CallMeViolet Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Call me Violet please. It's what I willl be changing my name to soon. I recently completely cut ties with my family; following my older brothers example. He doesn't talk to anyone in the family either. I thought he had the right idea and did the same. I'm a 22 year old artist; my life before philosophy and even before psychology was art. I always say "I've been doing this since I could hold a crayon" because I can't give you an age, and my mother says " all of my kids are good at art because they've had crayons since they could hold things".. or something along those lines. No I'm not close with my mother by any means. She's always been strange towards me. Mostly .-aggressively controlling ; making negative comments about most things involving myself. She of course hit all of us as "punishments". Allowed an alcoholic to not only psychologically and emotionally destroy her children but also beat my brothers over stupid stuff when he was drinking . In turn they started beating me up really bad later... My incredibly unstable childhood has led to an incredibly unstable adulthood as you'd guess... Lucky for me though I have a key factors that will get me out of the cycle. I have self awareness, empathy, and a need for progress. I evaluated myself and those in my life and decided I need to meet people with those same qualities or I will never have a happy life.. Also I don't want to hang out with people who say nobody is capable of true change because I know two other people besides myself that have and met a few on their way. I want to be friends with people who understand that anything is possible with knowledge and compassion, and that force is never acceptable. Unfortunately I have crohns disease; who knows how long I've had what because I was only diagnosed about a two years ago. Even though I also had abdominal pains since I'm not even sure, my parents failed to get me medical treatment and that just led to a serious of crap situations. My goal is to become self sustainable completely from art and various media what nots, get married, and then be an amazing full time mother . I'm very excited for the future.
Gtype Posted July 15, 2014 Posted July 15, 2014 Hi Violet,I'm sorry for what happened to you. Do you know how all this effected your past relationships? Any dysfunctional "habits" that you had to evaluate and fix? Just curious.Turmeric may also help as well. It is a strong anti-inflammatory. http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2009/02/17/Super-Spice-Secrets-This-Miracle-Spice-Stops-Cancer-Alzheimers-and-Arthritis.aspx
Timur Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 Welcome to the board Violet. I'm terribly sorry to hear about your past. It's truly horrible and I'd be surprised if your health situation wasn't affected by a stressful upbringing. I've heard of a guy that had a debilitating bowel condition which was cured once he went through some significant psychotherapy. Have you looked at meetup groups yet?
CallMeViolet Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 Hey you guys! Really vitamin c?? I was under the impression that would just make my immune system stronger and then it would just attack my intestines worse.. I will have to look into it more. Not like my doctors would tell me! Also I've heard some good things about tumeric and cancer I believe as well. Hadn't heard of the inflammation part though.. I can definitely see how therapy helps. I was getting good results when I was going. Now I just work out, paint, bake, take vitamins, avoid dealing with bad people. Well I have a lot of problems trusting people; though I don't think that's entirely fare to say because I don't really think I've known very many trust worthy peopl.. I am very paranoid at times that people are mad at me or seemingly threatening when they start getting loud. I tend to get emotional when I think people are judging me. Some people really just don't want to deal with people who have been through so much either sometimes. Like I did something wrong by being abused as a child.
Gtype Posted July 16, 2014 Posted July 16, 2014 I don't think you have "problems" trusting bad people. You were taught that way since you were initially betrayed by your brothers who you cared for most, right? Just a theory.Stop blaming yourself, it isn't your fault. You were taught to be paranoid because of the horrendous conditions you were brought up in by your parents and mostly your brothers, right? Like constantly being alert if you're going to get attacked by your brothers if things escalate, you were taught to be more alert when this happens...I truly do sympathize. Why did you stop seeing a therapist?
CallMeViolet Posted July 16, 2014 Author Posted July 16, 2014 I moved. Then I didn't have a ride. Most of my issues can be fixed by a fuckin ride to somewhere. my family would only do that which had to be done and only with this bullshit better appreciate how far out of my way I'm going to be driving your ass to the doctor attitude. my dad would drink on the way back from my remicade infusions so yeah.. idk... had to chose between therapy or physical health... which is stupid because they directly affect each other. The people in my family who could help me simply do not. Apparently they just think I'm a loser who put myself in this situation. My friends can't really afford to. For a while I could only go to u of m doctors but now i could switch. so i could start going again actually.
CallMeViolet Posted July 18, 2014 Author Posted July 18, 2014 Not a real one. I want my own show REALLY bad. lol I'm excited.. I can't paint fast enough!!! I need to force myself to like always be painting.
AustinJames Posted July 19, 2014 Posted July 19, 2014 Call me Violet please. It's what I willl be changing my name to soon. I recently completely cut ties with my family; following my older brothers example. He doesn't talk to anyone in the family either. I thought he had the right idea and did the same.I'm a 22 year old artist; my life before philosophy and even before psychology was art. I always say "I've been doing this since I could hold a crayon" because I can't give you an age, and my mother says " all of my kids are good at art because they've had crayons since they could hold things".. or something along those lines.No I'm not close with my mother by any means. She's always been strange towards me. Mostly .-aggressively controlling ; making negative comments about most things involving myself. She of course hit all of us as "punishments". Allowed an alcoholic to not only psychologically and emotionally destroy her children but also beat my brothers over stupid stuff when he was drinking . In turn they started beating me up really bad later...My incredibly unstable childhood has led to an incredibly unstable adulthood as you'd guess... Lucky for me though I have a key factors that will get me out of the cycle. I have self awareness, empathy, and a need for progress.I evaluated myself and those in my life and decided I need to meet people with those same qualities or I will never have a happy life.. Also I don't want to hang out with people who say nobody is capable of true change because I know two other people besides myself that have and met a few on their way.I want to be friends with people who understand that anything is possible with knowledge and compassion, and that force is never acceptable. Unfortunately I have crohns disease; who knows how long I've had what because I was only diagnosed about a two years ago. Welcome, and thanks for sharing! Have you tried any probiotics for your condition? I have a cousin with Crohn's Disease, and he has been able to live a normal and comfortable life, utilizing homemade yogurt, kefir, and cultured vegetables. I have also adopted a diet rich in probiotic foods, with beneficial results.
CallMeViolet Posted August 27, 2014 Author Posted August 27, 2014 That's cool, you can more than likely have your own show. My brother is an artist. He tells me that the art world is small, and so, it doesn't take long to meet the right people (i.e.Curators or people that know them, or even art collectors). Hopefully you have artist buddies. If not, then it's a good thing you are on the FDR forums, since there seem to be plenty of artists here. Tell your brother about me?? :3
adamNJ Posted October 2, 2014 Posted October 2, 2014 My incredibly unstable childhood has led to an incredibly unstable adulthood as you'd guess... Lucky for me though I have a key factors that will get me out of the cycle. I have self awareness, empathy, and a need for progress. I admire your courage
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