Thanks LoneWolf, that's not it.
I thought it was Disappointment with the World or Empathy as Weakness. I've reviewed dozens of videos but I can't find it. I saw it and it stuck in my head but when I went to look for it again the details were gone.
If I find it I will update. Thanks for your effort.
Why did it hit me hard? When you get old you find out who your friends really are!