hello all you truly beautiful brains out there. :-) I'm a sculptor/illustrator and a first time mom. I was introduced to peaceful parenting by my husband, who is a libertarian, and thus became a ravenous consumer of philosophy. Although my journey into self knowledge isn't even a full year in, it has been a reality breaking experience; a horror and a delight. When I found out I was pregnant two years ago, I knew I wanted the best for my child, so I took great care of my body. But that wasn't enough for me. I wanted to give my child the best entry into the world, so I had a home birth with a midwife, doulahs, without drugs, and breastfed. But that wasn't enough. I wanted to have a strong bond with my son, so he would always know the comfort of a responsive parent, so I wore him in carriers, co slept and practiced attachment parenting. All of this I did out of a commitment to offering the very best early parenting I could offer, even if it was uncomfortable or inconvenient at the time. However, if I had to choose only one of these parenting practices to raise my child by above all the rest, I would choose philosophical parenting. Nothing seems quite as fundamentally necessary as parenting (and living life) with consistent principles. It seems like a child can overcome any challenging beginnings if his parents can simply dedicate themselves to being loving, rational roll-models. And yet, here I find in lies the greatest challenge I have yet to face. My husband and I argue almost every week. We struggle with communication and seem to be drifting far apart. For all of our commitment to good parenting we can't seem to get this thing right. We both come from divorced parents and seem to be set on a corse for familial destruction. I'm dedicated to doing anything I can to salvage this situation for my child's sake- not mine, not my husband's. I want a better life for the future.